TVs Are Starting To Revolt!
by Reneey Umbra
Summary: Reneey is determined to get Lyn to watch Yu Yu Hakusho, even though Lyn isn't so crazy about the idea. Then there is a mysterious phone call, and someone wants to know what their favorite TV show is...
1. Chapter 1

"Lynniiiiiiiiii," whined a girl with black hair.

"Oh, give it a rest, Reneey," sighed a girl with dark brown hair as she turned pale green eyes on her friend. "I'll be in there in a minute, dagnabbit! I have to finish this..."

"But what's more important than Yu Yu Hakusho!? It's like the best anime ever! Well, next to Yu-Gi-Oh! And it's on in like one minute!"

"You forget," Lyn said, rolling her eyes, "I've never even _seen_ the dadburned show. I don't care if I miss ten seconds of it! And I have to finish my tea first, unless you want to deal with me when I'm in caffeine-and-sugar withdrawal."

"And that's why we're watching from the first episode, so you can see it, damn it! Hurry up!" Reneey snapped this in a whiny way. All week long, she had been trying to get Lyn to watch Yu Yu Hakusho, and finally Lyn had agreed.

Lyn groaned and poured sugar in the tea she had been steeping until finally she judged it was enough. Then she poured herself a tall glass and put the rest in the refrigerator to cool. "All right, I'm coming," she said, and came to sit down on the floor next to Reneey.

Then the theme song came on. "This is.. quite cheesy," Lyn commented.

"Yeah, but it gets stuck in your head. Running in a crowd in a faceless town, I need to feel the touch of a friend in the countryside..."

"Reneey," Lyn warned, "sing it and I will disown you as a friend."

"But it gets stuck in ya heaaad..."

"What's the song called, anyway?"

"Smile Bomb."

Lyn just twitched and shook her head.

"Hey, Lynni.. what if..."

"No, don't you dare even say it!" Lyn objected. "If we were to get sucked into that blasted thing, I wouldn't have a clue what was going on!"

"That's why I'm here! But anyway, what if we were in there!? In the TV show!?"

"Reneey," Lyn growled, "I swear, if we get sucked in there, I will keel you _so_ dead..."

Reneey sighed and pouted.

"Whoa, what are you doing with my body!?" Ghost Yusuke yelled at the paramedics on the TV.

"How long does it take him to realize he's dead?" Lyn asked boredly.

"Longer than the pasty-dead people..."

Suddenly, Lyn's home phone rang.

"That's strange," she said curiously. "Nobody's supposed to call."

"Hey, Lynni," Reneey said, grinning. "Ring, Scary Movie 3, or Scream. Pick!"

"Definitely not the Ring," Lyn said thoughtfully, one hand hovering over the phone. "I dunno, hard choice between Scary Movie 3 and Scream..."

"Pick it up and put it on speaker," Reneey said, going over to the phone.

Lyn shrugged and did as she was told.

"Hello," said a voice.

"We can cancel Scary Movie 3," Lyn muttered.

"Would you like to see something?"

"Well, Scream is out," Reneey said.

"Depends on what you wanna know if we wanna see," Lyn said suspiciously.

"What's a show you like?"

Lyn actually laughed. "Well, Rea, I think we have a new scary movie on our hands. The Curse of the Dude Who Asks About TV Shows. I'm kinda like Drew Barrymore in Scream, though, y'know? She couldn't pick a scary movie, so how're we s'posta pick a TV show?"

"YU YU HAKUSHO!" Reneey shouted.

"Yu Yu Hakusho.. ah, that show. I remember. Have fun with your quest."

The person hung up, and the girls blinked.

Lyn's green eyes switched to her friend and she said slowly, "Reneey..."

"What the hell?"

Lyn made a face and muttered, "Why do I feel like we're about to --"

She was cutt off when suddenly the world dissolved into green, blue, and black, and both girls blacked out.

"Owie... stupid effing horns," Reneey mumbled.

"What happened?" Lyn mumbled as her eyes slowly came open.

"Er, Lyn.. since when was ya room a street...?

"A -- a street?"

Just then there was a HONK HONK.

"DAGNABBIT, RENEEY, GET UP!"

Lyn pulled Reneey up and they ran to the sidewalk together.

"Hey! How come you never told me that ya room was a street!?" Reneey demanded, grinning, hands on her hips.

Lyn's right eye twitched, and then suddenly grabbed Reneey by the shoulders and shook her.

"MY ROOM ISN'T A STREET, YOU MORON! IT'S WHATEVER YOU SAID TO THAT DUDE ON THE PHONE! AND IF WE ACTUALLY ARE IN YU YU HAKUSHO, I AM SO GONNA KILL YOU!"

Reneey was shaking so that he head was bobbing back and forth, but she just yelled back, "BUT IT'S THAT PERSON IN THAT PHONE THING! AND LOOKIE, WE'RE IN JAPAN!"

Lyn just screamed wordlessly and released her friend, throwing her hands in the air.

"Lynni, it's not like we're dead or anything like that," Reneey said, shrugging. "Besides, this means we get to meet Kurama!"

"That redhead?" Lyn asked, remembering seeing him from an episode guide.

"Yeap, yeap!"

"Oh yeah..." Lyn muttered slowly. Then suddenly she exploded again, yelling: "BUT YOU HAD TO PICK YU YU HAKUSHO! YOU COULDN'T PICK YU-GI-OH!? THAT ONE'S SO MUCH MORE AWESOME, AND THEN WE COULD'VE MET KAIBA, HE'S TOTALLY HOTTER THAN KURAMA!"

"HEY!" Reneey exploded right back at Lyn. "YOU SHOULD SEE YOUKO AND KUROUNE! THEY ARE FREGGING HOTTER THAN KAIBA! AND ADD HIEI IN THIRD WITH KARASU! BUT KUROUNE IS DEAD BUT MAYBE HE'LL BE ALIVE HERE AS A HUMAN OR SOMETHING!"

Lyn stared for a second before yelling again: "I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK, YOU THINK SCOTTY VANITY IS HOT! ANYWAY, I'M A SETO KAIBA FANGIRL AND UNASHAMED! HE IS SOOO MUCH HOTTER THAN ANY OTHER ANIME GUY THAT IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY!"

"YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ALL OF THE ANIME GUYS! OKAY I DON'T KNOW ALL OF THEM, BUT I KNOW A FUCK OF A LOT MORE THAN YOU AND THERE'S MANY MORE THAT ARE HOTTER THAN SETO!"

"Um, excuse me," someone said. But the girls took no notice of the boy, and Lyn kept on yelling.

"NO WAY, THERE IS NO ANIME GUY HOTTER THAN SETO KAIBA, AND I'M A FANGIRL SO I KNOW! BECAUSE HE'S SO TOTALLY AWESOME AND SARCASTIC AND DRAMATIC AND PROTECTIVE AND --"

"WELL, YUOKO AND KUROUNE AND KARASUE ARE AWESOMELY AWESOME, YOUKO N KUROUNE ARE KING OF THIEVES, CRUEL, RUTHLESS, AND KARASUE CAN MAKE BOMBS OUT OF THE BLUE!"

"How do you know about Youko and Kuroune?"

"Can't ya see we're yelling, Kurama?" Reneey snapped.

Lyn, however, froze. "Er.. Reneey," she said slowly, staring at the boy with her right eyebrow raised. "Remember what I was saying about how I'm gonna kill you if we really _are_ in Yu Yu Hakusho?"

"Yeah, so? You say that all the time!"

"YOU DON'T GET US SUCKED INTO ANIME TV SHOWS ALL THE TIME, YOU COTTON-PICKING IDGET! LOOK AT WHO YOU WERE JUST YELLING AT, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE! LOOKIT HIM AND TELL ME WHO IT IS!"

There was fury in Lyn's green eyes, and the finger she was pointing toward Kurama was trembling with wrath.

Reneey looked from Lyn to the confused redhead, blinked for a moment until her brain started working, and then --

"OMG, YOU'RE KURAMA!"

"Shhh, don't call me that!" Kurama hissed. "Please, around humans, call me Shuiichi!"

Lyn blinked. "But aren't _we_ humans? So therefore shouldn't you deny being Kurama?"

"Well, you did say that you know Youko and Kuroune. How do you know them?" Sparks of gold reached his green eyes.

Reneey grinned. "Well --"

Lyn kicked her and hissed, "Don't tell people, idget! What, do you want people to think we're insane or been smoking something really good or to actually believe us and try to kill us or something!?"

"This is _Kurama_, he won't kill us! Trust me, eh? You won't, right?"

Kurama sweatdropped and said, "I promise you no harm."

"See, Lynni!? But if we do tell.. can ya let out Youko?"

Kurama blinked. "Why?"

"Because she's an obsessed fangirl," Lyn said, shaking her head. "Okay, let's see. Yeah, okay. I have a plan."

And she turned and walked a few feet to lean against a building. "My awesome plan: I don't know you! And I can play it up really well because I have absolutely no clue what's going on! Ain't it awesome!?"

She flashed a grin and proceeded to cross her arms and look up at the sky with mild interest.

Reneey blinked. "Er, wha?"

Lyn, however, continued to stare at the sky as if she had been bidden to memorize the pattern of the molecules in a particular cloud.

Reneey shrugged and turned back to Kurama. "Yes or no, pickie!"

_Let me out!_ Youko thought.

"Fine, but tell me first."

"Okay, ya see, where we come from, you all are a TV show! We know it all -- well, I know it all -- future crap -- like how to save ya mother and, yeah!"

Kurama blinked. "I already know that, though."

"But ya live!"

"Huh? How do I live?"

"Ya see."

"Y'all had better get on with it or I'm gonna go walk around randomly till I find something remotely interesting," Lyn said in a sing-song voice as she tapped her foot impatiently.

"Right, so you're from.. a different dimension?" Kurama asked slowly.

"Eh, guess so. Ya see, this dude called us and went all 'Tell me ya favorite show!' so I said Yu Yu Hakusho which is the show ya in and here we are!"

_Interesting,_ Youko thought.

"Yes, you HAD to pick Yu Yu Hakusho and deprive me of my only chance to actually meet Seto Kaiba," Lyn growled, still staring resolutely at the sky. "You _couldn't_ take into consideration that I've never even seen this retarded show and have no idea what's going on. And you can't keep your mouth shut when random people walk up and ask who we are. Oh, no! That would have been a _stupid_ move."

"Oh, stop acting pissy, it's not like ya not used to it! Oh, Im' Reneey and this is Lyn," she added to Kurama.

"Pleasure to meet you."

"Now, about Youko..."

"Are you a _complete_ idget?" Lyn hissed wearily, finally dropping her gaze from the sky to look at Reneey like she rather thought her friend was completely hopeless. "He can't do it in public! Honestly, you're as bad as the fourteen-year-old idget perv who took five minutes to figure out he was _dead_ after getting hit by a cotton-picking _car_..."

"Right. Here, meet me at nighttime at the park. You do have a place to go, right?"

"Errr," Reneey muttered.

"Ummm," Lyn said slowly.

"Well, techinically," Reneey started.

"We don't really even know how we got here or even exactly where here is," Lyn finished. "And I don't suppose you have any Japanese money hidden in one of your ten thousand pockets, Rea, do you?"

"Err, hold on," Reneey muttered and went looking through the pockets of her NYC TRIPP pants.

"You know," Kurama offered, "You could stay at my place."

"Okay," Reneey announced, "I found ten dollars! How much is that in Japan?"

Lyn made a face and began beating her head against the wall she had previously been leaning up against, muttering something about "idget," "money changing," and "I _have_ American money, moron" under her breath.

Finally she sighed, shook her head, and turned back to Kurama. "If it isn't too much trouble," she said resignedly, still hating to rely on other people even when she didn't actually have another choice.

"No, not at all," Kurama answered, and so they left.


	2. Chapter 2

"I'm telling you now, Youko is hotter than Seto!"

_I've been called sexy and hot by older people, but never.. have I been called hot by a thirteen-year-old human girl,_ Youko said in Kurama's mind.

Lyn scoffed her disagreeance. "Dude, Rea, _Kurama's_ better looking than Youko! And Seto is just the hottest of hot, it's _impossible_ to be hotter than him."

"Um, thank you," Kurama said, blushing, while Youko went off with ranting that only Kurama could hear.

"Karasu can kill him in a snap!" Reneey objected. "He makes a big, shiny, green bomb!"

"Who's Karasu?"

"A quest class demon," Reneey told Kurama.

"Wait," Lyn said slowly, "Karasu can kill who? Seto or Kurama?"

"Seto! Kurama kills Karasu."

"How?" Kurama asked.

"Ya'll see."

Lyn laughed. "Rea, you should've learned by now: it's impossible to kill Seto! He always has some awesome new invention at the last minute that saves him. Need I remind you of the awesome transforming blimp? Or the Blue-Eyes White Dragon jet? Or any of the virtual reality or hologram stuff, really, those are just _awesome_... And, he has awesome hacking skills! And virtual TNT to blow up virtual doors!"

"You can't hack these kinds of bombs, and if Youko takes out death tree plant and Ougji, then he's doomed! 'Cause in Ougji you can't move, but feath free plant, you have to move!"

_I never thought about that, gotta try that out one time._

What am I gonna do with you? Kurama thought.

"Whoever said anything about hacking the bombs?" Lyn asked, grinning. "I was just making a point. Hacking skills are just an awesome plus. And anyway, _how_ many explosions has he survived, and still looked so totally hot doing it? And he's been turned to stone, had people out after his soul, been possessed... I mean, come on, you just can't keep him down! Especially when he's being all uber protective, like the time he stole the motorcycle to save Mokuba, that was _so_ awesome. And really, he's just so _hot_ on a base hotness level, even without the awesome attitude and the hacking skills and all."

Then she paused for a breath and went ranting on: "And anyway, what kind of a retarded name is death tree plant? If it's a tree, of course it's a plant. It's like an idiom or an oxymoron or something. No, wait, those mean it's contradictory.. but whatever! Anyway, Blue-Eyes White Dragon sounds much cooler. Probably because it's a _dragon_."

"But none of those can kill them, all the ones I said could kill him!"

"That's what they all said," Lyn said with a smirk as she used Reneey's own line against her.

"Hey! My death tree plant has acid rain that could melt human bones!" a voice came out of Kurama that wasn't his.

Lyn just shrugged. "Still a stupid name," she said blandly. "Very redundant."

"Hey, that's my line, bitch!" Reneey snapped.

"Well, what kind of name is _Blue-Eyes White Dragon_?"

Lyn ignored Reneey's comment and said, "It's an _awesome_ name, that's what kind of name it is. Although not entirely true. The actual dragon looks a lot more blue than white, to be honest."

"Well, fuck you," Reneey hmphed but grinned, and Kurama just shook his head.

Humans.. never did stop amazing me, Youko thought.

"Well, fine, then," Lyn said loftily, crossing her arms. "The next time you need help with your homework, you can find somebody else to supply you with awesome random facts about Jesse James and Doc Holliday."

"Eh, screw that shit."

"School is important," Kurama said.

"Ai, I swear, if you go all parenty on me, I'll shove ya rose whip down ya throat! I already got one parent..."

She glanced at Lyn, who had literally dragged her to school numerous times.

"Ah, but ain't that what friends are for?" Lyn asked, grinning. "Too bad that it'll be considered kidnapping when school starts again, though, since I won't be in high school anymore..."

"And you had to teach ya little demon kids ya grandma babysits to drag me out of bed and push me to school," Reneey growled at Lyn.

"You finished high school? I'm only fourteen, how old are you?"

"Sixteen," Lyn said, shrugging. "I skipped a couple grades..."

"Wow, so you're going to college when you're only sixteen?"

"Well, probably not now," Lyn grumbled, looking at the world around her disdainfully.

"So, like, where are we going?" Reneey asked randomly.

"To my house, there are extra guest rooms," Kurama informed Reneey.

"And it's taking this long?" she complained.

Lyn kicked Reneey and muttered, "Real grateful little jerk, aren't you? You could at least say thanks or something..."

"You never said thankies, bitch."

"There's no need, really," Kurama said, sweatdropping.

"AND I'M NOT FUCKING LITTLE!"

Lyn grabbed Reneey's arm to bring her to a stop, and stood up at her full height, which just happened to be right around half a foot greater than Reneey's.

"Not little?" she asked with a smirk.

Reneey sneered as she kicked Lyn in the shin, but walked off with a hmph and a grin.

"We're here," Kurama said, but Reneey kept on walking.

"Um.. Reneey..."

"Just let her alone," Lyn said, rolling her eyes. "She's a city slicker, she'll find her way back when she wants to."

"Is she mad?" Kurama asked. "And she _does_ know it's dangerous out there?"

Lyn laughed. "Yeah, right. Nah, she ain't mad, and as for whether she knows it's dangerous -- I got news for you, hon, she probably knows better than you do. She has seen all the shows and knows what's gonna happen, after all."

"So she should know that demons could be lurking out there," he murmured, looking at Reneey's fading figure.

Eh, I've seen dumber humans, Youko thought.

Lyn's eyebrows twitched up and then back down noncommittedly. "Yeaaah, she can probably tell you their names and life stories. A bit obsessed with the bad guys, Reneey."

Kurama was worried. Even though he had only met these girls ten minutes earlier, he had a soft heart and cared for many people. "Well," he said, unlocking the door, "let's go inside and I'll show you your room."

Lyn shrugged and followed him, pulling her cell phone out of her pocket as she did so.

_Kurama or however the heck you spell his name is freaking because he thinks you're gonna get eaten by demons or something._

She sent the message to Reneey and flipped her phone shut again, but didn't put it back in her pocket just yet. It wasn't like she was going to admit that she didn't want anything to happen to Reneey, either.

Meanwhile, Reneey was wandering around and hoping to meet Hiei when a beeping noise came from her cell. She opened it, read the message, and wrote back:

_Ai, he cares too much, but its sooo hot well im...somewhere...looking for hiei or other hot ass demons_

Lyn actually laughed when she got the text, and Kurama gave her a strange look that she didn't notice, because she was too busy muttering "Naturally," and texting back.

_Oi, you do realize it's not a good plan to go LOOKING for demons, right? Regardless of how hot they are?_

_But Hiei doesnt stay all evil. He just evil in the begingin!_

Reneey sent that text back to Lyn and muttered, "Wonder if Crowie is here...?"

Then she accidentally bumped into someone, looked up, and stared into a pair of indigo eyes. I swear I've seen those eyes before, she thought slowly.

"Sorry."

"Nah, my fault. Me ish Reneey or Rea."

---

Lyn whacked herself in the forehead when she got Reneey's text and replied quickly.

_Idget, this IS the beginning! Or did you forget that in your hurry to find hot demons?_

---

"I'm Rub. Are you sure you're all right?"

"Yeah! Trust me, I've been through worse --"

She was cut off by a beep and muttered, Hold on..."

She took out the cell and texted back quickly:

Hot guy leave me byeee 2

Then she sent the message and turned her cell off.

"So what are you doing here?" Rub asked.

"That's.. a funny story."

---

"Idget and a half!" Lyn yelled incredulously when she got Reneey's text and had to resist a desire to throw the phone against the wall. Instead, she contented herself with shoving it back into her pocket with unnecessary force and turning to walk back out the door, only to walk straight into Kurama.

"Sorry, dude," she said distractedly, "only I gotta go find Rea before she spills the beans..."

"What happened?" Kurama asked.

"She texted me back and said something about a hot guy and to leave her alone. Knowing her, a hot guy is probably nobody she should be talking to. She couldn't keep her mouth shut if her life depended on it."

_Sounds like most humans,_ Youko thought.

Kurama did a sweatdrop and said, "Well then, I'm coming with you."

Just then it started to rain.

---

"Ah, fuck," Reneey grumbled. "Rain is no fun when there're no enemies around to splash puddles at them."

Rub laughed. "Here, don't want you to catch a cold."

And he gave her his jacket, but hanging on his neck was a necklace with a blood red pendant.

Reneey's mouth hung open.

"You like?" Rub asked.

Reneey grinned and announced, "Ya Kuroune who pulled a Youko!"

Rub blinked, and his voice changed. "Are you a demon? I don't sense any demonic energy from you."

"Oh, me human, I'll tell ya later."

"What do you mean by pulled a Youko?" he asked with narrowed eyes.

"Oh ya see --"

"Reneey, don't you dare tell anybody anything!" Lyn shouted as she and Kurama ran up.

"Oh, hi Lyn! Hi Kurama! This is Kuroune!"

"KUROUNE!?"

"KURAMA!?"

"Shhh, you have to say Suiichi!" Reneey said in a harsh voice that made Lyn smack her upside the head.


	3. Chapter 3

"Look, that's not Kuroune!" Kurama objected, and at the same time, Kuroune yelled, "That's not Kurama!"

"Shh, say Suiichi!"

Lyn planted her palm in the middle of her forehead and demanded, "Don't we have someplace where y'all can have this conversation where we're NOT IN THE RAIN? And maybe where people aren't staring like we've just announced we're from another planet?"

"Yeah, my house is just around the block," Kuroune said, not taking his eyes off Kurama. The same was with Kurama -- they might have challenged each other to a staring contest. They walked to Kuroune's house, and Kuroune -- or _Rub_ -- unlocked the door and went in.

"Now explain."

"That'll be Reneey's job," Lyn said with a sigh, sitting down cross-legged on the floor and staring up at the ceiling disinterestedly.

Kurama and Kuroune turned to Reneey, who grinned and said, "Ya know, Kuro, you look so much hotter in demon form than human form."

Everybody did a face-fall -- well, except Lyn, who just banged her head back against the wall.

"I don't think he cares, Rea," she said blandly, crossing her arms and resisting the urge to whack Reneey upside the head again.

"I'm.. honored, I guess.. but explain!"

"Do you have chocolate?" Reneey asked suddenly.

"Why does that matter?"

"Do you have it or not?"

"Yes."

"Can I have some?"

"RENEEY!" Lyn exploded, looking down from the ceiling and glaring at Reneey with fire in her eyes.

"Okay, okay! Anyway.. ya people are all in a TV show, and how I know you is 'cause you were in the movie! You're said to die, but how you came back is...?"

She stopped to let the blinking bat demon digest this information, and he asked slowly, "A.. TV.. show?"

Lyn sighed, closed her eyes tightly, and banged her head against the wall again.

"But how is _that_ --" he paused to point a figure at Kurama -- "Youko?"

Reneey looked at Kurama, who looked like he was about to say something, but then gold covered his green eyes and silver swept away the red in his hair.

"Hey!" Reneey objected, grinning. "You don't transform till dark tournament! How? Eh, evs..."

"My dear friend," Youko's voice said, "I was killed by a hunter --"

"SDF!" Reneey interrupted, and she grinned as Youko looked at her.

"SDF... but I managed to escape by putting my soul into a human baby."

"So it is you," Kuroune said disbelievingly.

"Lynni.. confront yaoi time!" Reneey whispered to Lyn.

Lyn blinked. "Er.. in English?"

"Boy on boy!"

The two thieves hugged each other, and Reneey smiled at Lyn and asked, "Aww, Lynni, ain't it cute?"

But they broke apart, and Kuroune asked, "So who are you?"

"Me Rea, her Lyn."

"Really long, really complicated story," Lyn said with a sigh. "And if I have to tell you, I'll probably wind up killing Rea for picking Yu Yu Hakusho instead of Yu-Gi-Oh."

"Oh, yeah, I need to hide somewhere," Reneey realized. "Lynni, give me like.. a thirty minute head start."

"Thirty minutes?" Youko asked.

"What? I'm lazy."

"And horrible at hiding," Lyn added, rolling her eyes. "I could give you three hours and still find you in two minutes."

"I'll take you on, bitch," Reneey snapped in a friendly way.

"And you'll die a painful death," Lyn muttered in an offhand sort of way as she examined the fingernail she had squashed in a door earlier.

"So you wanted to see me?" Youko asked, turning to Reneey.

"Oh, right."

Instantly there was a scream: "YOUKO KURAMA! OMFG!" And a very obsessed thirteen-year-old bear hugged Youko.

Kuroune fell over laughing.

Lyn shook her head and asked wryly, "You realize you're obsessed out of your mind, right?"

Youko was wide-eyed as he got bear hugged by a thirteen-year-old, but he managed to keep from falling.

"OMFG?" he asked questioningly.

"Oh my fucking god," Reneey said, grinning.

"Even when she yells random letters they usually stand for curses," Lyn added, shaking her head.

"Right, so why did you just bear hug me?" Youko asked with raised eyebrows.

"'Cuz she's an obsessed fangirl," Lyn answered once again.

"Yeapi yeap!"

Youko shook his head. "Ya know, this is the first time I've ever been bear hugged by a thirteen-year-old human girl."

"So what's ya point?" Reneey asked with blinking eyes.

"Nothing, nothing..."

Lyn sighed and muttered, "And, naturally, she couldn't pick Yu-Gi-Oh.. where I could be randomly bear hugging Seto right now.. he looks so cute when he's completely confused," she added with an impish grin, absently fingering the silver cross around her neck.

"Who's Seto?" Kuroune asked while wiping away tears of laughter. "And Yu-Gi-Oh?"

"This dude and this anime show," Reneey answered as she finally let go of Youko.

"This totally _hot_ dude on this anime show," Lyn sighed forlornly.

"Bakura's more hotter, and good Marik is, too."

"Marik is _blond_," Lyn objected again, rolling her eyes.

"Who are they?" Youko asked.

"These hot-ass dudes," Reneey answered, "but when Marik goes all evil evil, he looks anorexic."

"Um.. okaay..."

"I want chocolate," Lyn and Reneey suddenly said together.

"I have some chocolate," Kuroune said, and he went to the kitchen, leaving behind a fox demon and two human girls.

"Hi!" Reneey waved to Youko, who waved back with a questioning look. "Wazzz up!?"

"Oi," Lyn muttered, shaking her head. "Wait, since we're here, does that mean we're here for, like, the whole show? Because I do not take well to fourteen-year-old perverted creeps who die four or five times in the run of a hundred-some-odd-episode show."

"He dies four times, 112 episodes."

"Who does?"

"Yusuke."

"You mean that person who died in that car accident?" Youko asked, remembering Shuiichi watching the news where it told about Yusuke's death.

"Yeah, but he comes back."

"How?"

"Ya see."

"Back!" Kuroune announced, returning with the chocolate, which he had to throw to avoid being trampled to the ground by two very chocolate-obsessed girls.

"So, dear old friend, how did you come back?" Youko asked as the girls were busy fighting over the last piece of chocolate.

"Well, actually, to tell the truth..." Kuroune paused and rubbed the back of his head. "I don't remember."

He grinned as Youko did a face-fall.

"All I remember was this figure and the next thing I knew, I woke up in this house. After time passed, I learned to make a human form, which wasn't easy..."

Youko sighed and said, "Well, at least you're back."

"OOO is YK&K legacy coming back!?" Reneey asked.

"YK&K?" Kuroune asked, blinking.

"Youko Kurama and Kuroune! Ya people going back to being thieves?"

Youko looked at Kurama who looked back at Youko.

"But really.. it was fun and great, but I really don't want to lose a friend just by a heist gone wrong," Youko answered.

"Same, it just got.. not.. fun, I guess," Kuroune added.

"Who the crap cares about YK&K?" Lyn whined. "I wanna see SK & KC! And get outta here before the perv wakes up!"

"Seto Kaiba, and who is KC? I don't know."

Reneey looked at Lyn, who rolled her eyes and said, "It's only written on everything he wears. Kaiba Corp! Duh!"

"I gotta go, Hiei's calling," Youko said, transforming back into Kurama.

"OO, I always wanted to meet Hiei and that other dude whose name I keep on forgetting!"

"Reneey, you can't go, you'll get killed."

Reneey blinked at him. "And...?"

"And if you get killed I'm stuck here with dudes I don't know and the pervert!" Lyn said exasperatedly.

"You can stay here if you want," Kuroune offered. "There are many guest rooms."

"But I wanna meet Hiei!" Reneey pouted.

"Don't worry, Kurama," Lyn said, rolling her eyes, "she'll be over it in ten seconds flat."

"Right," Kurama said a little doubtfully. "Well, bye..."


	4. Chapter 4

Reneey was pouting with her arms crossed. "I wanna meet Hiei..."

"Who's Hiei?" Kuroune asked, by now having changed back to his demon form.

"Yet another demon," Lyn sighed from her place leaning against the wall. "Aren't Reneey's demon obsessions just _grand_?" she added sarcastically.

"Demon obsession?" Kuroune asked with raised eyebrows.

"He's totally hot!" Reneey said, twirling around. "And his demon form is like green skin with purple eyes all over! And there's this other demon whose name I can't pronounce.. or remember.. but he's not hot at all."

Lyn heaved a sigh, rested her head against the wall, and closed her eyes. "WHY did you have to pick this show?" she questioned again. "It's BORING! And if we don't get out of here soon, we're bound to meet up with the retarded dead pervert..."

"IT'S NOT BORING!" Reneey snapped so loudly that it made Kuroune jump.

"Hello, bat demon here! Sensitive ears!"

"Hi!" Reneey waved at Kuroune, then yelled again, "IT'S NOT FUCKING BORING!"

Lyn shook her head sadly at Kuroune and said, "If you have sensitive ears, you'd best stay as far as possible away from Reneey. She WILL burst your eardrums, or at least give you a killer headache."

Then she tuned a frown to Reneey and asked, "So what do you call a show where the most interesting thing that's happened so far is some idget who rides an _oar_ of all things shows up to bring a retarded pervert back from the dead? I mean, I'd let him stay dead if it were me. But maybe I'm just ticked at perverts after the moron Marine wannabe decided to walk into the bathroom while I was in the shower..."

"We have to wait till we get there! DUH!"

This time Kuroune moved far away, holding his ears. "Who's the Marine?"

"This dude," Reneey answered.

"This pervert," Lyn corrected her darkly. "Blame peeping Tom, if you ask me..."

Kuroune smirked. He remembered times when he was a "peeping Tom" himself.

"I'm hungryyyyy!"

"You're ALWAYS hungry," Lyn grumbled. "I am not hungry, but I _do_ seriously need TEA. Or else I shall go into caffeine and sugar withdrawal and kill all of humanity. Beginning with pervs."

"Nutty went on a sugar withdrawal and killed everybody!" Reneey announced.

"Err, well, I have pizza and tea.. not sure I have nutty," Kuroune said slowly, looking at Reneey's grin.

As he left to prepare food, Reneey turned to Lyn. "Let's explore his house!"

Lyn raised an eyebrow dubiously. "Do you honestly think that's the best plan? Anyway, I. Need. Tea. And nobody else makes tea like I like it best, my tea totally pones everybody else's. Strong enough to walk by itself," she added with a grin.

"Fine then, you go help Kuroune and I'll explore his house!" Reneey said as she pushed Lyn toward the kitchen door.

"Oh, for the love of Seto Kaiba!" Lyn growled, shoving Reneey back. "You seriously think I'm gonna let you go _anywhere_ by yourself? Especially after you randomly walked into a demon the last time?"

"But it wasn't just any demon, it was Kuroune!"

"I heard my name?" he asked as he walked back out of the kitchen with a tray of food. "What's up?"

Lyn smirked. "You probably just saved your house from getting ransacked by a sugar-crazed thirteen-year-old is all."

"Hey! I'm not sugar high!"

"You're _always_ sugar high."

"If you want a tour of the house, just ask."

"Really?" Sparkles filled Reneey's eyes.

"Yea --"

But before he could finish, Reneey ran up the stairs leaving flying dust behind her.

Lyn shook her head. "Yeaaah," she said slowly, "You'd probably better go make sure she doesn't burn the place down."

Just then -- CRASH, followed by: "SHIT! Not my fault!"

Kuroune did a sweatdrop. "Maybe I never should've done that..."

"Yeah," Lyn agreed, patting him on the shoulder. "Don't worry, you'll learn."

Kuroune twitched. "I'm older than you, so you should be the one learning!"

Just then Reneey came down with pieces of glass in her hair and a grin on her face. "Ya house despises me..."

Lyn just smirked at Kuroune. "See, _I_ knew that would happen. Anyway, you'll get used to the fact that I know stuff even though I'm just sixteen. Everybody in my class was two years older than me, because I skipped twice, and they all did."

She shrugged and began to carefully pick the glass out of Reneey's hair, wondering how on earth she had managed to break something without slicing herself to pieces.

Rea moved away and demanded, "Backi awayi fromi mei glassi hair!"

"Glassi.. hairi? You added i after each word?"

"Yeapi Kurouni!"

Kuroune twitched. "Don't. Call. Me. Kurouni."

Lyn shook her head. "Trust me, dude -- TAKE IT. My cousins made the mistake of not letting her call them their real name with an i at the end..." Then she shuddered and added, "What she came up with next was SO much worse."

"Oh come ON! How are D1, D2, and D3 horrible!?" Reneey pouted.

"They sound like numbers on a jukebox," Lyn said, shaking her head.

"Shit, I gotta go to school," Kuroune mumbled.

"Ooh, can we come!?" Reneey asked, jumping up and down.

"NO WAY!" Lyn objected at once. "I escaped from school last month, I am SO not going back until I start college in the fall!"

"But you're sixteen!" Kuroune objected. "And I don't see why you can't come, all you need is a uniform..."

"NO UNIFORMS!"

"SENSITIVE EARS!"

"I skipped two grades," Lyn grumbled, "which I believe I already mentioned. I graduated, thank you very much. And why the crap would I agree to wear one of those skimpy things that pass for uniforms around here? I'd be more covered up in a bath towel!"

"Well, then, you can't come."

"Oh, fine! We'll just stay here," Reneey said, putting on a fake angry look.

"I can tell if you're sneaking or not, Reneey, do NOT try anything," Kuroune warned as his human form came back.

"Psh, good luck getting her to keep THAT bargain," Lyn scoffed, leaning against the wall again.

He just shook his head and left his house, locking the door behind him. Then, after five minutes or so --

"Hey Lynni! Sneaki ini?"

"Sneak in where?" Lyn asked, looking confused. "Don't you mean sneak _out_?"

"Yeah, I totally meant that, but if I say outie it would sound wrong... So what do ya say?" Reneey asked with hopeful eyes.

"Um.. I say..." She paused and then asked, "Wait, why does outie sound wrong? It sounds like somebody's bellybutton, or at least it does to me."

"Yeah, but if ya were my friend, ya would know what I would mean by bellybutton," Reneey said, grinning. "So, wanna go?"

Lyn made a face. "Jeez, can we _not_ play the find-something-perverted-in-everything-anyone-says game right now? It's creepy enough when I'm sitting in my own house as opposed to the home of some random dude who I've never met in my life and is frankly a little creepy..."

Reneey giggled. "So, is it a yes or no? I really wanna annoy some random people, it's really fun. Come on, please!"

Lyn grimaced and groaned, "Rea, give me one good reason that I should go gallavanting around a city I've never even seen before when there are perverts and crazy people and demons on the loose just because you're bored? Why can't you just annoy me like you usually do? Or, I dunno, NOT have picked Yu Yu Hakusho out of all the perfectly good television shows out there..."

"Hey, this one is a perfectly good TV show! You just hate it 'cause you never saw it! Anyway, fine! _You_ stay here, I'm going."

She turned to open the door, but it wouldn't budge.

"What the hell!?" she demanded, obviously having forgotten that Kuroune had locked the door. "Crap! Lynni! Doors are revolting!"

"I think phones and TVs are revolting," Lyn muttered darkly, leaning back against the wall.

"Goddamn it, Lynni! Help!"

Reneey tried to open the door with all her force; she even tried kicking it.

Lyn just shook her head and murmured, "Idget..."


	5. Chapter 5

"The door's _locked_, Reneey," Lyn said exasperatedly.

"FUCK! You could've told me sooner!"

Before Lyn had said that, Reneey had punched the door a bit too hard than she had intended to and her hand was beet red.

"Owie.. crap.. stupid door!" she growled, kicking it again. "SHIT! This door wants to kill me, I swear."

"Maybe it wouldn't if you didn't keep trying to break it down," Lyn said dryly.

"Well, why don't you give it a try, then?" Reneey snapped. "See if you could do better!"

Lyn rolled her eyes, crossed the room, and slid back the padlock which had been above Reneey's head and which she hadn't noticed. "That might help," she said with a smirk.

"Oh.. um.. I knew that was there the whole time!" Reneey said, her eyes moving back and forth. "I was.. testing ya.. seeing abilities! Yeah, that's the one!"

Lyn scoffed and murmured, "Yeah, and I'm the Queen of England..."

"LET'S GO!" Reneey yelled, grabbing Lyn's hand and making a run for it.

"Hold it!" Lyn objected with a raised eyebrow. "Where is exactly _is_ this school?"

"IDK! But we shuold find it!" Reneey said, dragging Lyn outside. "Now.. where do we go? Oh, let's ask someone! Good plan, right, Lyn?"

"School's already started," Lyn objected as Reneey ran off. "Random people on the street won't know!"

But Reneey went around asking random people anyway. All she got were random looks and blinks from them, and so she came back, pouting.

"They are fuckers."

"Or they just don't know what you're talking about," Lyn said, rolling her eyes.

Reneey growled, "We will find that school!" She looked around, pointed to a random object, and yelled, "There! That's a school!"

She skipped to it, and Lyn whacked herself in the forehead. "That's a bus stop, Rea," she said exasperatedly.

"Oh really? Well... there's a school behind it!" she announced, and then ran to it. But, BUMP! She collided with someone.

"Oh, fuck, sorry! Totally not me fault!"

"Hehehe, no problem," said the girl Reneey bumped into.

"Hey, ya Botan!"

"RENEEY!" Lyn yelled, whacking Reneey upside the head. "Didn't we have a little talk about not announcing the names of random people you aren't supposed to know about yet...?"

The blue-haired girl binked and asked, "Do I know you? Oh, but it's a pleasure to meet you!"

She grinned and Reneey announced, "I'm Reneey and this is Lyn! Oh, and I know you by -- OW, BITCH!"

Lyn had whacked her upside the head again.

: "Whatcha do that for!?" Reneey pouted. "Whatever happened ta no violence!?"

"Like I ever agreed to that," Lyn muttered, and Botan blinked and asked, "How do you know me?"

"Well, I was gonna tell ya until Ms. Murder there tried ta kill me! Me her bffl! I feel so betrayed! I'm not gonna talk ta ya for ten seconds!"

"Be careful not to explode," Lyn said with a sigh and a smile.

"Anyway, Botan, I know ya beacuse ya a TV show! Like we know all of what's gonna happen.. well.. I know..."

"Reneey and Lyn? Those names sound.. familiar.. I swear I've heard them before, by Koenma, sir," Botan mumbled.

"Oh, Lynni! Ya hear that! What if like.. we're like.. here! Like.. yeah.. I don't know where I'm going with this..."

Lyn blinked at her and stated simply, "That was only eight seconds."

"Was not!" Reneey objected.

"Psh, I have this awesome thing called a watch, Rea..."

"Mmm, I must take you to Koenma, he would know what to do!" Botan said, and held her hand out, and an oar appeared. "Grab on tight!"

"Why the crap would I want to go with you, exactly?" Lyn asked with a frown.

"Because of this!" Reneey grinned as she grabbed Lyn's wrist and dragged her to Botan's oar. She grabbed onto it and they left.

"WHEEEE AIN'T THIS AWESOME!?" Reneey screamed.

"Again with the stupid stereotypical girly screaming," Lyn said with a sigh.

"Oh, screw the fucking stereotype screamy girl thing! Oooh, there's the river sphyix thing!"

"Styx," Lyn said blandly. "It's from Greek mythology. And are we almost there yet?"

"Yeap! Just ahead!"

Finally they got in there, the doors opened, and they walked in only to see random ogres working all around.

"Ya know," Reneey mumbled, "They must've thought working for death was actually easy..."

"And a person just died now," Lyn murmured as they went to Koenma's office.

"What do you want!? I'm busy here!" Koenma snapped behind the piles of paper on his desk.

"Um, Koenma, sit.. I have something to tell you," Botan said.

"Yeah, what is it?" He looked up then screamed, "BOTAN! WHY DID YOU BRING THE THIEVES' DAUGHTERS HERE!?"

"The what!?" Lyn demanded.

"Who?" Reneey blinked. "I mean, Yomi used to be a thief, Youko used to be a thief, Kuroune used to be a thief, Hiei used to be a thief -- WHICH THIEF!?"


	6. Chapter 6

**6. Bratty Brat Said So**

"What in the name of Seto Kaiba are you yammering on about?" Lyn demanded, glaring at Koenma. "My dad's not a thief, you jerk! He's a redneck and an epileptic and even an idget sometimes, but he's not a thief!"

"Huh?" Botan asked, blinking.

"WHICH THIEF!?" Reneey yelled.

"No, no, no," Koenma said impatiently, shaking his head. "You two are the daughters of Kuroune and Youko!"

"Oh!" Reneey said, grinning. "Well, why didn't you say so in the beginning!?"

Lyn blinked and then shook her head. "You know," she said blandly, "I've never seen this dadburned show or anything, but I've read some of the eipsode recaps, and I don't ever remember reading that dude here's a retarded idget."

"Okay, Lynni," Reneey said, turning to Lyn, "Youko Kurama is.. well, used to be King of Thieves, while Kuroune is.. well, used to -- well, is, whatever! His partner!"

Lyn twitched and promptly whacked Reneey upside the head. "I KNOW THIS, YOU IDGET!" she yelled. "But what does that have to do with the price of eggs in China!?"

"There's a price on eggs in China?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Koenma sighed and said, "Let me call in Kurama."

"And Kuroune!" Reneey added, grinning.

"He's dead," Koenma said slowly.

"NOT UH!" Reneey screeched.

Lyn promptly kicked her hard and gave her a 'What-the-crap-are-you-thinking?' look.

"Bratty brat, give us.. like.. ten minutes!"

Reneey ran for the door, dragging Lyn behind her.

"Ten minutes for what? AND DON'T CALL ME BRATTY BRAT!"

"What the CRAP is going on?" Lyn sighed exasperatedly once they were out of earshot. "And why are you telling jerkface in there that Kuroune's alive, exactly?"

"So, we can figure this out! And who knows! Ya might be Kuroune's daughter, and I might be Youko's!"

Reneey grinned as she dragged Lyn through a huge door and into a portal that would take them back to the human world to where they were before Botan showed up.

"Okay, it's 2:55... school ends at three.. Lyn, ya remember where his house was?"

"Well, yeah, but -- seriously, Reneey, you're buying this crap?"

"Ya betcha ass I am!" Reneey giggled. "Besides, then I can annoy whoever my dad is! NOW LET'S GO!"

"Reneey? Lyn?" Kurama -- er, I mean Suiichi -- said as he saw the girls.

"Oh! I have something to tell ya!" Reneey began.

Lyn promptly groaned and banged her head against the nearest wall.

Kurama -- wait, I mean Suiichi -- blinked.

"Reneey," Lyn grumbled, "I really think we should go somewhere where there are no people around..."

"You -- well, Youko and Kuroune are our dads!" Reneey announced, grinning and not listening to a word Lyn said.

"WHAT?"

Lyn just banged her head all the harder.

"Reneey? Lyn? Didn't I tell you girls to stay at the house?" Kuroune -- or, um, Rub asked with raised eyebrows.

Reneey turned to him and announced, "Oh, you and Youko are our dads!"

Kuroune choked on the water he was drinking. "WHAT!?"

"Bratty brat said so," Reneey announced, smiling.


	7. Chapter 7

**7. Someone's In Denial**

"Reneey, you can't go up to random people on the street and say that kind of thing!" Lyn said reprovingly, whacking Reneey upside the head.

"Ow! That hurt!" Reneey pouted, rubbing her head.

Kuroune -- or Rub -- sighed. "Back to my huose? Which is where you two should be...?"

"Well, actually, we should be going back to Bratty Brat," Reneey said.

"Bratty Brat?" Kurama asked with a raised eyebrow.

"No," Lyn corrected, fighting a monster headache and a sudden urge to punch the next person who raised their voice, "We _should_ be going _home_..."

"But I wanna go --"

However, before Reneey could finish her sentence, Lyn whacked her upside the head not once, not twice, but three times.

"WE ARE NOT GOING BACK SO YOU CAN LET IT SLIP TO THE IDGETS THAT KUROUNE IS STILL ALIVE, DADBURN IT!"

"Fine! I think you destroyed the last of my brain cells..."

"Wait, what?" Kuroune asked, blinking.

"Oh, he's not gonna do shit to ya, Rub," Reneey said, grinning. "Besides, he doesn't even know Youko's powers, and I do.. which is sad..."

"Wait, he doesn't know?" Kurama blinked. "I thought he would..."

"He doesn't," Reneey said, shrugging.

"THAT'S IT! I AM NOT TAKING PART IN A RANDOM, SOMEWHAT RETARDED, AND PROBABLY COMPLETELY FABRICATED CONVERSATION IN THE MIDDLE OF A CROWDED SIDEWALK!"

And Lyn promptly turned and stalked off in a random direction.

"Well, let's go," Reneey said, skipping after Lyn. Kuroune and Kurama blinked and followed the two girls.

_Five minutes later_

They had finally made it to Kuroune's -- or Rub's -- house. Kuroune sweatdropped at the marks that Reneey had left on the door from earlier.

"Just don't ask," Lyn said, shaking her already pounding head.

"So does anyone know about this?" Kurama asked.

"Oooh!" Reneey raised her hand and jumped around, and Lyn winced and started massaging her temples.

"Um, I pick you," Kurama said.

"Mk, well, in every fanfic in the world -- well, with Yu Yu Hakusho -- back when you and Kuroune were thieves, you pretty much had daughters that were off-screen because the movie only showed one part of ya past, so anyway they must have died, like, somehow, probably after Kuro supposedly died and after you got shot from that SDF, the daughters must have died and went into bodies like ours!" Reneey said all in one breath. "You try saying that with a Russian accent..."

"I only have a Southern accent and I probably couldn't say that," Lyn said, leaning against a wall and still trying to rid herself of the headache. "Not that I know what the crap it means.. or care, for that matter..."

"Well, I did feel _something_ coming from you girls.. it was faint, but still there," Kuroune said slowly.

"So whose dad is who?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Just then there was a puff of smoke and.. out popped Koenma!

"That's right!" he said, looking at Reneey. "But how did you know!? And how are you alive?" he added, switching his gaze to Kuroune, who had changed back to demon form.

"Reneey," Lyn said exasperatedly.

"I didn't do it!" Reneey said.

Lyn screwed her eyes closed and made a faint sort of almost whining sound under her breath and banged her head against the wall again. Maybe if she hit it hard enough, she'd wake up and be back home! ... Maybe with a concussion... but whatever, that was better than nothing...

"So, explain?" Kurama asked Koenma, who cleared this throat.

"Exactly what Reneey said -- and Youko is Reneey's father and Kuroune is Lyn's."

"Awesomely awesome!" Reneey said, grinning. "So I get to have cute fox ears! ... I hope they're pink..."

"Oh, and Kuroune -- How. Are. You. Alive?" Koenma put an emphasis on it this time.

"Um.. well.. I really don't know, to tell the truth," Kuroune said, grinning.

Koenma did a face fal. "How do you konw know!?"

So Kuroune told the story all over again, and Koenma nodded his head. Finally he sad, "Well, then, I'll be off." And so he left.

Reneey blinked. "He is even more stupider than in the show!"

"What do you mean?" Kurama asked.

"Hello, you have the moon.. thing... Hope and you stole it... and you're with Hiei and that other dude and Koenma just, like, left!"

Kurama shrugged. "I always did think he was a bit of an idiot back in the day," he said, voice changing to Youko's.

Kuroune grinned. "Yeah. It took him more than a hundred years to catch us!"

Lyn glared at them all. "What the crap is so funny?" she demanded. "Why is everybody just buying this? Give me one good reason that I should believe some moron who knows less about what's going on in his own world than somebody who just showed up here!"

"Because it's in every single fanfic I've ever read," Reneey said, grinning. "... Oh, and you're growing wings, too, by the way."

"WHAT!?" Lyn yelled, looking around -- and there behind her were wings just like Kuroune's, indigo and blue; and as she stared at them, her ears changed to bats' ears.

"Damn, I guess he wasn't lying," Kuroune said, blinking.

"Do I have pink ears!?" Reneey shouted.

Lyn switched her gaze to her friend, and her eyes widened. Reneey had two fox ears on top of her head, and also a tail, both of which were silver.

"Reneey, I'm a silver fox, not a pink one," Youko said, sweatdropping.

"Aww! Would ya let me dye them pink?"

"No!"

"Spray paint?"

"No!"

"Color them with markers?"

"No!"

"Crayons?"

"No!"

"Colored pencils?"

"No!"

"Sharpies?"

"NO!"

"Glue pink sparkles on them?"

"For the last time, NO!"

Lyn just stood there blinking at them both. As Reneey glared at Youko, Lyn shook her head and muttered, "Right... I'm.. dreaming! Yes, that's it! Only possible explanation! There was.. a.. blackout! Yeah, there was a blackout and I hit my head on something and now I'm having a really freaky, concussion-induced dream. It even explains my headache!"

Reneey sweatdropped. "Someone's in denial..."


	8. Chapter 8

**8. Names and No Answers**

"I'm not in denial," Lyn said, crossing her arms. "I'm being _rational_. It's not like any of this crap makes sense or anything."

"Come on, how could you not believe it? I mean, if it weren't for your being a giel, you'd be the spitting image of ya dad! And ya eyes are indigo, too!" Reneey said, grinning.

"Lyn, I really think Reneey is right," Kuroune put in. "You do look just like me."

"I do not!" Lyn objected. "Whatever the crap you're talking about, it isn't me. I look like my _mother_, loathe though I usually am to admit it. Jeez, Reneey, _you_ even said so when you finally met her, and I about knocked your block off for it, remember!?"

Okay, so maybe she _was_ in denial. But Lyn was used to things being logical, predictable, and making perfect sense. And, dadburn it, this didn't make any sense at all!

"Kuro, do you have a mirror?" Reneey sighed.

Kuroune nodded and got it and made to give it to Reneey, but Lyn rolled her eyes and broke in, "Do you not remember the breaking glass incident when she went upstairs...?"

Reneey pouted, but Kuroune took a hint and held the mirror out to Lyn.

"Ya see, Lynni?" Reneey asked. "You have the eyes, the wings, the ears -- hello! ... Anyway, I shall leave you to a father-daugher moment. Come on, Daddy!"

Reneey took Youko's hand and ran off, draggong him behind.

"Wait -- Reneey! I have to change first!" Youko objected.

Lyn ignored them and just glared darkly at her reflection. Finally she said quietly, "Just go away." She still didn't look away from the mirror, so Kuroune wasn't entirely sure whether she was talking to him or whether she had lost it and was addressing her own reflection.

"Hey, Lyn.. are you all right?"

Parental skills that hadn't been used in who knows how many years finally kicked in, and Kuroune put the mirror away and walked over to Lyn, gently putting a hand on her shoulder.

She met his rather concerned gaze with a cold look and finally asked, "What do you want?"

Kuroune raised his eyebrows. "_I_ want to know what's wrong -- and _don't. Use. That. Tone. With. Me," _he added, with an emphasis on the last part.

"I'll use whatever tone I want, thank you," Lyn shot back, glaring now. "What, you expect me to listen to you because some retard says you're my father? You have to _earn_ respect, you know -- even moreso because you have the audacity to call yourself my father. And if you knew anything about me at all, you'd know that I don't take well to morons who I see maybe a few times a year, and who know nothing about me or my life, still having the gall to claim me as their daughter."

Kuroune blinked and then blinked again, and then his eyes turned downward. He didn't know why her words hurt -- actually, if she were anyone else, she would probably be dead quicker than she could say sorry -- but this was his daughter, whether Lyn believed it or not.

He pursed his lips. "You're right; I _don't_ know your life. And, really, it's my fault... If I had never gone back to that bamboo trap..."

Then he heaved a sigh and went outside, leaving Lyn alone.

She crossed her arms uncomfortably and stared into a corner. Great, now she felt guilty on top of everything else. But why should she!? She was the one who was having her life screwed up, losing everything she cared about to be dragged into a world she didn't even understand. It wasn't right!

_But it's not right to take it out on other people, either,_ that evil little voice called a conscience reminded her. And, grudgingly, she had to admit that it was right. But did that mean she just had to accept all this!? There wasn't even any proof of anything! ... Well.. except for that stupid mirror...

Tentatively, she crossed the room to where Kuroune had put the mirror down and picked it up. She didn't want to look into it again; she never wanted to see again what she had before. But, at the same time, she knew she had to.

Her reflection hadn't changed. It was more than a little disheartening, really, the realization that she couldn't run from this.. because this was her.

_Back with Reneey and Youko_

"Reneey, I _have_ to chance back!" Youko snapped.

"Ya, you can go out like that! Like, role play, just without the spiritual/demonic energy thing," Reneey said, grinning, as she drug her dad through a forest -- deep, deep into the darkest part of it.

"And why are we here?" Youko asked, raising an eyebrow. "Though I'm not complaining.. but why?"

"'Cuz it's fun," Reneey said simply, still grinning.

_I wonder how Lynni's doing? She's not the type to accept crap like this that fast..._

_Back with Lyn_

Sighing, Lyn fought a sudden urge to throw the mirror across the room just to watch it shatter and returned it to the place she had picked it up from. _Dadburn it, why is this so hard?_ she demanded of herself, clenching her fists and racking her brain for an answer. _It's not like I'm losing the perfect life. It's not exactly easy to be happy when you're not wanted. But I still don't want to believe this at all._

Shaking her head, she muttered, "But I can't escape it... All I _can_ do is face it."

She switched her gaze from a nondescript corner to the door Kuroune had left through. Where _had_ he gone, anyway? After all, whatever else he was, he was also the only one left who could possibly help her figure this out.

Kuroune was walking in a deserted place. It was dark and misty and he loved it -- it was his place to think, from time to time.

_I can't make her call me father, and I can't make her actually believe it.. but I don't want to lose her, either. I lost her once, and I don't want to go through that again..._

He sighed and tipped his head so that his hat covered his eyes.

Lyn sighed. _But how could I go find him when I have wings and pointed ears?_ She poked her wings and felt shivers run down her spine. _Must be sensitive..._

Her wings flapped, which was definitely a funny feeling, and then finally they disappeared, just like that -- POOF!

Lyn blinked. Not just once, twice, or even three times, but four times all in quick succesion. _What.. in the name... of Seto.. Kaiba...?_

Finally she just shook her head and went outside, but locked the door behind her.

_Now, if I were a bat demon, where would I be?_ Then she looked up at the sun, and her eyes widened. _Sunlight! He's a bat demon, he must hate sunlight. So he would be somewhere else.. somewhere dark..._

So Lyn's brow furrowed and she took off.

_Twenty minutes later_

Lyn was drawing near to the abandoned place where Kuroune had been doing his thinking. It was very strange; she felt something grasping her, pulling her.

Kuroune looked up, sensing familiar energy. His eyebrows raised as he asked slowly, "Lyn...?"

A crease appeared between Lyn's eyebrows as she thought she heard someone say her name. It was very faint, and for some reason it had a hint of an echo to it. A little bizarre.. Maybe she was just imagining things, but somehow she didn't think so.

"Lyn?" Kuroune repeated, more loudly; he now knew it was her, his daughter. "What are you doing here? Don't you know it's dangerous!?"

He jumped down from the rock he was standing on and walked up to her, frowning slightly.

"At least the retarded dead pervert isn't here," Lyn said with a shrug. "He and the ugly dude whose name I can't remember or pronounce are the ones who tend to draw danger. Anyway, I'm not completely helpless, you know."

It wasn't exactly her sweetest voice, but at least it wasn't as vicious and biting as before.

"Right," Kuroune said, blinking. "But what are you doing here?"

"Good question," Lyn said, looking around and wrinkling her nose. "This place looks like death, y'know that?"

"I like it here. It's, like, my speical place to go to," Kuroune said with a shrug as he twisted his hands around and the mist wrapped around his fingers.

And it was at some point around that time that Lyn remembered a scene in another anime show with a dark, misty landscape, and she suddenly started to laugh. _It actually would be funny if some dude in a dog suit randomly meandered by..._

"What's so funny?" Kuroune asked with raised eyebrows.

"Nothing," Lyn said, shaking her head. "But I was wrong. It doesn't look like death here -- it looks like a dream sequence."

Kuroune blinked. "Um.. right..."

Lyn's laughter had died now, and she had shifted back into serious mode. Heaving a sigh, she resisted an urge to cross her arms and look away and instead met Kuroune's gaze. "I'm sorry for being a jerk," she said in a low voice.

Kuroune chuckled a bit. "It's quite all right. I really can't blame you much; after all, you do have your mother's temper." He ran his fingers through his hair and added, "And if I've learned anything about women, it's that if they get pissed, run -- fast and far away."

He shuddered a bit from one memory where he had needed twenty stitches...

The crease between Lyn's eyebrows returned, but her gaze softened slightly as she asked in a quiet voice, "What... What was her name?"

"Kasumi," Kuroune answered after a short pause. "She was an elemental bat demon -- which means you inherited her elemental powers. This makes you rare, which is why you should always look back and forth and up and down."

Lyn seemed to ignore the slight overprotective rant at the end, however, and repeated in a murmur, "Kasumi... It's a pretty name."

Then she frowned and said slowly, "But I don't understand. How _can_ all of this be true? How can Reneey and I be demons when they don't even exist where we came from? And if we are who you say we are, how did you and Youko not recognize us until you were told who we are?"

"I really don't know much, either. I died when you were four and Reneey was one, but I have to think that what Reneey said must be true, because Junior said it was and he owns the spirit world, human world, and demon world. Well, really it's his father.. but he's always on vacations... I'm pretty sure Youko will know. Where are Reneey and Youko anyway?"

"I don't know," Lyn said with a sigh. She had thought that talking to Kuroune might provide her with answers, but so far it had done nothing more than confuse her further.

Kuroune then put a hand on her shoulder. "So.. want to start all over?"

_Back to Reneey and Youko_

Youko was trying -- key word, _trying_ -- to teach Reneey how to control her plant powers.

"Reneey, you have to focus!" Youko said as she tried to make a vine out of a blade of grass.

Reneey growled, "Why do I have to do this!?"

"Because I don't want my daughter to be weak!"

Reneey twitched and gave her dad a glare. "So you're calling me weak, jerk-dad-of-the-year?" she snapped as she grass suddenly turned into a sharp vine and lunged at Youko.

Of course, Youko stopped it, but he was more shocked at Reneey, who stomped away.

_Fucking asshole! Doesn't know me for thirteen years and goes off calling me weak!? He has no right!_ Reneey snapped in her mind as she walked out of the forest. She really didn't care that her ears and tail were still showing; if anyone asks, she could just hiss and snap at them. Or just say something about roleplaying.

_Ten minutes later_

Kuroune and Lyn were walking along the sidewalk. Kuroune was back in his human form, and was telling tales of his mate, Lyn's mother -- until...

"Hey, isn't that Reneey?" he asked, pointing.

Lyn blinked. "Reneey?"

"YO, RENEEY! OVER HERE!" Lyn called, a little angrily. Reneey was out in public in her demon form!? What was that girl thinking!?

Reneey growled as she heard someone snap her name in an angry tone. "What do ya want, Lyn? I'm already pissed!" she snapped back.

"What in the name of Seto Kaiba do you think you're doing!?" came the half exasperated reply.

"Venting my anger in an unhealthy but fun way, so fuck off," Reneey yelled in a snappy tone.

Kuroune laughed. "Youko always managed to piss Reneey's mother off, too.. It was quite funny to see the great Youko Kurama running from his own mate."

"What happened!?" Lyn yelled back. "And get over here! I don't like the random people staring, they do that enough anyway!"

"Why do I have to move!? Get ya ass over here!"

"Reneey, where you are there are more people! Just get over here!"

"Fine!" Reneey grumbled, and walked over. "Now what the fuck do you want?"

"What happened?" Lyn asked with a sigh.

"Daddy," Reneey said, crossing her arms.

"What did he do?"

Reneey twitched. "Called me something."

Lyn bristled, and her eyes narrowed. "What was it, and how slowly and torturously should I kill him for it?"

"You won't be able to; the only one who could was Ruby, Reneey's mother," Kuroune said with a smirk. Ah, but it would be amusing to see if his daughter could beat the great Youko Kurama...

Lyn just scoffed and growled, "Watch me. Well.. depending on what he said, anyway."

Reneey was silent for a couple of seconds before saying, "He called me weak, and I didn't like that." Then she raised an eyebrow and added, "And people call me a sadist..."

Lyn promptly crossed her arms and gave Reneey a strange look. "All right, who are you and what have you done with the real Reneey Umbra? Because, last I checked, when somebody calls _her_ weak, she gets up in their face and proves them wrong."

"Well. he's my dad.. and.. it, like.. changse... and stuff... and I got mad... and that grass, like, turned into a vine and, like... lunged at him.. like yeah..." Reneey murmured, fidgeting.

"Where is that girl!?" was heard from somewhere not so far away. "I swear, when I find her, if she's okay, I'm going to kill her!"

"Er, I think your dad's here, Reneey," Kuroune said, blinking.

"IRINA KURAMA UMBRA! WHERE ARE YOU!?"

Reneey hid behind Lyn. "Save me?"

And, as usual, Lyn growled and leapt to her friend's defense. "Probably hiding from the jerk who thinks she's four and helpless!" she shot in the general direction that the shouting had been coming from.

"What? Lyn? You tell me where Reneey is right now! Doesn't she know how dangerous it is to be out here in her demon form!?" Youko demanded as he appeared.

Normally, if it were any other person, Reneey would go ballistic. But this was her dad, and it just.. changed things.

"AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU DADBURNED HYPOCRITE!?" Lyn demanded with fire in her gaze.

"Well... I can protect myself! She can't!" Youko snapped.

"Youko, calm down," Kuroune said as he sweatdropped.

"WHAT IS IT WITH YOU MORONS AND THINKING THAT WE'RE SO DADGUM HELPLESS!?"

"We don't think that you're helpless, we just don't want to lose you again, or for you to get hurt like last time! That's why I'm being so tough!" Youko snapped yet again.

"Um... I should start running now, shouldn't I?" Reneey whispered to Lyn and Kuroune.

"No," Lyn growled, "I should start rearranging his face..."

"Lyn, calm down," Kuroune said firmly before turning to Youko.

"And you, too! Can't you see you're scaring your own daughter!?"

Youko took a deep breath and mentally counted to ten. "I apologize that I snapped at you, Lyn."

"Like I care. Apologize to _Reneey_ or I'll break your face."

"Wait, why should I be sorry!? I'm just telling the truth! She needs protection, and I can't always protect her!"

"Youko," Kuroune said in a warning tone, and Youko sent him a death glare that would make Hiei stop his own death glare.

Lyn just sighed and cracked her neck. "Fine. Face breaking time, it is."

Youko laughed. "Like you can actually take me on, little one. But then again, we are in a public place.. So, Reneey, my dearest daughter, I apologize."

Reneey stepped away from Lyn, her ears down. "Um.. accepted?"

"I'm not little, you effing jerk..."

Reneey asked slowly, "So.. now what?"

"Training," Kuroune said, smirking.

"WHAT!?" Lyn and Reneey objected at once.


	9. Chapter 9

**9. Jerks and Comfort**

"I AM NOT EFFING LITTLE!" Lyn thundered. "AND IF YOU DON'T QUIT BEING AN INSULTING, EGOTISTICAL LOUSE, I'M GONNA TEACH YOU THE RULE OF ANIME THAT PROVES WOMEN HIT HARDER THAN VILLAINS!"

Youko blinked. "Louse?"

Then he shook his head. "Well, if you think you can take me on, then go ahead; but not here."

With a snap of his fingers, the surroundings turned into leaves and trees. "This is an illusion that only we can see and feel -- the humans that pass us won't feel or see us," he explained with a smirk.

"Insulting, egotistical, moron, holier-than-thou attitude, and now a show-off," Lyn counted off on her fingers. Then she made a face at Reneey. "Are all guys in this anime either pervs or complete jerks?"

Reneey blinked. "But that's not one of Daddy's attacks.. the hell?" Then she looked at Lyn. "Um.. don't get killed or kill my dad?"

Lyn just rolled her eyes and then said, "No, seriously. _Are_ all guys in this anime pervs or jerks? It's like high school all over again!"

"Daddy's not.. a jerk.. he's.. just.. looking out for us... And I should've seen that..."

Reneey groaned and hit her head against a tree. "Stupid.. guilt.. evil..."

"HEY!" Lyn objected, dragging Reneey away from the tree. "No banging your head on random objects! For the last time, _that's my job_!"

Kuronue blinked. "Wait, wait, wait. You," he pointed at Lyn, "are going to fight your uncle/godfather?"

"And you," he turned to Youko, "are actually going to let her!?"

Lyn blinked. "He's my godfather? The crap? Do y'all never run out of random stuff to come up with?"

"No, he really is your godfather, and I'm Reneey's," Kuronue said to Lyn. Then he turned to Youko with a glare.

"AND YOU'RE ACTUALLY GONNA LET HER!?"

Youko just shrugged. "Well, they _do_ need training."

"Youko!"

"And you _do_ need manners," Lyn shot back at Youko with a glare. "Okay, I'm serious, this time. WHEN DID MANNERS DIE OUT OF ALL THE WORLD EXCEPT FOR ONE LITTLE TOWN IN TENNESSEE!?"

Youko chuckled. "Well, if you think you're so tough, then go ahead. You can have the first move."

"YOUKO!" Kuronue snapped.

"You two bicker like a couple of old maids," Lyn said almost disbelievingly, shaking her head and fighting a random desire to whack them both upside the head. Then she realized something and her eyes widened.

"Ohmygosh! It's the seventh sign of the apocalypse! RENEEY PASSED UP A CHANCE TO YELL WHEN SOMEBODY ELSE YELLED!"

"Huh? Whatcha mean, Lyn? DON'T IGNORE ME LYNNI! OR I WILL CUT OFF THAT TRIANGLE THING THAT COMES OUT OF YA ANKLES! WHAT'S THAT THING CALLED!?" Reneey yelled. "Okay, it's not really a triangle. But that thing! That's, like, there!"

Lyn blinked. "Triangle thing? The crap?"

"On ya ankle! There's this bulgy thing that popped out! Ignore me and I'll cut it off!"

Lyn was now wearing a look appropriate to having been slapped upside the head. "Triangle thing.. that pops out of my ankle," she said, blinking. "What, my anklebone? The crap have you been smoking?"

"The ankleas! What's the thing called, and pronounced like? The aklaeas part of the ankle!"

A look of dawning comprehension crossed Lyn's face. "The Achilles tendon! It doesn't bulge out of your ankle, the crap are you talking about? And it sure ain't triangle shaped..."

"Well, whatever! I'll cut it off it you ignore me!"

"Technically that would be cut it _out_..."

"You know," Youko said, sweatdropping, "We've wasted about ten minutes, here. Lyn! Are we sparring or not!?"

Lyn promptly whacked him upside the head. "Idget! Don't interrupt people! That's, like, rule number one of politeness!" Then she smirked and crossed her arms before adding, "If y'all are gonna make us go along with your crap, you're gonna learn _manners_."

Youko twitched, then slapped her upside the head.

"Hey!" Kuronue objected before smacking Youko upside the head. In response, Youko slapped Kuronue upside the head, and Lyn whacked Reneey upside the head for starting this whole thing.

"Ow! What did I do?"

"That's for getting us into this mess," Lyn snapped.

"Hey, don't snap at my daughter!" Youko growled.

And, naturally, Lyn went right back on the offensive all over again. "Oh, yeah -- that's your job, ain't it, jerk?"

Reneey gaped. "Wait, you people are actually serious!?"

Youko rolled his eyes. "Yes, kit, I am serious. And you girls _do_ need training."

"But Lyn!" Reneey objected, turning to her friend with wide eyes.

Lyn just shrugged. "I got news for you, pal, you can't make me do anything. And I ain't doing nothing, either, unless you agree to stop being a cotton-picking jerk."

"But Daddy! You can't.. but.. DAD YOU CAN'T DO THIS!"

"Yes, I can! And don't raise your voice at me!"

"Well, don't snap at me!"

"Don't snap at _me_!"

"Then stop being jerk-dad-of-the-year!"

Kuronue chuckled. Yes, this was more fun to watch than cable.

"WOULD YOU STOP BEING A JERK-FACED IMBECILE FOR TEN DAGBLAME SECONDS!?" Lyn demanded, glaring at Youko. "I'm the only one who's allowed to blow up at Reneey, dadburn it!"

"NO FIGHTING!" Reneey yelled, but she was ignored as Youko took out his rose whip.

"DADDY!"

"YOUKO!" Kuroune yelled at the same time as Reneey did.

"Do you honestly think that I would really hurt my goddaughter?" Youko asked, rolling his eyes. Then he turned to Lyn and said, "You still have the first hit, you know."

"Tough luck," Lyn said, shrugging. "I'm not gonna. I'm telling you, I'm not going along with this so long as you're acting like a jerk."

"So then what was the point of this!?" Youko demanded, doing a face fall.

Lyn smirked. "To make you stop being a jerk. Duh. Not working so well, but whatever..."

"Right, I'm just gonna go and see if I see any cute, hot, emo dudes," Reneey said as she turned to leave, but was stopped as a vine sped out of nowhere and wrapped onto her wrist.

"You're not going anywhere, young lady!" Youko said. "You're... what do you humans call it? Starts with a g, I think.. what was it...? Ah, yes -- grounded for two weeks!"

"For what!?"

"For disrespect."

Lyn laughed at that. Well, really, laughter is an understatement; she doubled over, shaking with hysterics, and almost hyperventilated before she was finally able to stand up straight and fix Youko with her gaze again.

"You'll have to excuse me for that," she said with a cold note to her voice. "But how hysterical is it that _you're_ berating someone for _disrespect_?"

"Lyndotia," Kuronue said in a warning tone.

"Yes?" Lyn growled, switching her glare to him. It was rather reflexive, really; her full name was only ever used as a sort of challenge by the local jerks when they wanted an excuse to get on her bad side -- not that they really needed one. Even her family had never used it, aside from one slightly crazy grandmother who always spelled it wrong on birthday cards.

Meanwhile, Reneey was thinking, _Mmm.. if I'm a fangirl. shouldn't I be able to like.. get away?_ She pulled on the vine, it snapped, and she blinked. "Damn, that was awesome!"

"How did you do that?" Kuronue asked Reneey.

"Fangirl power!" Reneey said, grinning.

"I wonder if I have fangirl power in this anime?" Lyn questioned curiously. "Technically, I'm not a fangirl of any of the characters because they mostly bug me. But I am a fangirl of a character on another anime whose voice actor is the same guy as does his voice!" she concluded randomly, jerking her thumb at Kuronue.

"Who does my voice?" Kuroune asked, blinking. "What are you talking about?"

"Eric Stuart!" Lyn announced with a very fangirlish grin. "He's the same guy that does Seto Kaiba's voice on Yu-Gi-Oh! At least, he does in the American version. I have no clue who the crap did your voice in the Japanese version, or whether it's the same guy or not. It would be funny if it was, though."

Then she promptly sighed and murmured, "Ah, Seto-slash-Eric, why must you torment me...?"

"What?" Youko said, blinking. Then he shook his head and announced, "Argh, this is getting nowhere! I'm just gonna train Reneey!"

"What? No, I don't wanna!" Reneey pouted.

"Too bad," Youko said, crossing his arms over his chest.

"See, there you go again!" Lyn said exasperatedly. "Can't you ever say anything without sounding like an overbearing jerk?"

"Well, at least I'm a strong and powerful jerk!"

Reneey sighed. "Break it up, children!"

Lyn blinked. Then she blinked again. Then her eyes went wide as she stared at Reneey for a second, then suddenly made a cross with her fingers and backed away, yelling, "RENEEY IS BEING POSSESSED BY THE SPIRIT OF THE HAPPY FRIENDSHIP PRINCESS! RUN, RUN FOR YOUR LIIIIIVEES!"

Reneey twitched and growled. "I DON'T CARE! YOU!" She pointed to Youko. "APOLOGIZE FOR BEING A JERK!"

Then she turned to Lyn. "AND YOU! APOLOGIZE FOR CALLING DADDY A JERK!"

"I'm not --" Youko started.

"I DON'T GIVE A FLIPPING FISH!"

If possible, Lyn looked even more shocked now. "The apocalypse has come -- Reneey yelled and didn't curse!" Then she paused and looked at Reneey suspiciously. "Wait. No. First you go all Happy Friendship Princess and now you're yelling and not cursing. WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH RENEEY!?"

"LYNDOAIT HOWEVER YOU PRONOUNCE IT AND WHATEVER THE REST OF YOUR NAME IS! APOLOGIZE AFTER DADDY SAYS SORRY! RIGHT _NOW_!"

Kuronue covered his ears. "Yes, that is proof that you are Ruby's daughter; she could scream like twelve banshees."

Lyn shook her head, meeting Reneey's gaze fiercely. "I will not! And why the crap should I care if he apologizes to _me_ or not!? He can go off on me all he wants to, I'm used to it. _You're_ the one he should be apologizing to!"

"Wait.. really?" Reneey blinked, and everybody did a face fall.

Lyn sighed exasperatedly. "_Why_ do you always ask that, like you think I was lying the first time I said it?"

"Well, no, but.. huh?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Youko sighed. "This is really pointless."

"But it's amusing," Kuronue said, smirking. Youko sent him a death glare, which Kuronue just stuck out his tongue at.

"But didn't he.. already apologize to me?" Reneey asked, blinking. "I'm lost and confused..."

Youko rolled his eyes. "Fine! Reneey, I apologize to you _again_!"

"I guess I'm sorry, too," Reneey said, blinking, still lost and confused.

Lyn shook her head almost disbelievingly. "You were right, Youko," she said with a grim seriousness that was almost worse than her cold, accusing tone. "There _is_ no point to it, because when you say it, it means nothing."

She then shrugged and sat down cross-legged and began to finger her ring as if she had never quite seen it before.

Youko growled, "Kuronue, discipline your kid into respecting her elders."

Then he turned to Reneey and said with more feeling, "Reneey, I'm sorry."

Then he looked back at Lyn again and asked, "Now, is that enough _feeling_ for you?"

Reneey blinked at Lyn. "Um, Lynni.. ya know ya acting like a jerk right now yaself. Ya know that, right?"

"No, I'm telling the truth," Lyn said bluntly, still in that serious tone, as she looked up at Reneey with raised eyebrows and a look in her eyes that seemed to attest to her honesty. "It does tend to get negative reactions from people, but that doesn't mean you should bend it or just flat out lie, either."

"Well, so was Daddy.. and it turns out I was being a jerk... Oi, this so should not be going on with a thirteen-year-old..." Reneey groaned. "Just everybody say sorry and we'll be done and over with!"

"I already did! Three times!"

"Everybody but Daddy n Uncle n me, 'cause I said sorry for no idea why..."

Lyn arched an eyebrow. "If you want me to apologize, fine. I am sincerely sorry for whatever I might have done or said to any of you. But you could at least have the courtesy to ask me straight out instead of the pointless, not-so-subtle hints. There are a few people left in this godforsaken world who still appreciate honesty, Reneey."

"Don't ya think I know that?" Reneey asked, rolling her eyes. "You've been telling me that every week and week to week to week... But now that's done with, let's start over! ... And my head really hurts.. really it does.. which is why I'm not yelling..."

Youko sighed, rubbing his temples. "You know what!? This is hopeless! Call me when you people are through with all the sorry stuff!"

And so Youko left.

"Did Dad just walk out? That fucker!" Reneey yelled.

Kuronue raised his eyebrows. Yes, this was definitely more fun to watch than cable.

Where Lyn had only a moment before been calm and logical, there was now anger and even a bit of a deep-set hurt reflected in her eyes as she glared after Youko. She stood up, shaking her head, with a look resembling disgust on her face. "Dadburned carpetbagging turncoat," she snarled. "Just leave when you're tired of dealing, like that's an original move..."

Reneey let out a hiss as she glared at Lyn. "Oh, fuck off him, would ya!? In case you haven't noticed, you were simply being a jerk yourself in a way! Now snap off his ass! He already apologized three times, so hell off!" Reneey snapped as she stomped away.

"I believe it's fuck off," Kuronue said, blinking.

Reneey stopped stomping, shrugged, and said, "I like saying hell off better." And she continued on stomping.

Something shifted in Lyn's expression then, and then she set her jaw firmly. "Fine, Rea," she said softly. "But I won't let them do it to you, too."

She blinked once, looked down, and then set off slowly in the opposite direction.

_With Youko_

Youko sighed. _Maybe I was being a jerk, but I failed them before.. back in the old days,_ he thought bitterly as he sat down cross-legged, his plants all around him. _If I had just trained them.. trained Lyn to be stronger.. they would never have died..._

He frowned. _But is being a jackass really going to make them stronger?_ Heaving another, heavier sigh, he dropped his head low. _I wish Ruby and Kasumi were still alive. They were so much better at these things than Kuronue and I..._

And so Youko did the only thing that helped when he needed to sort things out: meditate.

_With Lyn_

The two different perspectives in Lyn's head were having a heated battle, which was giving her a huge headache. Again.

_He means well,_ said that small voice that still somehow wanted to think the best of everyone. The optimistic part of her psyche, I suppose.

_I can't know that,_ countered a much more powerful voice, the one that had been tempered like steel ever since she could remember. This was the voice that she usually would up listening to, because it was the one that had kept her alive for sixteen years. _He insults her, blows up at her, and walks away when he should be there for her._

_Everyone makes mistakes._

A muscle in Lyn's jaw twitched, and she resisted an urge to punch the closest solid object. _There's a difference between a mistake and a choice. And some choices are unforgivable._

_With Reneey_

Reneey sighed as she kicked a tree stump. _Daddy cares, I know he does. And so does Lynni. They both care, which is sickening if it goes too far... Well, for Daddy... Lynni stops, and somehow she knows when to... Gotta figure out how she always knows that..._

Reneey made a strange face and wodnered, _How the hell does she know!?_

Finally she shrugged and resumed pondering: _But Daddy just, like.. left... though it wasn't, like.. painful way... but still he did just, like, leave... And Lynni, she was just standing up for me, but seriously... He already left so she didn't have to be all bitchy._

Then Reneey stopped and blinked. _Wow. I sound so hypocritical when I said.. thought.. whatever!.. that just now.. but I shouldn't be mad at them..._

"Oi.. too much pressure on a thirteen-year-old."

_With Kuronue_

Kuronue just went back to his house; he knew that the girls and Youko needed some time to think. But what had Lyn meant when she had said she 'wouldn't let them do that to Reneey, too'? He pondered over it for some time; what exactly had gone on in Lyn's childhood?

His eyes went dark. _If anyone hurt her... they'll be dead before they can even blink! No, wait, death is too quick for that. I'll give them a slow and torturous death! Yes! Peel off their fingers one by one, then their toes, then slowly, inch by inch, pull out their spinal cord and gore them inside out!_

Kuronue did a mental evil laugh. _Yes! That will teach someone to hurt my daugher! Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!_

He smirked. _But first, I have to know what's happened in her lifetime.. otherwise our father-daughter relationship will only go so far... Maybe I can force Youko not to be a jackass... I did promise Ruby to look after Reneey, too... And I seem to remember from health class that teenage girls can go into depression, or something like that... I have to make sure that doesn't happen..._

He sighed. _Being an only parent is tough work._

He got some soda and went to his room to do his evil homework. _Why did I decide to go to school again?_ Then he grinned. _Oh, yeah, because of those girls and the school uniform..._ He chuckled. _And also cuz I look hot in my uniform._

And so he left to do his homework... andtotallynotwatchingTVanddefinitelynotwatching-coughporncough-

_Back with Lyn_

Walking somehow always helped to clear Lyn's mind. Maybe it was just because it gave her something to do besides reflect on whatever was bothering her, like guilt or anger. She had tended to spend a lot of time walking through the woods behind her house, back home.

Lyn stopped in her tracks when that thought struck her. _Home... But according to them, it isn't home at all. And odds are I'll never even see it again._ She scoffed and shook her head as she continued to walk. _Never thought I'd actually miss it after I spent so many years dreading going back whenever I went anywhere..._

Honestly, she had no idea where her feet were taking her any more; if she had been less distracted, she might have wondered how she was ever going to find her way back. After all, these stupid cities were like giant mazes, and a girl from the country was likely to have more trouble finding her way around than 'city slickers' like Reneey.

Reneey. And there it was again, the confusion and the resentment and the anger that was really just a cover so that the pain didn't show. Crude, but effective. And it also got her a reputation for being fierce and unpredictable, which was a good thing when you were putting all your effort into trying to scare people away.

And yet, strangely, it was the very thing that had let Reneey get through Lyn's guard. It was simple enough not to care what other people thought of you, but it was a different matter when it involved people who did; and that was who Reneey had been when Lyn had met her. Maybe Lyn had seen herself in the younger girl, or maybe she had just envied Reneey's eccentricities and the childhood that Lyn herself had never really had.

_But sometimes you have to make yourself grow up if you ever want to grow up at all,_ Lyn thought with a sigh.

She had closed her eyes for an instant at that thought, and when she opened them she was quite surprised to see that she had stumbled upon one of the people who had set her walking to try to sort out her thoughts in the first place: Youko. She almost said something out of sheer surprise, but held her tongue. It probably wasn't a good idea to even attempt to talk to him now, not least of all because she already had a strong desire to knock him a good one for walking off on Reneey like that. Maybe if she left quickly, he wouldn't notice that she had even been there.

Youko sensed Lyn behind him. He sighed and mumbled, "I'm sorry."

It was quite strange that this was _the_ Youko Kurama, _the_ coldhearted thief; but he had found love, and he had made something beautiful that he hadn't thought he would ever have: a child. And he had been crowned Lyn's godfather, but in order to be the good godfather that he had hoped to be, he knew that he would have to break his pride. It was necessary in order to get off of Lyn's bad side and into her good graces.

Lyn froze with her foot half lifted in a now futile attempt to get away before he noticed her presence. _Crap._

Heaving a sigh, she shifted her weight firmly back onto the ground and crossed her arms impatiently. It was taking all of her effort to keep a scowl off her face and the bite out of her voice. "I keep telling you -- I'm not the one you need to be saying that to."

"Then who exactly _should_ I say it to?"

Of course, Youko knew it _had_ to be Reneey -- it couldn't have been Kuronue -- but why exactly was he supposed to apologize to Reneey for the fourth time today?

_Urgh, mustnotyell, mustnotyell, mustnotyell..._

And it took tremendous effort, too, to keep her voice down -- if not exactly level -- as she answered, "Oh, I don't know -- the one who should actually matter to you? You don't seem to get it. I really don't care if you want to be an overbearing jerk to me. It's when you blow up at Reneey, or just turn around and leave like you don't even care how hard this retarded crap is to deal with, that you tick me off, Youko."

"I'm blowing up at her to teach her how to be tough!" Youko snapped. "Do you think I was _happy_ to hold the cold, dead body of my daughter!?" he snarled. "Or to see my goddaughter torn to shreds before my eyes!? I can't always protect her!"

He paused to add in a whisper that Lyn had to strain to hear, "And I'll be damned if I let that happen again."

Lyn shook her head almost sadly, but there was still fire in her eyes and ice in her voice. "And you think you're going to prevent that by scaring her? By yelling at her? By walking off when she has no idea what's going on? Do you have _any_ idea what that feels like, any idea at all?"

Youko dipped his head low. Yes, in fact he did know; when he was a kit, he was abused and then later abandoned by his parents. Left all alone, and at only four years old! That was pretty much how he had found and befriended Kuronue.

"Yes, in fact, I do know," he whispered. "And maybe it was a mistake to walk out on her..."

Of course, a parent would never want their child to be in pain, or to be frightened, and the very last thing in the world they would want was to be the very one who was _causing_ the pain and the fear. _Being a single parent really is a tough job... The girls were always so good with the kids..._

Lyn looked almost repulsed by his words. "How -- _how_ in heaven's name can you do that to someone if you've been through it!? How do you even begin to consider...?" Her voice failed her as a shudder ran down her spine. She couldn't even imagine putting someone she _hated_ through that, and yet...

A cool wave of dread hit her as she wondered if maybe it was like the shrinks always said, the way it was passed on, whether consciously or not.

"The demon world is not the best place. I would never want anyone to go through that. It's true that back then I was a heartless thief, but now I have am not, and I realize that I was doing the exact same thing that my oh-so-great," he growled, voice dripping with sarcasm, "parents did to me. Thank you, Lyn. I must leave now, to find my daughter."

And with a flash of silver, he left.

Lyn blinked, then shook her head. She wasn't entirely sure what had just happened, but it had only served to drill more thoughts -- most of them highly unpleasant -- into her already preoccupied mind. With a sigh, she started forward again; at this rate, she would be walking forever by the time she was able to think clearly again.

_Back with Reneey_

Reneey was sitting on a ledge beside a pond, her bare feet kicking the water and causing ripples. Reneey didn't know exactly why she was _hurt_ -- I mean, it wasn't like Youko had left completely. And she didn't know why she had yelled at Lyn. Hell, if anything, she should have yelled at Youko! So why hadn't she?

Why didn't she yell at Youko for calling her by her real name? Why didn't she snarl at Youko when his plant grabbed her? Why did she defend him when he left? And why did a thirteen-year-old girl have to go through all this in the first place?

"Ag, I think Lyn is rubbing off on me! She's more of the emotional not-taking-crap-like-this-well person. I'm the one who doesn't care and goes with the flow of it!"

She sighed. Ow... being deep really gives me a headache...

The girl brought her knees close to her and rest her chin on them. Why was she so.. afraid of Youko? Why didn't she go all ballistic when he called her weak? Was it because he was her dad? And not the old dad who had left for Russia and only came back a week or less every five or six months. No, this was a dad who cared, and loved... Maybe that was what she was afraid of.

Only a very few certain people knew that Reneey hid behind her "Loony/Cold Mask," and Lyn was one of them. Though she would never, ever admit it, Reneey looked up to Lyn, and envied her for being the stronger of the two.

But never, ever, not even in a life and death situation, would Reneey admit that.

"My head really does hurt," she mumbled.

"Here, take this -- it's a medicine that your mother always gave me when I had a headache." The voice spoke from behind her, and Reneey's fox ears twitched as she snapped around in Youko's direction.

"Daddy?"

Youko was holding out his hand; inside it were crushed rose metals with some sort of liquid that Reneey couldn't identify. She sniffed it and made a face.

"It smells like a torture device."

Youko laughed. "That's what I said, at first. But it really works."

He gave it to Reneey, who gulped it down. "Ewww.. Hey, wait, my headache's gone! ... Awesome."

She grinned, a little tentatively, and Youko smiled a little, too, as he sat next to her and put his arms around her. "You know, this should be my quote to you every time I see you: I'm sorry. Counting that, I've already said it four times today."

Reneey giggled.

"But really, I truly am. I should have known that the best way for you to be strong definitely wouldn't come from my screaming and yelling at you."

He sighed. Yes, Ruby was far better at these things.. but it was a father's job, he had to. Hey, being a parent meant you had to make sacrifices.

"And I'm sorry for scaring you... And maybe I shouldn't have left you, but be there, instead."

Reneey smiled a bit as she laid her head on his shoulder. "Hey, Daddy?"

"Hmm?"

"I forgive you.. just don't ever call me by my real name."

Youko chuckled. "Deal."

"Mmkay..."

And then Reneey fell asleep. Youko smiled down at her, and memories of times when he had rocked her back and forth to calm her when she was young flashed in his eyes.

_Back with Lyn_

Lyn kept on wandering, trying to clear her head and to figure out what Youko had meant. And also, where was Kuronue!? He seemed to have just.. disappeared!

_Well, I guess he's back at his house... But what kind of father just leaves his daughter and goddaughter like that!?_ She sighed and shook her head; if it wasn't Youko, it was Kuronue.

A couple of minutes later, Lyn spotted a pond and her mood lightened slightly. She liked ponds, especially when there were flat rocks by the edge that she could skip. So, naturally, she walked up to it, but when she got there, she was shocked.

There was Youko, with his arms around Reneey, who was asleep with her head on his shoulder. Youko met Lyn's eyes and mouthed, 'Thank you.'

Lyn blinked in surprise, but then smiled faintly and nodded. Maybe he was all right, after all, if Reneey could let him into her life.

But if he pulled anything again, this time she _would_ kill him.

Lyn left, finally deciding that she could trust Youko at least a little. Anyway, she now faced the question of how on earth she was supposed to get to Kuronue's house. Youko's illusion was long gone, so Lyn went back to the deserted, misty place where she had found Kuronue earlier. Her pale green eyes searched, but found nothing, and she bit the inside of her cheek, thinking.

_Let's see.. I was pulled here last time, so maybe I could somehow get pulled to Kuronue's house?_

One minute passed.

Two minutes passed.

Ten minutes passed.

"Okay, that was pointless," she grumbled. Then her wings came out and so did the bat's ears. It was lucky that nobody was there. Lyn gritted her teeth as the wings dug through her skin.

_Okay, that's really.. annoying. I must ask Kuronue... DAD... how to control these wings. As cool as they look, it feels weird, having them flap here and there, and appearing and disappearing..._

She growled as a gust of wind hit her shoulders and back and the back of her neck. Finally, she looked around at a stone and promptly proceeded to beat her head against it.

_Back with Kuronue_

Kuronue fell asleep, watching -- um, I mean, _studying_, but then suddenly his eyes opened wide and he jumped up. _Lyn's in trouble!_ Of course, demon parents had senses greater than human ones, and somehow parents always seem to know.. wonder how they always seem to know...?

Instantly, he ran downstairs and slammed the door open, then closed, as he ran to find Lyn.

_Ten minutes later_

"Lyn!" could be heard. "Lyn, where are you!?"

He kept on yelling; his senses told him that Lyn was at his thinking place, and when he found her, he had not one, not two, but three sweatdrops, AND did a face fall.

"You're banging your head against a rock!? And you had me worrying over you for no reason!?" he yelled, twitching.

Lyn stopped banging her head against the stone and looked, blinking, at Kuronue. "Oh.. hi. Yeah, um, how do you control these wings? Because, y'know, as cool as they look and everything, they're really annoying... And what was my mother's element?" Lyn asked, remembering what Kuroune had been saying earlier about elemental bat demons and other random stuff.

Kuronue twitched again and resisted the urge to strangle Lyn for having him dead worried over her.

"Fire -- Kasumi's element was fire. Mine is Shadow. You have both Fire and Shadow elements inside you; your mother's spirit and fire, but my appearance and shadow."

Kuronue smiled a bit. Oh, how he missed his mate! But he had his daughter, and he'd be damned if he would let anything happen to her. He owuld go through hell and back just to be sure that she was all right.

"Oh, and you didn't kill my best friend, did you?" Kuronue asked with amusement on his face.

Lyn rolled her eyes. "No, I didn't kill him."

Silence fell, and then she asked slowly, "So.. what.. did she look like?"

Kuronue looked to the sky, and a smile reached his lips. "She was beautiful. Her hair was the orange of flames, with red bangs and yellow tips. Her wings were an elegant mixture of yellow flames, the sharp ends were orange, and there were fiery flames painted on them."

He paused to sigh. "She had creamy skin and a nice figure. Her eyes, they were green, but you could see a hint of red in them." He smiled at Lyn, then. "You have mine and your mother's eyes: green, indigo, and red. Somehow, they look good together.. I don't know how..."

He shrugged, then continued: "She had a slim figure and long nails, about as sharp as Youko's. Her legs were long and strong..." He let out a deeper sigh, and Lyn wondered at the clarity of the mental image he must still have of her mother if he was able to describe her in such detail.

Then Kuronue put an arm around Lyn's shoulders. "Come on -- let's go home."

As they walked back to Kuronue's house, Lyn reflected on how strange it was that she had only just met him today.. and yet it was the first time she could remember feeling that she was wanted, and that she had a place where she belonged.

A/N: Wow -- me and Lyn spent over five hours writing this chapter! XD Anyway, this looong chap is a gift for all of our reviewers! We need our muses...

Akantha: Wait, it's over? WRITE MORE! I DEMAND A 10,000 WORD CHA -- (gets cut off)

Lysane: Oh, quit it, would you -- (gets cut off)

Lysane: NO! YOU CUT OFF AKANTHA, NOT ME! DO YOU -- (gets cut off again)


	10. Chapter 10

**10. Jerk All Over Again**

It was nighttime -- well, more like eleven PM. Lyn was pacing back in forth in Kuronue's living room.

"Where are they!?" she snapped. "It's been five hours! Five dagblame hours!"

"Lyn, if you pace any more, you'll make a rut in the floor," Kuronue said, sweatdropping.

"Well, I'd rather go outside and oh, I dunno, LOOK FOR THEM, but SOMEBODY won't let me..."

"It's dark out! You're not going out there!"

"Urgh, if he's done something to her, I'll dip him by those pointy ears of his into a vat of boiling oil and feed his entrails to the carrion fowl..."

"Lyn, calm down! I know Youko, and he won't let anything happen to her," Kuronue assured her, but he couldn't help let out a chuckle.

"What's so funny!?" she demanded with a glare.

"Well, it's just that.. Back in the old days, when I told you that you were going to have a godsister..." He smiled a bit. "You were always overprotective of her. You wouldn't even let Youko or Ruby near her until you checked to make sure that they didn't have anything that could hurt her."

He laughed. "One time, Ruby and Youko had just fone through a battle, and they had blood on them. So you gave them a rant about how you shouldn't let Reneey see all that blood, and what kind of parents are you!"

He grinned. "It was really funny, and you gave Youko quite a lot of bruises on the shins."

"I'll give him more than bruises if they don't show up soon..."

Finally the lock was picked, and there stood Youko, who had Reneey asleep in his arms. Well.. half asleep.

"I har yer dar," Reneey said in sleepy talk.

"What?" Youko blinked.

"She said 'I hate you, Dad,'" Lyn translated, rolling her eyes.

"Wakin' me up," Reneey grumbled.

"I needed you to be awake," Youko said.

"Oh dur you coc sucie as hoe..." (AKA: Oh fuck you, cock sucking ass hole)

"Lyn?" Youko asked.

"I am so not repeating that!" She shook her head. "You really must learn to speak Reneey. And Sleepy Reneey. And Sick Reneey. And Excited Reneey. And all of the dialects of Reneey, for that matter."

"Kuro, do you have an extra bedroom I could put her in?" Youko asked as Reneey fell asleep again.

"Yeah -- go upstairs and take a right."

Youko nodded and left, and Lyn let out a sigh. "So, they're back and they're alive and they're okay. Now, I'm gonna kill him!" Then she paused and looked thoughtful. "No, wait, death is too quick. I shall carve his heart out with a plastic spoon. No, wait, a plastic knife. Plastic spoons are sharper than plastic knives, so a plastic knife will take longer."

Kuronue raised his eyebrows. "Your death threats are like your mother's. She was always good with random death threats."

"They're not random, thank you. I put a great deal of thought and effort into perfecting them."

"Riiight," Kuronue said with a chuckle. "Anyway, I'm going to bed. Just don't kill your godfather, all right?"

He hugged her good night and left for bed, and at the same time, Youko came back down.

"I should go home before Suichi's mom comes home from work and freaks out..."

He started to leave, but was still by Lyn's dagger-piercing-glare-of-death. (Lyn: It's patented! D)

"Where in the name of all that is good and holy have you two been for the past five hours!?" she hissed in a low voice so as not to wake up Reneey or alert Kuronue to the fact that she was going off on his best friend again. "Where do you get off, wandering around randomly with a thirteen-year-old until eleven o'clock at night!? So _help_ me, if you don't stop being such an inconsiderate jerk, I'll impale you on a pike and hang you Babylonian style!"

"Well, first of all, she was asleep the whole entire time. We were at the same place where you saw us, until someone attacked us."

"WHAT!?" Lyn interrupted.

"We got attacked, Reneey slept right through it. How you can possibly sleep through someone attacking you, I will never know." Youko shook his head and went on, "So then I killed him --"

"IN FRONT OF RENEEY!?"

"She was asleep!"

"And what if she woke up!?"

"Well.. then she would've seen it."

Lyn's left eye began to twitch.

"So then I woke her up and dragged her here," Youko concluded with a shrug.

Lyn was still battling furiously against that seemingly ever-present desire to whack him upside the head. "Are you out of your cotton-picking MIND!?" she demanded in a whisper-scream. "Why the crap were you just sitting there all this time, anyway!?"

"Just sitting there? I was fighting him! Though all I really needed was to send my death tree plant after him, but I wanted to have some fun with him. I don't take kingly to those who attack me or the ones I care for," Youko finished with a shrug.

Lyn's left eye was still twitching, and now she was clicking her fingernails, too. "You expect me to believe that you were fighting for FIVE HOURS!? And Reneey just slept!?" She paused and then shrugged. "Well, actually, I believe the Reneey sleeping for five hours part; she could sleep through a tornado, siren and all. But seriously! It's been dark for _five hours_!"

"No, no, no, you misunderstand me!" Youko said, shaking his head. "We sat there for four hours, then the attacker came and I decided to show him what happens when he tries to kill my daughter."

"But then -- wait, WHAT!? Tried to kill her!?"

"Hey, I stopped it! And she didn't get hurt!" Youko said defensively, but suddenly Lyn hit him in the side of the head -- hard, this time, not just a half joking smack like before. There was unfathomable disbelief and outrage in her eyes as she all but exploded:

"I DON'T CARE IF YOU HAVE A DEATH WISH, BUT LEAVE RENEEY OUT OF IT! I COME FROM THE COUNTRY, WHERE YOU COULD LEAVE YOUR DOORS UNLOCKED AT NIGHT AND NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE WERE NAIVE ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY DO THAT! AND EVEN THERE I DIDN'T GO WANDERING AROUND IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT! WHY IN HEAVEN'S NAME WERE YOU SITTING AROUND UNTIL TEN O'CLOCK AT NIGHT IN THE FIRST PLACE!? AND YOU DIDN'T EXPECT ANYTHING BAD TO HAPPEN!?"

"Lyn? Are we under attack? And who's the asshole with a death wish that woke me up!?" Reneey snapped as she appeared, glaring at them both. "And why doI have a bump on my head and a scratch on my arm?" she added with a blink.

"YOUKO!"

"Well, I killed him before he could do any more damage!" Youko shouted back.

"YOU DADBURNED IMBECILIC CARPETBAGGING SCUMBAG LIAR!" Lyn thundered.

"Huh? Oi, what happened this time?"

"Wait, you can sleep through an attack, but you can't sleep through yelling?" Youko asked, blinking at Reneey.

"Yeah, I g.. wait, what!?" Reneey shouted.

"Oi, Lynni, what happened?" Reneey asked.

Lyn was busy giving Youko a glare that seemed to wish him a slow and torturous death. Her eyes gleamed maliciously as she growled, "No, I think I'll let _him_ tell you how he almost got you killed."

"That got what? What is she talking about, Daddy?" Reneey asked Youko, who sighed.

"We got attacked. While I was fighting him, he apparently made a clone and it knocked you out, which is why you have that bump, and you cut your arm. But I killed them before they could do any more damage."

"Oh, okay.. so am I supposed to be, like.. idk.. on fire? And why are you two spinning?" Reneey asked, blinking.

"The crap?" Lyn asked.

"No," Youko said slowly.

"Okay, stop spinning, damn it!" Reneey snapped.

"Er, Rea, we're not spinning," Lyn said slowly, eyeing her friend with concern. She had been attacked, and now she was going on about being on fire and things spinning? Probably she was just stressed.. dizzy... that would be all it was...

"Hey, people?"

"Mm?"

"Yes?"

"When I fall, and you people let my head get cracked open, my ghost will haunt you all."

And thus Reneey fell down, but Youko caught her before she could hit the ground. He seemed to smell for something, and then growled, "Poison!"


	11. Chapter 11

**11. A Cure and a Confrontation**

"_Poison_!?" Lyn repeated disbelievingly. Well, more like not wanting to believe.

"Yes, poison."

Lyn stared at Youko. "Wait, wait -- don't demons have better senses than humans? How could you not have noticed that!?"

"I don't know, maybe it's odorless until it's activated," Youko said as he examined Reneey. Sweat was pouring from her forehead, and she was shaking and moaning a little bit.

"So what the crap does this mean and what are you gonna do about it!?" Lyn demanded, trying to keep from losing it. After all, poison wasn't her area of expertise unless it came from a snakebite.

"Well, go get a cold cloth rag or something cool and wake up your father, because he needs to tell me what else to do..."

"WHAT!?"

"Well, he was always good with poison!"

Lyn resisted an urge to smack herself in the forehead, but her eye was twitching again as she went to find Kuronue and wake him up, since she had no idea where she could find a cold cloth, anyway.

"Owww," Reneey groaned as she slowly opened her eyes.

"Hey.. how are you feeling? You're poisoned!"

"Oh, that's it?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Youko twitched. "That's it!? Reneey, you could die!"

"Oh, right.. I knew that..."

_With Lyn and Kuronue_

Lyn had finally figured out which room was Kuronue's and knocked -- okay, maybe kind of punched the door a couple of times -- while yelling, "GET UP NOW BEFORE I KICK THE DOOR DOWN AND DRAG YOU OUT HERE BY YOUR POINTY EARS!"

"UNLESS SOMEONE IS ON THE VERGE OF DEATH, I'M NOT WAKING UP!" Kuronue shouted back.

Lyn let out a low growl and, ten minutes later, Kuronue had black and blue all over him and was sweatdropping as he walked downstairs to the living room.

"You know, when I said 'unless someone is on the verge of death,' I didn't actually mean it."

"Just do something!" Youko and Lyn snapped together, and then Lyn made a face and wondered how in the name of Seto Kaiba she had wound up on the same side as Youko when she was still ticked at him.

Reneey, right. Well, killing Youko would have to wait until later; Reneey came first.

"All right," Kuronue said. "First, Lyn, go to the batrhoom, put a towel in cold water, and rinse it out."

Lyn nodded and left.

"Now how in the seven hells did this happen!?"

"We were attacked, and the attacker made a clone, knocked Reneey out and cut her arm, probably slipped her some sort of poison that remains odorless until it's activated."

Kuronue raised his eyebrows. "Do you know what kind of demon he was?"

"Yes, spider."

"So, spider demon venom," Kuronue said, nodding. "I remember, quite nasty. Okay, Youko, go to CVS (Me: Does Japan have a CVS? Lyn: Reneey, it's a fanfic. Of course Japan has a CVS!) and steal or buy or whatever you do these days some painkillers, antivenom, and a needle." (Me: I don't think CVS has needles... Lyn: Reneey, it's a fanfic, so CVS does have needles!)

Youko nodded; he knew what Kuronue meant, because Suichi's mom had sent him to CVS multiple times.

Lyn came back with the cold towel, and Kuronue said, "All right, Lyn, we have to keep Reneey awake until Youko returns."

Lyn rolled her eyse. "That's easy. SCOTTY VANITY!"

"WHERE!?" Reneey shouted.

"Shit -- fuck, that hurt," she cursed as she coughed up blood. "I blame you, Lyn, for making me scream! If I die, my ghost will sue you!"

"Then Gobble's ghost will be my attorney, and I will win. Anyway, don't blame me -- blame that dad of yours!"

"Then my closet and the ghost that haunts my room and tries to kill me will fight Gobble's ghost and --" Reneey broke into another coughing fit. "Yeah, this is what I get for arguing..."

"Reneey, how do you feel?" Kuronue asked.

"Well, let's see, I'm coughing up blood, I feel like I'm on fire -- oh, and you two are spinning."

"Okay, but you need to stay awake," Kuronue said seriously.

"Well, duh -- I mean, there's hell no way I'm going to the light, it will burn my skin!"

"Why the crap do you find this so funny?" Lyn asked with a frown.

"Because nobody but the bad people die in this series, Lyn," Reneey said, rolling her eyes. "I mean, Yusuke died three times! The most we would do is go to the spirit world and threaten Bratty Brat to bring us back."

Reneey shrugged like she didn't really care, and in truth, she didn't. I mean, it's death; you can't stop it, and crying certainly won't bring anyone back... but scaring Bratty Brat into bringing them back will work.

Kuronue blinked, and Lyn just shook her head. Maybe Reneey believed that, but Lyn didn't. Maybe in cartoons, you got as many chances as you wanted, but not in life. It wasn't that forgiving.

_Once Reneey's feeling better, I'm going to make sure Youko doesn't even think about pulling this crap again,_ Lyn thought darkly as she glared at the wall, pretending it was Youko. Ironically, Youko came in with the stuff, but the bad thing was that he held out the needle.

Reneey's eyes went wide with fear. "Um, can I go to the bathroom?"

"No," Lyn said firmly.

"But I really --"

"A real lie, that's for sure," Lyn said, crossing her arms.

"But it's a fregging needle!" Reneey objected, trying to hide behind Lyn. "Save me!"

The corner of Lyn's mouth twitched as if some part of her had seen the irony in the situation. "That's exactly what I'm trying to do," she said quietly.

_You're not gonna leave me here alone with these wackos, Rea. I'll lose it and kill them all._

"But it's pointy and sharp and I like pointy sharp things, but not when they're used against me!"

"Reneey, I promise it won't hurt," Youko sighed.

"Liar! They all say that, but it does hurt!" Reneey declared.

"That's because you always tense up," Lyn said exasperatedly.

What nobody had noticed, though, was that Kuronue took the stuff from Youko, hid in the corner, and filled the needle with antivenom.

"Reneey, I want you to live!" Youko snapped. "And you will, even if I have to tie you down!"

"Child abuse!" Reneey yelled.

Kuronue then got a glass of water, put the painkillers in it, and gave the cup to Reneey while hiding the needle behind his back.

"Here, Reneey, drink this," he told her. "And hold out the arm with the cut."

"I can totally call child se -- OW! FUCK! UNCLE!" Reneey yelled as Kuronue stuck the needle into the arm she held out.

"SHIT! THAT HURT!"

"It's almost done, Reneey," Kuronue said with a sigh as he injected the antivenom.

"You're as bad as Kelly about the needles," Lyn said, shaking her head.

After five hours -- well, five minutes, but it felt like five hours to Reneey -- the antivenom had been administered and everything was fine. Well.. for her and Kuronue. Youko would be lucky to be walking the next day.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to have a little talk with a certain godfather," Lyn growled, spitting out the 'godfather' part.

"Sure, just don't kill anyone," Kuronue sighed as he again went back to bed. Reneey shrugged and went to the guest room.

"Night!" she called, and Lyn nodded in response.

When Youko and Lyn were alone, Lyn took a deep breath, crossed her arms, and said in a forcibly calm voice, "You have two minutes to come up with a really, really, REALLY good defense. After that, I cannot be responsible for my actions."

"I just told you, like, two hours ago! What more do you need!?" Youko sighed; it was like dealing with Kasumi and Ruby all over again.

Lyn shook her head. "I didn't ask for an explanation. I asked for a _defense_. You almost got her killed, Youko, and the best you could come up with was 'I killed him'? What about _you_? You're the one who put her in danger in the first place! I swear, if you ever pull anything like this again, I'll kill you, whatever Kuronue says."

Youko pursed his lips. He knew that Lyn was right; knew that it was his fault. He had let it happen. Why did he stay there in the first place? Oh, right, because it had been a hundred years since he had held his daughter and, when he got the chance again, he took advantage of that. Which resulted in Reneey being poisoned.

"What kind of parent am I?" Youko muttered, shaking his head.

Lyn's jaw was still set. She would probably feel bad for him later, but at the moment, she was too ticked off to be anything else.

"She doesn't need to be babied, Youko, but you can't jeopardize her life, either." Her eyes flashed fiercely as she growled, "I won't let you. Not after everything, not after all these years. Not again."

Youko blinked. "Define 'Not after everything, not after all these years, not again.'"

A hint of color tinged Lyn's cheeks. Crap, she hadn't meant to say that out loud. "Nothing. None of your dadburned business."

"If it deals with my daughter, then it _is_ my business, Lyn. Tell me. Now." Youko looked straight into Lyn's pale green eyes with a stern look on his face.

Lyn, however, shook her head, looking determined despite her obvious slip-up. "No. It's not my place to tell, it's not just my story."

_And I wouldn't tell you if it were,_ she added mentally.. but Youko didn't have to know that.

Youko raised his eyebrows. Exactly what had happened to his daughter in that other place? He would find out.

"What do you mean by 'It's not my place to tell'? Did something happen to her!? Did someone hurt her!?"

Anger was in Youko's eyes, but not at Lyn, though; it was at the thought of someone hurting his daughter. Yeah, you don't wanna piss off demon dads, just like you don't wanna piss off country dads.

Lyn met his gaze unflinchingly, but some of the fire had been extinguished from her eyes. It made her look tired. Finally she sighed and answered, "Life is full of pain; it's an uphill battle, you can't avoid it. It helps if you have people fighting for you, and I've always been on Reneey's side since I've known her. Beyond that, I can't say; she has her secrets and I have mine. If you want to know about Reneey, you're going to have to ask her yourself. She'll tell you what she wants you to know." Antcipating an objection, she added quickly, "I'm not going to give you her life's story. I wouldn't want her to tell mine, and she wouldn't want me to do that to her, either."

"Yes, I can see that you are Kasumi's daughter -- you have her attitude and all," Youko said with a small smile.

Lyn nodded and left to go to bed. Or, well, to go lie down; she doubted she would be able to sleep.

The next morning, Youko was determined to find out from Reneey, and he would make sure Kuronue learned about Lyn's life, too. After all, what kind of parents would they be if they didn't know about their daughters' lives?


	12. Chapter 12

**12. Idgets, Jerks, and Snoops**

It was a Saturday morning. Lyn was still in her room trying to sort things out, and Youko had left the night before for his human side's mother's house so that she wouldn't freak when she didn't see Suichi there.

At the moment, Kuronue and Reneey were watching Saturday morning cartoons.

"I don't get the point of this show," Kuronue said, sweatdropping.

"Me, either, but it has this hot guy in it..."

Kuronue rolled his eyes. "What is it with you girls?"

Reneey stuck out her tongue. "Besides, Lyn don't care if there're cute guys. She likes shows with _plot_, go figure."

Finally, after the show was over, Kuronue was starting to get worried that Lyn hadn't come down yet.

"Hey, Reneey?"

"Yeah?"

"What do you know about Lyn?" he asked slowly.

"What do you mean?" Reneey asked with raised eyebrows.

Kuronue shrugged. "Like.. her past. And her life."

Reneey pursed her lips as she stopped eating her cereal. It was almost silent for a couple of minutes.

_Should I tell him? I mean, he is her dad, so wouldn't he have a right to know? .. Wait, no. She wouldn't tell mine, so I won't tell hers._

"It's not my place to tell," Reneey said, ironically enough the exact same thing that Lyn had said to Youko. "You'll have to ask her that, not me."

Just then, Lyn came down the stairs, looking oddly distracted. "Do you have.. like.. food?" she asked Kuronue with a raised eyebrow. "As in food that I'm not allergic to?"

"What are you not allergic to?" Kuronue asked as he got up and went to the kitchen.

"Not much," Lyn said dryly.

Reneey bit the inside of her cheek. Should she tell Lyn that Kuronue had asked her about Lyn's life? Actually, in truth, Reneey didn't know _all_ about Lyn's past; only what Lyn had told her, and Rea couldn't really remember half of that... So really the only thing Reneey could tell him was that Lyn was allergic to everything under the sun and that she was as sadistic baby.

"Hey, Lynni, I gotta tell ya something. Meet me in me room.. or the guest room.. or whatever!"

Reneey grinned as she skipped up the stairs.

CRASH!

"Not my fault!"

Lyn sighed and shook her head. "I'll be back after I make sure she didn't kill herself," she called to Kuronue before following Reneey up the stairs and into the guest room.

"What's up?" she asked in a low voice, suspicious that Reneey wanted to talk alone.

"Uncle was asking me about ya past."

Lyn frowned. "Ironically, so did your dad. Last night, after you went upstairs. And no, I didn't kill him." She paused for a second and then asked, "Did you tell him anything?"

"No, I just said that it's not my place to tell and he'd have to ask you."

"Weird," Lyn asid, blinking. "That's almost exactly what I told your dad."

"Wow," Reneey said, blinking, too.

"So.. should we tell 'em?" Reneey asked Lyn. "Ya know, thinking n going deep makes my head hurt, so I'm just gonna ask you."

Lyn sweatdropped. "I can't tell you what to do, Rea. This is something you have to decide in your own. Just.. don't tell Kuronue anything, all right? I know _you're_ perfectly fine with all of this, but..." She sighed. "I just.. I don't know if I can really trust them yet."

"Aww, so I can't tell him that you were a sadistic baby?"

Reneey pouted, and Lyn picked up a pillow and threw it at Reneey.

"Ow! Fine, I won't tell! But don't tell Daddy, either, just because.. I don't know why," Reneey muttered with a shrug.

"You know, we shouldn't be doing this," Kuronue said.

"Yes, but we need to know," Youko objected.

"Yes, but you _don't_ go violating teenage girls' privacy. Believe me, I have a lot of bruises from the girls at my school," Kuronue grumbled. "They bite, scratch, yell, bite, scream, slam doors, bite, they're sneaky, they lie -- and did I mention they bite?"

Youko sweatdropped. "What's this? My partner, _the_ Kuronue, is afraid of teenage girls?"

"Hey, you never dealt with them!" Kuronue said defensively. "You only had a fangirl club. That's not even close to the torture of teenage girls!"

Lyn heard voices due to her bat ears, and she twitched as she went to the door and opened it -- and there stood Youko and Kuronue.

"First idgets, then jerks, and now snoops?" Lyn asked with a raised eyebrow.

"He made me do it!" Kuronue objected, pointing at Youko.

"So much for sticking till the end," Youko said with a sweatdrop.

"Jeez, y'all are as bad as the retard I lived next door to," Lyn growled, slamming the door in their faces and turning Sweet Child o' Mine up full blast on her cell phone before plopping down cross-legged on Reneey's bed. "Insufferable morons..."

"Don't they know that you never violate a teenage girl's privacy?" Reneey asked, blinking.

"Apparently not," Lyn hissed.

"So.. what do we do now?" Reneey asked. "And have you accepted the whole daughter-father thing?"

Lyn sighed. "I don't know. Maybe.. sorta.. I don't know, dadburn it!"

"So what should _we_ do?" Reneey asked.

"I don't know, Reneey!" Lyn sighed. "This is what I get for saying no when you wanted to meet Shane..."

"Shane! He's soo hot, like very hot!" Reneey did a very fangirly sigh. "And his skateboard is hot."

"He has a record, Rea," Lyn said exasperatedly. "The last thing you need is a guy with a record!"

"So does Dilan, but you still hang out with him!" Reneey objected, pointing a finger at Lyn.

Lyn planted her palm in the middle of her forehead. "He's my cousin! Not my fault that he's a moron with a talent for breaking into cars."

"So why can't I hang out with Shane!? He hangs out with Dilan! Besides, it's not like he's doing anything illegal right now," Reneey crossed her arms across her chest and glared at Lyn.

Lyn's eye twitched. "Reneey, you're forgetting one very important thing. WE'RE IN ANOTHER DADBURNED WORLD AT THE MOMENT!"

"I'M TALKING ABOUT IF WE GET BACK! I AM SO HANGING OUT WITH SHANE AND YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT! 'CAUSE I CAN DO THAT!"

"No, you can't," Lyn laughed. "You've never met him; you have no idea where to find him. So therefore I _can_ stop you, so HA."

"That's what you think," Reneey said, smirking. "Besides, I could always go out looking for him, get kidnapped and raped and killed and just think: you could've prevented that by simply telling me where he lives."

Reneey grinned. "And I just broke the number one rule for villains, do not ever tell your secret plan, because it will not work, so my plan won't work 'cause I just said it..."

"So therefore I have nothing to worry about," Lyn said, shrugging. "Anyway, we're now completely off the topic. So do you wanna carry on a random fake conversation and mess with their heads or just go whack them upside the head and be done with it?"

"Well, _I'm_ going to sleep. You can. C ya!"

So Reneey dove under the covers and fell asleep, and Lyn sweatdropped and shook her head before getting up, turning the music off, and leaving. It wasn't going to be any fun to stick around and risk waking Reneey up and getting yelled at for no reason, anyway.

Youko had left to meet Hiei, and Kuronue was waiting downstairs when Lyn left Reneey's room.

"Hey, Lyn, come here -- I want to ask you something."

Lyn raised an eyebrow suspiciously, but walked over and asked slowly, "Yes...?"

"Well, as you know, I've told you about my past and your demon past. And, if you want, I'm really interested to know about your past.. so..."

Kuronue didn't really know the right words to use. I mean, he couldn't just up and say, 'Hey, Lyn, tell me what happened in your past.'

Lyn crossed her arms and sighed. "You've been talking to Youko, haven't you?"

"Yes, why?" Kurone asked, blinking.

"Because he's nosy, too."

"What do you mean? You don't have to tell me. It would just be nice to know about my daughter's life."

Lyn heaved a sigh and turned her gaze up to the ceiling. "Like what?" she asked grudgingly.

"Anything you would want to tell me," Kuronue said simply, putting his arms around her shoulders. "I'm always here to talk, you know."

Lyn's right eyebrow shot up again. "What makes you think I _need_ someone to talk to?"

"I don't -- it's just a fatherly thing to say. But, you know, I would really like to know about my daughter's past," Kuroune said again, smiling a little.

Resisting an urge to grit her teeth, Lyn took a deep breath and said, "Fine. Ask whatever you want to, but I'm not promising I'll answer."

"Well.. to start off, where did you live? And who did you live with?"

Lyn shrugged. "An old house out in the boondocks, in Tennessee, with my grandparents and my aunt."

"What about your.. human parents?" Kuronue asked, a bit confused.

Lyn just shrugged and repeated, a little more stiffly this time, "I lived with my grandparents."

"But what happened to your parents?"

"What does it matter?" Lyn asked, crossing her arms again and scowling.

Kuronue knew that he was digging in too deep, and so he just dropped it. "So would you like to know anything?"

"I thought I was here because you wanted to ask _me_ questions," Lyn said tonelessly.

"Well, I mean, if you have any questions, you know," Kuronue said, shrugging and smiling a bit. "So.. hungry?"

"Not really," Lyn admitted. "I don't tend to get hungry unless I don't eat for a long time. But I probably should eat, considering I only had lunch yesterday."

"So what do you want?"

"Something I'm not allergic to. And that isn't eggs; I hate eggs, they taste like puke."

Kuronue blinked. "Care to be a bit more specific?"

"That is pretty specific," Lyn said, laughing. "I have a list of allergies longer than my arm."

"Do you mind telling me!? I have to kow these things! I mean, what if I fed you something that you're allergic to and you died!?" Kuronue was starting to freak out.

"Most of them aren't that bad," Lyn said, smiling. "But if you want a list..."

She sighed and started ticking things off on her fingers: "Bananas, papayas, plantains, avocados -- most South and Central American fruits, really..."

"Hold on, let me get a paper and pencil," Kuronue said, and let to find them; at the same time, Reneey came downstairs, yawning.

"I thought I saw Shane.. so then I woke up.. but he wasn't there..."

"Be prepared for an interrogation," Lyn muttered with a sideways glance to make sure that Kuronue was still gone. "Kuronue's just been asking..."

"Crap, I'm gonna go, c ya!"

Reneey made for the door, but was stopped by a grinning Kuronue. "Oh, good, Reneey, you're awake! Being the good godfather that I am, I'm going to ask you some things!"

"Huh?" Reneey asked, blinking.

"She isn't allergic to anything, lucky jerk," Lyn put in, in the hopes of getting Reneey a pass on whatever interrogation Kuronue presently had in mind.

"Okay -- but, you know, some other things: likes, dislikes, etc..."

"Uhh..." Reneey looked at Lyn. "That's okay.. umm..."

There was a look of 'help me!' on her face as she tried to plead wordlessly with Lyn.

"Um, shouldn't you be making that list of allergies?" Lyn interrupted, poking the pad of paper in Kuronue's hand. "Because, you know, I have medical allergies, too, and you should definitely know those in case something happened..."

Argh, she hated being treated all fragile like Kuronue was sure to do when he realized just how long her list of allergies _was_; but she definitely wasn't going to let Reneey sweat.

"Oh, yeah! Reneey, I'll get back to you later. Lyn, tell me everything that you're allergic to!"

"We'll be thirty by the time she finishes," Reneey said with a sweatdrop.

"Very funny," Lyn said, making a face. "Well, there's latex, amoxicillin..."

"Right.. so I'm just gonna..."

"Not go anywhere," Lyn said firmly.

"Damn it -- what are you, my mom?" Reneey growled.

Lyn shrugged. "Somebody has to be, because you're definitely not responsible."

"Hey! Well, there's this.. How about... Oh, that one time... Well... I'm responsible enough to say no to drinking and smoking! So ha!" Reneey pointed a finger at Lyn.

Lyn rolled her eyes. "You met my parents. That'd turn anyone off to drinking and smoking."

"Yeah, that's true. Well... Oh! I did all of my literature projects!"

"And the other subjects?"

"Exactly."

"What was that about your parents?" Kuronue asked with raised eyebrows.

"Oh, and sulfur! The medicine, not the element..."


	13. Chapter 13

**13. Jerks... AGAIN!?**

So, after a looong time, Kuronue had finally got down everything that Lyn was allergic to. At least, he was pretty sure he had. But before he could talk to Reneey, the lock was picked and there was Youko. Usually Youko didn't come out, but his daughter was here now, so he had decided that he was going to more often.

"Good afternoon. Reneey, I would like to speak with you."

"Okay, but whatever it was, I so totally didn't do it and you have no proof whatsoever!"

"And this time, I can vouch for that," Lyn added, which was indeed something new, since she knew for certain that Reneey hadn't done anything this time.

"Um.. yeah, totally!" Reneey laughed nervously.

"What?" Youko asked, blinking.

"Yeah, so what?" Reneey interrupted.

"I would like to talk to you," Youko repeated.

"Well, go ahead," Lyn said, crossing her arms.

"Alone," Youko said emphatically.

Lyn's right eyebrow shot up. "Excuse me?"

"Alone," Youko repeated. "You know, _just_ Reneey and me. Without you two."

"So do you just not trust me or are you wanting to mess with her head while there's nobody here on her side?"

"No, it's just that I want to talk to her alone. And do you actually think I would really hurt her?" Youko asked, now glaring.

"I don't know. She might accidentally get poisoned again."

"Lyndotia!" Kuronue snapped, wide-eyed.

Lyn's eyes narrowed as she turned to glare at him. "Got a problem?" she growled.

"We already went over this yesterday -- it wasn't Youko's fault!"

"Oh? Did someone tie him up and _make_ him stay in a random deserted place until ten o'clock at night and nearly get my best friend killed?"

"Lyndotia! Show disrespect one more time and you'll be grounded!"

"Grounded from what, precisely? And what the crap makes you think you can ground me to start with?"

While Lyn and Kuronue were busy arguing, Youko had dragged Reneey off.

"So what do you wanna talk about, Daddy?"

"Stuff."

"Like?"

"Well, you know: likes, dislikes, your past... Things that a father needs to know."

"Riiight, and you think I'll just tell you those things? Like now?"

"Yes."

"What the hell makes you think so!?"

"It's not optional."

"Well, then, fuck you," Reneey said, turning to leave.

"A year."

"What?"

"You're grounded for a year and two weeks. Say that again, I dare you to."

"Fuck you."

"Two years."

"Right, and you think you can hold me why?"

"Because I am your father."

"That's it?" Reneey asked, sweatdropping.

"Right -- my human mom couldn't even keep up with me. What makes you think you can, just because you're my dad?"

"Well, one, I'm a _demon_. Second, I am your father. Do you want proof? I can sho --"

"No!"

Youko chuckled.

"Spare me the ewwness," Reneey said with a groan. "But I don't wanna tell!"

"Why not?"

"'Cause."

"Why?"

"'Cause is a reason."

"Not a valid reason."

"Why are you making me do this?" Reneey pouted.

"'Cause I love you," Youko joked.

"But I don't wanna! Besides, I change a lot! The only thing I like is B --"

Then Reneey realized that she was talking to her _dad_.

"Yes?" Youko asked, raising an eyebrow.

"B.. bees! Yes, yellow and black and awesomely awesome colors!" Reneey grinned. _Please buy it, please buy it..._

"You're lying," Youko growled. "Tell me the truth."

"Umm..." _Shit!_ "B as in bees, D as in despair, S as in simultaneously, and M as in memory!" Reneey said really fast. "gtgbyedaddy!"

Youko blinked, then blinked again. _B.. D.. S.. M... Hey, wait!_

"IRINA KURAMA UMBRA!" he thundered, running after Reneey.

"LYN SAVE ME!" Reneey screamed as she hid behind Lyn. "You never knew me, I was never here, I died and am never, ever coming back!"

Lyn blinked and stopped arguing with Kuronue for the moment. "Um.. if I never knew you, how do I explain the fact that I know you're dead? And if you were never here, how could you not be coming _back_?"

"Forget about it and save me!" Reneey pulled Lyn in close, then pulled Kuronue next to Lyn. "You're tall! Hide me!"

"IRINA KURAMA UMBRA!" Youko yelled as he stormed in. "Where is she!?"

Lyn glared. "What, you gonna try to kill her yourself this time?"

"How. Does. She. Know. About. BDSM!?" Youko growled.

Lyn shrugged. "The crap should I know? She knew about that long before I knew her. And, for the record, I take offense that you assume I know and insinuate that I might possibly be behind her knowing. I'm not a perv, thanks."

"Irina! Come out right now!"

"Youko, aren't you taking this a little.. hard?" Kuronue asked, sweatdropping. "What exactly is BDSM, anyway?"

Youko then told Kuronue (while Lyn plugged her ears and hummed a random tune rather loudly), and the bat demon's eyes went wide. "So that's what we did back in the day?"

"AUGH!" Lyn yelled slamming both her palms into her forehead this time. "I so did not need to hear that! Jeez, what is it with you dadgum pervs!?"

"Lynni, save me!"

"Somebody save _me_," Lyn groaned, shaking her head.

"The youngest first!" Reneey whispered.

"Reneey, I know you're behind her! Come out now!"

Lyn forgot about being disgusted for the moment and resumed glaring fiercely at Youko. "I thought we already had a talk about you blowing up at Reneey and scaring her half to death. Shut up, and back off."

"Well, I want to know how and why she knows.. _that_!" Youko declared, glaring back.

Lyn resisted an urge to cross the room and begin beating her head against the wall. "One, I don't know and, quite frankly, I don't want to. Two, if she doesn't want to tell you, I'm not going to make her. And three, I. Said. Back. Off."

"What makes you think you can tell me what to do?" Youko asked. "I want to know how she knows!"

"Youko, calm down," Kuronue said slowly.

Youko sighed and counted to ten. "Are you a virgin, Reneey?"

"WHAT!?" Reneey yelled so loudly that Lyn ducked out of the way with her palms over her ears to avoid having her eardrums burst.

Youko's eyes widened. "So you aren't!?"

"YES I AM A VIRGIN GODDAMN IT! BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU NEED TO KNOW!"

The next thing Youko knew, Lyn, who had dropped out of his line of sight a moment before, suddenly slammed a fist into the side of his head. Kuronue yelled wordlessly and pulled her back, but there was something akin to hatred burning in her eyes.

"NO, LET ME GO! I WANT TO KNOW WHERE IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY HE GETS OFF ASKING A QUESTION LIKE THAT! HOW THE CRAP DO YOU EVEN GET UP THE NERVE!? AND YOU JERKS EXPECT EITHER OF US TO TRUST YOU AS FAR AS WE CAN PICK YOU UP AND THROW YOU!? STUPID DADBURNED _RETARDS_!"

She punctuated this last word by driving her elbow back into Kuronue's stomach; he released her with a grunt of pain, and she grabbed Reneey's arm and stormed out of the room, dragging her friend behind her.

"Ow-ow-ow! Lyn, I have sensitive skin!"


	14. Chapter 14

**14. Not Listening**

"Lynni, where are we going?" Reneey groaned as Lyn pulled her through crowds of random people. Lyn still hadn't let go of her arm, and frankly, it was beginning to annoy her.

"I don't know," Lyn admitted, but she still wore the same grim, fierce look. "And honestly, I really don't care."

Somewhere far away were two demons. One had gravity-defying hair with a white starburst in the middle. (A/N: Lyn: Totally not as awesome as Seto's gravity-defying trench coat! ) He was almost as short as Reneey, dressed in black, and had a white band around his forehead.

The other demon was a tall one with a green shirt and blue jeans -- too ugly to even describe.

"Hiei, where is that Kurama?" Gouki growled at Hiei.

"He said he had to take care of some business," Hiei said, shrugging.

"Well, I'm hungry! So you can wait here, I'm off."

"I really don't care," Hiei said impatiently, and Gouki left.

"Lynni, are you all right? I haven't seen you this angry since Dilan got arrested, or that pervert walked in on you in the shower, or when that lady's dogs killed Gobble."

"Wrong," Lyn said in a vicious snarl. "I wasn't this angry, then."

"So can you tell me where we're going?" Reneey asked with raised eyebrows. "And your nails really do hurt, damn it!"

"I'm sorry," Lyn said, pausing to loosen her grip a bit. Apparently she hadn't noticed just how hard she was holding on, because there were indentations on Reneey's arm and blood dripping from her other hand. She wasn't sure if it was Youko's or if she had been clenching her fist so hard that her nails had dug blood out of her palm. And, really, she didn't care. "I didn't mean to..."

"It's okay. Ain't the first time I've seen blood. Real blood, virtual, movies, which suck by the way, etc." Reneey grinned. "So now what?"

"I don't know what we do now; but I do know what we _don't_ do, and that's listen to any more random jerks."

"Well, that might not be an option, Lyn," Reneey said slowly.

Lyn laughed derisively. "And why's that?"

"Remember that ugly demon dude whose name I keep on forgetting?"

"You mean Gouki?"

"Yeah, him."

"What about him?"

"He's been looking at us for the past two minutes."

Lyn blinked. "And that means I'm going to listen to him because...?"

"I don't, it's just that if he's here, then Hiei must be here, and Lyn, you know we -- or you -- can't take both of them on."

Lyn raised an eyebrow. "And what makes you think they even care that we're here? There are loads of random people. Maybe Gouki's staring at somebody through the shop window behind us."

"No, he was smirking at _us_, Lyn, just us."

Lyn shrugged. "Then let's keep going." She them grasped Reneey's arm -- hard, though not quite as hard as before -- and left, pulling Reneey along again.

Finally they reached a place where they were alone, and Lyn groaned. "You realize we're probably gonna get ambushed or something now because that's the way it always goes in anime shows, right?"

"Yeah, but fangirls are always superior, so maybe we could use fangirl power!" Reneey raised her arm. "Lyn, raise your arm up!"

Lyn blinked, but slowly did as she was told. "Why are we acting like schoolgirls...?"

"'Cause it's fun!"

"Well, well, look who we have here," a voice chuckled.

"Ah, hi, H --"

Lyn covered Reneey's mouth and hissed, "Are you crazy!?"

"Now why are two human girls here all alone?"

"Shows what you know," Lyn muttered.

"No, they are not humans, Gouki," Hiei said slowly. "I sense that they are demons, but dormant, in a way."

His gaze turned to Reneey. "That scent -- I know it. I've smelt it before."

"What are you mumbling about, Hiei?" Gouki asked.

"You, girl!" Hiei pointed at Reneey. "Why do you smell like Kurama?"

"Why do _you_ smell like manure?" Lyn shot back.

"You'll wish you had never said that," Hiei growled.

Reneey grabbed Lyn's shoulder and whispered, "Lyn, don't. Get. Killed!"

"What happened to 'only the bad guys die in this anime'?" Lyn questioned with a smirk and a raised eyebrow, using Reneey's own words against her.. not that she had ever really believed them in the first place.

Just then there was a rustle in the bushes, and out came a green man! ... Okay, not really green, but he was wearing a green jumpsuit!

"Ya know what pisses me off more than the people who do piss me off?" shouted the guy in green. "People going after girls for no apparent reason!"

"Who are you?" Gouki asked.

"Yusuke Urameshi, spirit detective!"

"Oh, so you're Koenma's new lacky," Hiei said.

Lyn nudged Reneey. "I wonder if we can sneak away while they're randomly bantering...?"

"Let's see --"

But before they could make a break for it, Hiei used his supersonic speed to knock them out, grabbed them, and went off to who knows where and we will figure that out in the next chapter, coming soon to a computer screen near you!

And reviews are always welcome!


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: Oh yeah, to all of those who will ask what BDSM means, and for Evil Bunny of death, and Lyn will probably kill me for typing this...

B Bondage/Bind

D Dominate/Discipline

S Submission/Sadism

M Masochism/Master/Mistress (depending on who's on top) and now I shall run because Lyn is gonna have to type this!

Lyn: Argh... It's time like this when I loathe betaing...

Me: So that's how you spell masochism? Never knew that.

Lyn: Let's just get on with the story, perv...

Akantha: Yes! I demand a 10,000 word -- (gets cut off)

--

**15. Clicheness**

Youko and Kuronue were blinking. There was a bruise spreading on Youko's cheek, and Kuronue was clutching his stomach.

"Did.. she just hit us?" Kuronue asked, blinking. "That girl is going to get it now!"

But Youko blinked; he knew why Lyn had hit him. _I can't believe I overreacted again! This is all my fault, again!_

"No."

"What do you mean by no!?"

"I mean that if we go after them now, we'll be in hell. That girl of yours is definitely Kasumi's -- she doesn't hit like a girl. And I don't know about you, but I certainly don't want to die," Youko finished with a glare at his friend.

"So!? What if they're in trouble! What if something happens to them!? Are we just supposed to stay here!?" Kuronue snapped.

Youko pondered this for a moment. "Well, we don-"

But he didn't finish his sentence, because at that moment he felt something, and so did Kuronue. Call it a father's instinct.. or just demonic senses.

--

"Owww," Reneey groaned upon waking up. Her hazel eyes became clear as she took in her surroundings. She and Lyn were in some sort of room, and they had chains on their wrists. The length of the chains was about a foot, and the other end was attatched to the wall.

Lyn woke up a moment later, and blinked at the ceiling several times before murmuring, "Uh.. what just happened...?"

"Hiei is a stereotypical evil person," Reneey said with a sigh. "And he's hot, too." A sigh, then: "Ow! My nail chipped off!"

Reneey went into her pocket and got out a pink-and-black nail file.

"Reneey!" Lyn said with wide eyes. "We can use that to get out!"

"Um, sure.. but I'm not sure how filing my nails is gonna help..."

If Lyn weren't chained, she would have smacked Reneey upside the head several times as the other girl filed her nails.

"No, you idget! I can pick the locks on the shackles with it!"

A blur passed by which took Reneey's nail file.

"Hey! You made me get a hang nail!"

"Don't even bother trying to get out of those," Hiei said, smirking and tossing the nail file in the air. "They only come off if I'm weakened, or if I take them off myself."

"So _why_ did you kidnap us?" Lyn asked with raised eyebrows.

"'Cause I can," Hiei said, shrugging.

"Slasher!" Reneey accused.

"What in all of demon world is a slasher?" Hiei asked.

"Slasher fics are yaoi fics, but it could also mean killing or stealing or doing bad things just for the heck of it," Reneey announced, grinning.

Lyn promptly began banging her head against the wall.

"Argh," Lyn growled, gritting her teeth, as she felt something coming out of her back. Since her wings needed more room, the end of her wing was bent, which was definitely not a great feeling. Meanwhile, Reneey switched into demon form, too.

"So I was right," Hiei mused. "But why do you look like Youko?" he asked, gazing strangely at Reneey.

"Yo, demon dude!" Lyn growled. "Do something about these chains, would you?"

"No, not until this girl tells me why," Hiei said.

"No, Reneey," Lyn ordered, quickly and firmly.

"But --"

"No!"

"Fine, then," Hiei said with a shrug. "Stay that way."

"I will."

"But, Lyn! Your wings will stay bent forever, and you won't be able to fly straight or quickly, and what if you need to fly to get out of a situation!? And then you'll die and I'll be depressed and it would be all my fault and uncle will hate me 'cuz I could've prevented your death and I didn't!" Reneey said all in one breath.

Lyn laughed darkly. "Like I care what he thinks, he's just like all the others," she growled, now digging her fingernails into her palms to keep her mind off the pain in her wing. Well, on the bright side, she now knew that she had been right about the blood on her hand being her own, because she was now reopening the same wounds in her right palm.

"Like jerks? Well, they arn't really _jerk jerk jerk jerks_, they mean well, but that makes them be jerks," Reneey said quietly. "I mean, they care, so..."

"Care, right," Lyn spat sarcastically through gritted teeth. "About as much as my parents do..."

"Your parents care," Reneey said slowly. "From what I saw, they do."

Lyn momentarily forgot about both her wing and bleeding palm as she stared at Reneey. "Are you serious? I don't know what parents you've been watching, but they sure weren't mine!"

"Then who were the ones whose house you went to those.. uh.. couple of times? Who are the ones that.. um.. er.. wait, give me a minute... well... they... give you presents?"

Lyn chuckled darkly and closed her eyes as if trying to remember the last time they had done that. "They haven't given me a thing but grief in.. oh.. seven years?"

"Hugged? Said 'I love you'? Seen? Er.. talked to? I mean, I can't talk to mine, not that I would really want to.. but you're lucky! They lived next door!"

"Which is precisely why it's worse when I _didn't_ see them," Lyn said with a sigh.


	16. Chapter 16

**16. RPG?**

"Would you bakas shut up!?" Hiei snapped. "You halfbreeds are just as pathetic as humans!"

"Like you're th --"

Lyn stopped Reneey's sentence with a smack to the side of her head that she could actually reach at the moment.

"Oww..."

"What do you mean by 'halfbreeds'?" Lyn asked Hiei, who raised his eyebrows.

"You don't know?"

"No, I'm asking for my own entertainment," Lyn growled sarcastically.

"Well, since you aren't going to live that long, anyway, I might as well tell you. You, girl --" He pointed at Reneey -- "are a mix of silver and ice fox, and you --" He pointed at Lyn -- "are a mix of fire and shadow."

"Wow, fits so perfectly," Reneey said, grinning; then she whined, "But I wanna make things go on fire..."

"Oh, _that_," Lyn said, rolling her eyes. "You're a little late with the newsflash. You're almost as bad as _him_, going on about 'fire and shadow,' making me sound like a Balrog." She put on her best fake Saruman voice, gave Reneey a shifty sort of sideways glance, and whispered, "Shadow.. and flame!"

"Right. Well, I'm going to go find a certain detective. Have fun." Hiei chuckled as he left, slamming the door with an ominous sort of sound.

"So.. what's up, Lynni?"

"Oh, just hanging around," Lyn grumbled sarcastically, trying to shift her shoulders around to shrug her wing out of its uncomfortable position.. but it wasn't working so well.

"Any time now, somebody'll save us," Reneey said. "... Any time now... So, in the mean time.. wanna.. rant?"

"Not really. I want to kick myself for not sleeping last night, not eating anything today, and wasting my energy on arguing and punching that jerk. Well, maybe not for punching him; he deserved it, a -- aaaauuugh!"

Lyn's sentence drifted off into a wordless expression of pain as her struggles only succeeded in pinning her wing into an even worse position. Now it was no longer just the throbbing, but a sharp pain shooting down the side of her back.

"Okay.. mmnnph.. that.. hurt a bit..." She let out her breath in a sharp exhalation. "Yeah.. I'm.. gonna.. stop that, now..."

"Goddamn it, this chunk of hair always gets in my mouth," Reneey growled as she pulled a pink bobby pin out of her pocket.

"Reneey!" Lyn said, wide-eyed.

"Yeah?"

"Give that to me!"

"... Why...?"

"So I can pick the lock!"

"But then my hair will get into my mouth and I'll choke!"

"RENEEY!"

"Yes?" Reneey asked, blinking. "I mean, here, ya can have it..."

She made to give it to Lyn, but tripped over her shoelace, thus dropping the pin and sending it flying about a meter away from the girls.

Lyn's eye twitched. "Reneey, tell me that did not just happen."

"Good news! I still have my green bobby pen! But I dented it when I fell..."

"Reneey, would it kill you NOT to destroy everything that you have!?"

"Not my fault..."

Lyn let out an exasperated mixture of a sigh and a groan. "Remind me to keep lock picking tools in my pocket from now on..."

Suddenly a door opened and this ugly red-horned demon stepped in. "Master Hiei told me to watch you wenches."

"What's a wence?" Reneey asked, blinking.

"It's not wence, it's wench," Lyn said with a sigh. "To wince is like flinching, it's not even a noun."

"So what's a wench?"

Lyn gave Reneey a sideways look. "You remember that question your dad asked you earlier?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Okay... now, if your answer had been the opposite..."

"Oooh," Reneey said. "Hey, Lynni, check this out! I saw it on Ella Enchanted!"

She grinned as she turned to face the demon and asked, "So, who are you?"

"I'm Kazi -- Hiei's second in command!"

"Right, well ya do know that he wants another, stronger one?"

Kazi's eyes widened. "IMPOSSIBLE!"

"Yeah! Ya see, this demon named.. er... Chains! Yeah, Chains says he can, like, out strong you!"

"No way! I'm strnoger than this puny Chain guy!"

"Well, prove it," Reneey said, grinning. "Chains can knock down that door, unchain us, and chain himself to.. that pole over there and get out!"

Kazi hmphed. "I can do that! Besides, Hiei gave me the ability to take off those chains if one of you disobeys!"

And so Kazi did just what Reneey said, much to Lyn's dumbfounded amazement and Reneey's amusement.

"Cya!" they yelled together.

"HEY, GET BACK HERE!" Kazi yelled, but Reneey and Lyn were already running.

"Reneey, I blame you!"

"Why me!?"

Suddenly they ran into a dead end; Kazi and other possessed demons surrounded the girls.

"Got any other plans, o great one?" Lyn asked sarcastically.

"Um.. give me a min," Reneey said.

"WE DON'T HAVE A MINUTE!"

Reneey looked around and pointed in a random direction. "PINK EVIL SQUIRRELS WITH PRETTY SHARP KNIVES AND GREEN SKULLS!"

Lyn blinked, but the demons looked behind him, and the girls ran again.

"Reneey, you come up with the worst-ever distractions," Lyn hissed as they stopped in a dark corner to catch their breath. Well, Reneey did; Lyn stood there and glared at her.

"Well, they bought it!" Reneey hmphed. "I didn't need _you_ to buy it, I needed _them_ to!"

"Hey! How did you girls get out!?" Gouki growled, appearing from nowhere.

"Because apparently you people have really stupid lackeys," Lyn said, rolling her eyes.

"Um," Reneey said slowly, "I so totally saw this on the Abridged Series."

She again pointed her figner in a random direction and yelled, "LOOK! A DISTRACTION!"

Lyn smacked herself in the forehead and Gouki blinked. "You think that's going to fool me?"

"Well, it worked in the Abridged Series!"

"We're not in the Abridged Series, Reneey," Lyn groaned.

Suddenly a dark chuckle came from somewhere behind the first demon. "Gouki, go somewhere. Have a feast or something."

Gouki grumbled and left, knowing that if he didn't, Hiei would get mad, and he didn't want that.

"It seems I figured out your little secrets," Hiei smirked.

"And?" Lyn asked with raised eyebrows.

"Ya know ya can't hurt us, right?" Reneey asked, grinning. "'Cuz then Youko will be all like murderish and you won't want that."

Lyn planted her palm in the middle of her forehead. "You do realize that was probably a complete lie and he was just waiting for one of us to say something.. right?"

"Oh.. oops," Reneey said, grinning.

"So you are Youko's daughter, and you," Hiei turned to Lyn, "are his partner's daughter. Hn."

Hiei knew he had to get rid of them; being dead was not his top priority. "Both of you -- leave. Now."

And he turned and again disappeared into the darkness. It was definitely a blow to his pride, to have to let them go; if they were anyone else, he would have killed them on the spot.

Reneey blinked. "So.. now what?"

Lyn shrugged. "Find some way to get out?"

"Sure," Reneey said, grinning.

"Wait," Lyn said slowly, grabbing Reneey's arm to stop her. "Aren't we forgetting something?"

"Like?"

"Like we're still in demon form. And I don't know about you, but I have little to no clue about how to change back. One time I kinda poked my wing and then it like randomly disappeared... But that wouldn't be very fun at the moment," Lyn concluded with a dark look at the offending wing. It still hurt like the devil.. not that she would admit that.

"But won't it be a bad thing if we aren't in demon form?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Lyn twitched. "Only if there are only demons anywhere around. Which I kinda doubt. Especially considering I have no clue where the crap we go from here.. not that I did to start with... but whatever..."

"Hey, Lynni, looki! A light!" Reneey said, pointing.

Lyn blinked. "Reneey, I think you found the door."

"I did? Awesomely awesome!"

So, they went through the door and they were outside.

"So.. where do we go from here, Lynni?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Lyn bit her lip and sighed. "Honestly? ... I have no idea."

"So let's go in a random direction?" Reneey asked.

"And if we run into humans?"

"RPG?"

Lyn might have banged her head, but she didn't have anything to hit it against... and, anyway, she really didn't want it hurting, too.


	17. Chapter 17

**17. Threats and Healing**

Youko growled as he searched high and low for the girls. _Where in the seven hells are they!? I can't even sniff them out or sense them!_ His eyes pierced his surroundings, but showed him no signs of his daughter and goddaughter. Finally he umped down from the tree branch he was standing on and landed on the ground, and Kuronue flew down to meet him.

"Any luck?"

Kuronue just shook his head.

Youko sighed and muttered, "I can just hear Ruby and Kasumi yelling at us..."

"Let's continue looking," Kuronue said resignedly; Youko sighed, but before either of them could move --

"LYNNI! Your wing just hit me in the face!" Reneey growled.

"Like I can help it! And it already hurts enough, dadburn it! Try to bite it again and I'll rip those fox ears off and make you eat them!"

"Then I'll cut out your akleas!" Reneey snapped back.

"For the last time, it's an Achilles --"

But Youko's and Kuronue's eyes suddenly widened and the next thing Lyn and Reneey knew they were being hugged tighter than they ever had been in their entire lives.

"HELLO, DAMAGED WING HERE, YOU IMBECILE!" Lyn yelled at Kuronue, trying and failing to whack him upside the head because her arms were currently pinned to her sides. "LET GO OF ME, DADBURN IT!"

Kuronue's eyes widened as he let go of her, turned her around, and proceeded to gently check her wings. He himself had bruised, cut, and even broken wings before -- not a fun feeling.

"What happened!?" he asked.

"Long story, and why the crap should I tell you, anyway?" Lyn growled, jerking away and sending him a death glare.

"Because you're my daughter and you're hurt!" Kuronue declared, and his eyes darkened. "Whoever did it, I'll tear them limb from limb! And if you don't want your wing to hurt, I suggest you stop moving and let me see!"

"So what did happen to you girls?" Youko asked, but Reneey pushed away from him.

"Why should you care, if you think I'm such a slut?"

"I never said that!"

"You implied it!"

"How!?"

"By asking that question! Friends ask that question, not parents!"

"Jeez, _I've_ never even asked that question, and I'm her effing best friend!" Lyn cut in, glaring viciously at Youko. Then she frowned at Reneey and added, "And this is the last time you decide which way we're going. You walk us right into the same idgets we've been trying to get away from!"

"Well.. okay, fine! My fault, damn it!" Reneey pouted. "But it's not like you did anything! I did all of the work!"

"Oh, yes, because making horrible distractions and losing both of the two items I could've used to pick locks constitutes hard work..."

"Wait, pick a lock?" Youko asked, twitching. "You two tell us what happened, _now_!"

"No," Reneey pouted.

"I've got news for you, jerk," Lyn growled, "you could actually develop manners right now and I wouldn't tell you squat. I don't care what the crap you say anymore, just bug off."

Youko sighed. "Look, we only want to protect you two, and you're our daughters, which makes you a target for other demons. Even though they think we're dead, they will find out the truth one day, and we don't want that to happen _again_."

Then Kuronue added, "So when we're overprotective, it's only because we care."

He started to gently straighten out Lyn's wing, and she let out a hiss.

"Ssh. Just relax and it won't be as painful."

Lyn growled wordlessly and a muscle at her cheekbone twitched.

"But why must you be jerks?" Reneey pouted.

Youko sighed and shook his head.

"Youko, we need to get to my house," Kuronue said. "Lyn, you've sprained a joint in your wing, and somehow you've managed to slice it open, too. It must be treated, otherwise it will get infected. And that's not a good feeling."

He then picked her up and began to fly, much to Lyn's indignation.

"The crap do you think you're doing!? I CAN WALK, YOU MORON!"

"Walking would take longer!" Kuronue snapped. "I have to treat it quickly!"

"I can take care of myself!"

"Do you even know how to treat it? If you don't do it properly, then your wing will break, and if that's not healed properly, it could fall off!"

"I don't effing care! Get your hands off me!"

"Look, I don't care if you don't care -- _I_ do! Now, why won't you just trust me that I won't hurt you!?"

There was hurt in Kuronue's eyes as he landed at his house, kicked the door open, and put her down on the couch.

Lyn laughed darkly, sounding cold and humorless. "Because it's a lie. That's what people do."

"It's not a lie," Kuronue sighed.

After many minutes, Lyn's wings were healed, and Kuronue left for his room, muttering, "You're welcome to the fridge or something."

As Kuronue was leaving, he had tears welling in his eyes that he refused to let fall in front of his daughter.

Lyn sighed deeply and wrapped her arms around her legs, resting her chin on her knees and closing her weary eyes. She was tired, and she was even beginning to get hungry, but she didn't care. Where was Reneey? And what on earth were they going to do now?


	18. Chapter 18

**18. Facing the Past, Part I**

Reneey walked into the house after Youko had walked her there and left for his own home and blinked as she sat down next to Lyn. "Hey, chi okay? How's your wing?"

"There you are!" Lyn said, looking relieved. "The moron didn't nearly get you killed again, then?"

"No," Reneey said, blinking. "Lynni, you need to stop putting me ahead of you! Did you even eat? You look like skin and bones! ... Okay, not really, but still!"

Reneey sighed. She appreciated Lyn's sisterly overprotection, but sometimes it just got annoying. And it made it even more annoying that Lyn always cared for Reneey before herself.

"I'm _fine_," Lyn said, shaking her head. "I don't want anything from that jerk, anyway, except for him to leave me alone."

"No, you're not fine! Lyn, tell me one thing that makes him a jerk!" Reneey challenged. It probably wasn't a good idea, but she was determined to get Lyn to see her dad as a dad and not as an enemy.

"He thinks I'm four years old, for one," Lyn growled darkly. "He expects me to respect him just because he says he's my father. Like that's an original line. He defends Youko for being a jerk. He thinks I should trust him without him giving me any reason to do so. Oh, and I'm also supposed to spill my guts about my entire life and at the same time completely disregard it, because _it doesn't matter anymore_. Are those enough reasons for you, Reneey?"

"Well, you know he cares for you, Lyn! He won't just leave like your human dad did! He went out looking for you! Don't you think that says something!?"

Reneey knew she was dancing around a dangerous line, but at the moment, she didn't care. Unfortunately, as far as Lyn was concerned, she was about to cross it. Lyn stiffened and her fists clenched. There was that fire in her eyes again; only once before had she ever really been angry at Reneey.

"You want to play this game?" she asked in a lethal whisper. "Fine. Believe whatever the crap you want to, Irina Umbra, but I'm not going through that again. And nobody -- not even you -- is going to make me."

She made for the door, but when she turned the handle, the door wouldn't budge. Growling, she checked the locks, but none of them were turned; Youko had somehow managed to lock it from the outside. Frustrated, she slammed the flat of her hand against the door and yelled, "THIS IS NOT HELPING YOUR CASE, YOU DADBURNED MORONS!"

One wordless scream and several more blows to the door later, Lyn turned and stalked out of the room, probably looking for another exit.

Reneey sighed. There was really nothing more she could do other than make Lyn even angrier, so she just turned on the TV and watched whatever the hell was on.

_With Lyn_

Lyn was currently pacing in general circles. She had already cracked her neck, knuckles, wrists, ankles, and toes as well as nearly punching a hole in a wall, but she had yet to feel any better. It was to be expected that there would be more retarded people with more reasons why she should trust them or other pointless crap. But now Reneey, too!?

But, no. She wasn't going through with this again. She had taken a lot of blows and fought a lot of battles for Reneey, but the aftermath from that was temporary: cuts, bruises, the occasional dislocated joint. And it wasn't like she hadn't faced those kinds of things before. But this, what Reneey was asking her to do now, it was beyond that.

And Lyn didn't think she could go through it again.

As Lyn walked, she paused for a moment to rest her forehead against the wall and sigh. But then she frowned upon hearing a faint noise -- that sounded like someone _crying_. It was soft, and if Lyn didn't have her bat ears, she probably wouldn't have caught it. Nonetheless, she decided to follow it -- and found herself facing the door of Kuronue's room.

The crease between her eyebrows deepened. That was.. strange. She tentatively placed a hand on the door, and it moved; apparently it had been pushed up, but not completely closed. Probably an accident, Lyn thought, eyeing it curiously.

Kuronue was sitting in bed with silent tears pouring down his face. He hadn't cried this much since his mate died, but now he was crying because his daughter, his and Kasumi's little girl, was accusing him of lying when, in truth, he cared greatly for her and was only acting out of love.

He didn't notice Lyn as she walked slowly, almost cautiously, inside. Her right eyebrow was slightly raised and there was a strange look on her face. When it became obvious that he wasn't going to realize she was there, Lyn asked quietly, in an admittedly somewhat more gentle voice than before, "What's wrong with _you_?"

Kuronue jumped. He quickly wiped away his tears and then met his daughter's gaze.

"What do you mean?"

Lyn crossed her arms and heaved an exasperated sigh. "I'm not any more blind or deaf than I am helpless, you know."

"Nothing is wrong with me -- but how's your wing?"

"Don't give me the crap. You're as bad a liar as Reneey."

"But.. I should be more worried about you. Are you feeling better?"

Kuronue tried his best not to let his tears fall, but some managed to escape, anyway, and so he lowered his gaze.

Lyn frowned. "You don't get it, do you? I'm not fragile. I've had worse scrapes from angry fourth graders. Heck, I've been worse off from encounters with tropical fruit. Now tell me what the crap's the matter already."

"It's just.. I really do care for you, Lyn. I know sometimes I might be an ass, but I really do care, and love you. I don't ever want you to get hurt."

_And you're doing a great job on that so far,_ she thought sarcastically, but she merely looked grim and muttered, "Yeah, well, you're a bit late for that, sorry..."

"Yeah." He sighed. "But, listen, Lyn.. I really do care for you, okay? I would never lie to you about that, _never_."

Lyn shook her head and said coldly, "And if I hadn't heard that a thousand times by now, it might be easier to believe."

His gaze flicked up, and he looked straight into her eyes. "I know the pain you must feel. Believe me, I felt that before I met your mother. But when I say I care about someone, I mean it. Lyn, look me in the eyes and tell me if you think I'm lying."

Lyn's eyes were completely unreadable as they stared into his, and her voice was unusually quiet when she answered abruptly, "No. But I haven't been the best judge of that in the past, either."

Kuronue grasped her hand and smiled a bit, taking it as an encouraging sign when she twitched but did not pull away. "Lyn, just trust me. Just this once. I promise you that I will never hurt you."

Just then.. CRASH! "NOT MY FAULT!" was heard.

Lyn twitched. Her left eye twitched, a muscle at her cheekbone twitched, and she had a random desire to whack herself in the forehead. Yes, apparently no matter what, Reneey was still Reneey.

"UM... IF YOU SEE A VASE MISSING... IT'S NOT 'CAUSE IT GOT SHATTERED! IT'S CUZ... IT WENT POOF! YEAH!"

Kuronue raised his eyebrows at Lyn, who suddenly turned and yelled indignantly, "HEY! STOP BEING A LINE THIEF, DADBURN IT!"

"WHAT LINE DID I STEAL!?"

"IT WENT POOF!? SERIOUSLY! NEXT THING YOU'LL BE SAYING YOU'RE WCWL!"

"HEY! I DO NOT SAY I'M WCWL! I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT YOU SAID THAT! NEVER LISTENING TO BOTH SIDES OF THE STORY! SO THE VASE DIDN'T SHATTER, IT FLEW AWAY! HAPPY, MISS WHO-DOESN'T-LISTEN-TO-BOTH-SIDES-OF-THE-STORY AND WHO NOW HAS HONKY TONK BADONKADONK IN MY HEAD!"

Kuronue sweatdropped. "HAVE YOU ALL FORGOTTEN THAT I'M A BAT DEMON!?"

"No," Lyn said, shrugging. "This is just the acceptable form of communication. It's either this or cell phones." She paused to blink. "I wonder how our cells even work here...?"

"YES, I BLAME YOU, LYN, IF I START SINGING HONKY TONK BADONKADONK!"

Lyn rolled her eyes and muttered, "You could at least get an awesomer song stuck in your head... Like a Guns n Roses song..."

"Ya know, in Welcome to the Jungle, the ah ah ahh ahh sounds like he's having sex..."

"Thank you, resident pervert," Lyn said, shaking her head and sighing.

Kuronue sighed. "I'm going to go downstairs and make sure Reneey doesn't kill herself.. or destroy anything else..."

And so he walked off, thinking, _Ruby always had that amazing power..._

Lyn sighed and shook her head. She would almost have been glad to go back home already, where things were at least somewhat comprehensible. Almost.

Kuronue was downstairs, sweatdropping and twitching. "Reneey... How exactly did that vase break?"

"Er.. it went kaboom."

"How did it go kaboom?"

"Like... KABOOM!"

"I didn't mean that!" Kuronue said exasperatedly, shaking his head.

Well, it was obvious that he wasn't going to get anywhere with _this_ line of questioning, so he changed topic: "Hey, Reneey.. I need to ask you a question."

"Mkay?"

"What do you know about Lyn's past?" he asked in a whisper. Unfortunately for him, Lyn just happened to be coming down the stairs at that point, and she had to fight a sudden desire to knock Kuronue a good one. Oh, and her eye started twitching again. Lovely.

Reneey saw Lyn, and her eyes widened. Great! Now it's like yesterday all over again!

"Err... I'm.. hungry, be right back!"

And so she darted off, and Kuronue blinked before turning around and noticing Lyn, as well.

"You can't just leave well enough alone, can you?" she growled, fighting to keep from clenching her fists in anger; she really didn't need to open those cuts from her fingernails again. "And you don't even have the guts to ask me straight up! You wanna know about my life? _Fine_! Sit down and ask your dadburned questions and for the sake of all that is good and holy, _don't interrupt me_!"

Kuronue blinked, then fell silent and listened closely to what Lyn would say.

It probably would have been better if she had yelled, but when Lyn was angry -- really, truly angry -- she didn't scream. She spoke in a low, dangerous voice that dripped with venom (and often sarcasm) and showed just how close she was to really losing it.

"You asked about my parents. Well, I don't know where you get off calling them that, to be perfectly honest. I saw them maybe a couple of times a year, if I was lucky. Or unlucky, really. The only thing I ever was for them was an excuse to get married and something to show off when it turned out I wasn't a complete moron. They live in a trailer next door and sit and smoke and drink and generally act like they're from a bad after-school special. They only crawl out of that godforsaken hole when they want something, usually either money or to bum food from some sort of holiday dinner.

"So _that's_ why I grew up at my grandparents', okay? Because a couple of scumbags who think they're still teenagers don't give a crap, and I gave up on caring what they thought years ago. So you'll just have to forgive me if I'm not too keen on the idea of putting up with all that again because of some retarded destiny-reincarnation nonsense that I never even belived in, because I'm not going to apologize for protecting myself and staying alive. Now, what else would you like to know, while I'm in such a _sharing_ mood?"

Earlier, upon spilling one of her most guarded secrets -- whether she admitted how she really felt about it or not -- Lyn probably would have had tears in her eyes. But she hadn't cried for them, or anything else, in years; and, at the moment, the fury in them was burning too fiercely to allow for tears, anyway.

Kuronue was in shock. His little girl had gone through _that_ pain!? He moved quickly to hug her and pull her close, like any father would do when their child is hurting.

"Lyn, I'm so sorry," he whispered. "I never would have imagined -- please, forgive me?"

He still couldn't believe this. Was she going to hate him forever because he had all but made her tell her story?

"What does it even matter?" Lyn growled through clenched teeth. Somehow the dam she had built over the years for her tears had suddenly acquired a crack; she could feel their salty warmth welling up in her eyes. It was a strange feeling. For a long time, she had wondered if she had forgotten how to cry.

Kuronue rubbed circles on her back, whispering, "Shh. It's okay, Lyn. Just let it out, okay?"

"No, it's not," Lyn objected, digging her fingernails into her palms again and reopening the cuts for the second or third time already today. It wasn't really smart, but at least it served as a distraction from that relentless ache in her chest. "Not this time. I'm not a child any more."

_I don't need them, or anyone else,_ the fierce part of her personality said ruthlessly. _I never did. If I had, I wouldn't have made it this long._

_Then why does it still hurt?_ whispered the gentler side. But neither of the contradictory voices had an answer for that question.

"But Lyn, if you just linger with all your pain, how will you be able to see who cares for you? I care, Reneey cares, Youko cares.. in his own way... Just give me a chance, and I promise you -- I even promise to, what do humans call it? ... Starts with a g... God, that's it! -- that I will not do that to you."

Lyn closed her eyes and thought sadly, _He doesn't even realize what he's asking. Reneey doesn't, either. I guess I play strong too well. They don't understand that one more chance may be all I have left to give._

Most people don't realize that there are many ways to have your heart broken, and only some of those have anything to do with a guy. And, if it came to having the strength to pick up the pieces again.. well, Lyn just didn't know if she could do that once more.

And yet her heart, and her pride, wouldn't let her back away.

"All right," she said at last, with a lot more bravado than she felt. "One chance. Mess it up, and you die."

_Assuming I can make it through that again._

Kuronue just smiled.

When he finally let her out of the hug, he asked, "Now, are you hungry?"

"Wait.. where's Reneey?" Lyn asked suspiciously.

"She.. said something about.. being hungry.

Lyn's eyes widened. "You let her in the kitchen!? Alone!?"

KABOOM!

"RENEEY!"

"I DIDN'T DO IT! HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT IF I PUT CHEESE ON THE PAN IT WOULD EXPLODE!?"

"DID YOU TAKE OFF THE PLASTIC!?"

"..."

"Reneey?"

"... It's.. sticky plastic... Wouldn't come off!"

"RENEEY!"


	19. Chapter 19

**19. Facing the Past, Part II**

So after cleaning up the cheese mess, and Lyn scolding Reneey, it was late in the afternoon. Kuronue had left to go to the "library" (if you catch my drift), thus leaving Lyn and Reneey alone.

"So, did ya kill him or give him bruises?" Reneey asked.

Lyn blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Weren't you pissed off at uncle?"

There was a moment's silence, and then Lyn said slowly, "I was..."

"And?" Reneey pushed on, curious to find out Lyn's answer.

"And... I'm giving him a chance."

Lyn watched the grin spread across Reneey's face before adding quietly, almost as if this itself were a great secret, "I told him, Rea."

"Wait.. you mean.. _all_ of it!?"

Reneey was shocked. Lyn told almost no one about her past. Only the people she really cared for.. and really trusted.

Lyn tugged on a loose string on the sofa and didn't look at her friend as she said slowly, "If you mean my parents.. then yeah."

"Um... awesome..ly... awesome?" Reneey didn't really know what to say.

Lyn closed her eyes and chuckled darkly. "I don't know yet. I guess we'll see."

"So, whatcha wanna do?" Reneey asked, poking Lyn in the arm. Just then the door was unlocked, and in walked Youko.

Lyn sweatdropped. "You know, there's this awesome thing called knocking..."

Youko just shrugged and asked, "So, Lyn.. how's your wing?"

"Better," Lyn muttered, and Youko switched his gaze to Reneey.

"Reneey, I would like to ask you a question.. and get a real answer, this time."

Reneey blinked; Lyn knew that question...

"What happened in your past?" Youko asked again.

Reneey blinked. "Err... Why exactly do you need to know that?"

"Because I'm your father."

"Riiight..."

Reneey looked at Lyn, who looked uncomfortably from Reneey to Youko and back to Reneey before asking slowly, "So.. um.. should I.. go.. or...?"

She let the question trail off. This was still entirely up to Reneey; Lyn certainly wasn't going to try to force her into anything, but she didn't want to sit there, either.

"I don't know! Argh, why must a thirteen-year-old girl go through this!?" Reneey groaned, then looked at Lyn. "Did I ever tell _you_ my past? I can't even remember.. which is sad..."

She giggled a bit, and Lyn smiled slightly. "About as much as I've told you, I guess."

"Did I tell you about my life in Russia? Well.. it used to be part of Russia..."

"Nope," Lyn said, shaking her head.

"I didn't? ... Wow..."

Youko raised his eyebrows. "So, are you telling me or not?"

"Meh, why not?" Reneey asked, shrugging. "Lynni, you stay, too. Chances are I'll forget whatever I'll say..."

Lyn nodded and shifted, a little uncomfortably, into a corner of the couch, where she sat cross-legged and resumed tugging on the frayed fabric.

"Let's see.. where do I start.. err.. well... I lived in Usbaktaion."

Youko blinked. "Huh?"

"She means Uzbekistan," Lyn said with a double sweatdrop. "Seriously, as her father, you should really learn the dialects of Reneey..."

"Err, well, my house was big. I had two rooms. We had.. let's see if I remember this correctly... Sixteen fish, fifteen birds, two cats, two rabbits, and a dog. My human mom's favorite was the fish, my sister's was the rabbit, mine was the cat, and my dad's was the dog. I cannot remember or pronounce their names, so don't even bother asking."

"Reneey, are you sure you didn't live on a farm?" Youko asked, blinking.

"Yes, I'm sure, damn it!" Reneey pouted.

"So, let's see. I was terrified of my dog..."

"So that explains it," Lyn muttered. "Why every time you see a dog, you hide somewhere..."

"I swear, your dog growled and winked at me! _Winked_!"

Lyn rolled her eyes. "Her _name_ is Wink, Reneey! What, you think she was only named that because of the one-brown-eye-one-half-brown-half-blue thing?"

"Well, your mom's dog chased me around! And my friend's dog humps people! For real, it does!" Reneey screeched.

"Well, it's no surprise," Youko said, shrugging.

"DADDY!"

Lyn's eye twitched. "My mother's dog.. is _chihuahua_.. and _pomeranian_, Reneey... He doesn't even weigh five pounds!"

"Well, he scratches hard!"

Lyn sweatdropped and raised her left hand to the light. "Okay, I have five scars from a dog bite where I couldn't use my hand for a month, and I still love dogs..."

"Can we please get back to the topic?" Youko asked, sweatdropping, too.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sure, Daddy," Reneey said. "Um.. so I don't remember shit other than that, so I'll just jump. When I was four, I moved to New York, then to New Jersey, then when I was five I moved to Russia, then to New Jersey, then to New York, then to New Jersey, and now to Pennsylvania!" Reneey said all in one breath. "Done!"

"That's not enough," Youko said, narrowing his eyes.

"Is too! Lyn, isn't that enough?"

Lyn shrugged. "If that's all you want to say, then yeah, it's enough. It's _your_ past, Rea."

"Reneey," Youko growled, and Lyn turned to snarl wordlessly at him.

"Fine!" Reneey pouted. "My human mother is a fucking hypocrite who emotionally and verbally abused me without even knowing it, my dad left for money when I was five and I only see him a few weeks a year and he just expects me to be all lovey-dovey, my sister left for college when I was six, she got married and had a kid and she just expects me to be all lovey-dovey when she left me, the people at school are all assholes, and the therapist says I'm showing symptoms of depression when I'm not, and if it wasn't for that table standing in our way, I would've shoved her fake blond hair down her fucking throat, people think I'm damned in despair, my favorite teacher turned out to be a bitch, and the guy I loved was an asshole. Me and my mom went to visit Lynni, then the next day she left me there," Reneey growled out all very quickly. "You try saying that with a Russian accent. Now, do you wanna know between the lines?"

Lyn promptly became very interested in that frayed thread on the sofa again just as Reneey concluded simply, "Oh, and my parents yelled every day and my sister joined in, too, so that did some emotional damage."

"Therapist?" Youko asked, blinking.

"The stupid school counselor thinks I'm damaged, despairing, violent, and dark," Reneey sweatdropped. "And apparently so does my teacher. I mean, that fucker deserved it when I said I'd shove his finger down his throat if he didn't stop pointing at me!"

"Well, they're half right," Lyn said, looking up with a look that was a strange mixture of serious and joking. "Violent; meh, who isn't? Dark.. maybe a little. But they call you damaged and despairing while I'm sitting there and they'll be picking their teeth up off the floor."

"So, wanna come with me to my school in PA?" Reneey asked, grinning.

"So that's.. your life story?" Youko asked, shocked -- just as shocked as Kuronue had been. Then he rushed to Reneey and hugged her. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you!"

"Um.. Lyn.. help.. can't.. breathe," Reneey said between gasps.

"Now you know how I felt," Lyn said, wrinkling her nose and poking Youko in the shoulder. "You know, if you kill her, I'm so gonna kill you..."

Youko paid no mind to Lyn; he was just concerned with his daughter. "You're not hurt, are you?"

Reneey then glared at him and shoved him away. "So you're another of the fuckers who thinks I need help? I seriously think that there's only three people I've ever met that don't think I need help!"

Reneey stomped the ground and left, grumbling insults and curses.

"Lynni, I need to vent! Come with me and beat up random people!"

Lyn sweatdropped. "Er, Rea? You know the door's locked? I kind of wound up bleeding on it from trying to knock it down when I already had cuts on my hands, remember?"

"I read this in a fanfic..." Reneey lifted her foot and kicked the door open. "Yeah, fangirls are superior. Now come on!" And she grabbed Lyn and dragged her outside.

Youko knew that if he wanted to keep his hearing, he shouldn't follow them.

Reneey was walking down many streets, dragging Lyn along with her. "I swear, only you, J, and Kel don't think I need help!" She then stopped and turned to Lyn. "You don't think I need help, do you?"

Lyn grinned. "What, like psychiatric help? Not on your life! Insanity rocks, and randomness makes the world go 'round. But you might need some help in learning to abide by the normal laws of physics," she joked. Then she paused and looked thoughtful. "You know, this is really ironic. Last time, it was me dragging you around..."

"Screw the laws of physics! .. Wait, what are the laws of physics? The gravity one..."

Lyn sweatdropped. "Never mind. I would ask where we're going, but the last time you asked that, we wound up getting kidnapped, so... uh... what's up?"

"That fucker, that's what's up! I don't mind telling my past, but when they make up that comment, it's like that fake blond therapist all over again! I mean, seriously!"

"Okay, apparently that's the wrong question," Lyn said, blinking. "Um.. okay.. so..." She paused and sighed exasperatedly. "I don't even know any more..."

"I mean, did you dad imply that you need help!?"

"Um.. maybe I'm completely lost, but... how does asking if you're hurt imply you need help? That you're somehow weak or something, maybe, but if you're just now figuring out that they think we can't handle ourselves, you're in trouble."

"It does mean it! I wasn't physically hurt, it was emotionally, and when he asked that, it's like he thinks I'm emotionally damaged!"

Lyn frowned. "Um.. Rea? Loathe though I am to defend the jerk... you kind of said that yourself."

"But that doesn't mean I'm damaged or I need help! I'm emotionally challenged 'cause that means emo! In fact, I don't even call myself emo, I call myself stereotypical emo, so I'm stereotypically emotionally challenged!"

Reneey then stalked off and Lyn blinked after her. "Oi, woman, why must you confuzzle me...?"

"BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I'M DAMAGED OR I NEED HELP!" Reneey yelled, which got her confused looks.

Lyn sighed and ran after her. "Okay, Rea," she said with a sigh, stepping into Reneey's path. It came with a risk of getting walked over or kicked in the shins (probably both), but.. oh, well. Lyn would live with it. "Why are you getting ticked off for something he didn't even really say when you called _yourself_ emotionally damaged? And why the crap am I defending the jerk, dagnabbit!?" Lyn demanded of herself, resisting an urge to bang her head against the nearest solid object.

Lyn did indeed get kicked in the shins. "I didn't call myself emotionally damaged! I said 'I was not physicall hurt, but emotionally' -- just emotionally! _Emotionally damaged_ did not leave my mouth!" Reneey hissed. "Now, either rant with me or fuck off, your choice! Or help me find my nail file.. I need that, too, ya know..."

Lyn sighed. "Okay, I am going to quote you now. And I am not going to do your voice because I can't do an effective Russian accent, so you'll have to settle for a backwoods version of your original words. 'And my parents yelled every day and my sister joined in, and so that did some emotional damage.' Or something pretty much like that. But you _did_ say emotional damage, Rea."

"Oh, that? But that doesn't mean he needed to imply it! I don't care if _I_ say it!"

"You sound like a hypocrite, you know that, right?"

"Yes, I fucking know that!"

Lyn sighed. "Fine. You wanna go blow up at random people? Go ahead. I'll even go along. But this time, Rea, I think _you're_ the one who's looking for excuses."

Shifting her eyebrows and looking down, Lyn stepped out of the way and waited for Reneey's reaction. And also braced herself for another kick in the shins.

"Like you're one to talk!? You blow up at people who --"

Reneey stopped midsentence. _Everybody needs to get over themselves and face their fears and, when they are wrong, step up to it,_ Reneey thought. _Everybody includes me._

Her hazel eyes twitched. "Shoot me! Not in the kneecap, I sorta need that to walk.. Wait, can you walk with a kneecap that's shot?"

"I kinda doubt it, Rea," Lyn said with a faint trace of a smile.

"Would it hurt if youg ot shot in the fingers or toes?"

Lyn stared. "Are you out of your mind!? You'd be likely to shoot said digit clean off!"

Reneey burst out laughing. "Digit..."

Lyn shook her head. "I don't even want to know."

_Meanwhile..._

Yusuke Urameshi had just defeated Gouki a couple of days ago, had a run-in with Kurama, and just yesterday he had defeated Hiei. He had got all three of the missing artifacts back... regardless of the state of the mirror. Right now he was on the school rooftop with the blue-haired girl, Botan.

"Argh! I just completed a mission!"

"But you need to complete this one, too!" Botan objected. "One, you need the strength to continue being a spirit detective, two, if you don't, then no one will stop Rando and he'll use Genkai's power for world destruction!"

Yusuke groaned. "But why do _I_ have to do it!? Don't you have other ones!?"

"Because you're a spirit detective!" Botan snapped. "And there are no others!"

"Argh, fine!" Yusuke snapped as he got up.

_And meanwhile meanwhile..._

So, after many apologies, crying,a nd whatnot, there was actually peace in Kuronue's house! And right now, it was dinnertime.

"Guess what I found out today," Kuronue smirked.

"What?" Lyn asked.

"Genkai is having a tournament!" Kuronue smirked. "And whoever wins it gets to master her power!"

_And this evil but funny in this Abridged Series dude,_ Reneey thought.

"And I thought we could join it!" Kuronue said, grinning.

Lyn blinked. "Are you effing serious?"


	20. Chapter 20

**20. Steps, Chasing, and Sarcasm**

Now, after many complaints, the next day came with a deal. Reneey and Lyn would come, they just couldn't fight -- just like tag-alongs. That is, if they got white tickets.

"Holy fuck!" Reneey said. "How many effing stairs does this bitch have!?"

Kurama, who was back to his human self, answered, "Right now, we're at 350."

"Shit," Reneey groaned.

"Did you forget this part?" Lyn asked with a crooked grin at Reneey before she ran quickly up several more steps to be sure she was out of the range of any possible blows.

"NO, I DIDN'T FUCKING FORGET THIS PART! THIS IS PART OF THE REASON WHY I DIDN'T WANT TO GO HERE IN THE FUCKING FIRST PLACE!" Reneey yelled as she ran up, too. Lyn grinned and broke into a run up the stairs.

Kuronue and Kurama sweatdropped as Lyn yelled, "You know you can't catch me, Rea! I have longer legs and you're too lazy to run for long..."

Reneey growled as she ran faster, and Lyn ran even faster. Pretty soon, both girls were at the top -- but that didn't stop the chase.

"Excuse me -- pardon me," Lyn muttered to random people as she ran from Reneey.

"MOVE YOUR FUCKING ASS! LYNNI! YOU BETTER RUN OR ELSE I'LL BREAK OFF YOUR WINGS!" Reneey yelled as she ran after Lyn.

"Um, you girls can stop running now," Kurama said with a triple sweatdrop as he and Kuronue also made it to the top.

"What's the fun in that?" Lyn asked, still flashing the crooked grin as she actually jumped over some random short kid and continued dodging through the ranks of people.

Reneey pushed random people out of the way as she ran to catch up with Lyn.

"What is the motive behind this chase?" Kuronue asked.

Both girls stopped, looked at each other, then at Kuronue, shrugged, and continued running.

"To break the monotony, of course!" Lyn yelled over her shoulder at Kuronue.

Suddenly Lyn bumped into a guy wearing blue, and Reneey bumped into Lyn and made the guy in blue fall down, which made another guy laugh.

"The great Kuwabara who can defeat anyone.. gets knocked down by two girls!"

"Shut it, Urameshi," Kuwabura said in a muffled tone.

Lyn promptly got up and whacked Yusuke upside the head. "That's for being a retarded, formerly dead pervert."

And so she made a face at him and then randomly walked away.

It was Kuwabara's turn to laugh as Yusuke just blinked and the two girls walked away, grinning.

"Um.. okay?"

Suddenly the door opened and out came Master Genkai, and next to her was a pot. Genkai cleared her throat and proceeded to tell everybody to get in line for an envelope, and when they opened it, if it was red, they stayed; but if it was white, get out and stop wasting her time. So everybody got into line and, after a while, everybody had a little envelope.

And, RIP!

"Holy shit! How the hell did I get a red!? I don't have spiritual power!" Reneey groaned as she held up a red paper, and Lyn also made a face as she produced another red paper.

"How did I know this was gonna happen?"

Yusuke, Kuwabara, Kuronue, Kurama, Reneey, Lyn, and several other random dudes whose names aren't important (though one of them was Rando!) remained in the room while everyone else filed out.

"Hurry up, now! I dont have all day, you know," Genkai said as she stepped inside her place with the people behind her.

(Because this fic is a fic, we are skipping the game part. All you have to know is what you saw in the episode; just add two girls and pretend Kurama n Kuroune were there.)

"Well, this should be fun," Lyn said, smirking, as she, Reneey, Kurama, and Kuronue lined up with the original twenty competitors for the jungle thingamabob.

"Why?" Kuronue asked with raised eyebrows.

"Oh.. no reason," Lyn said, smirking.

Reneey groaned. "But I don't wanna run..." She hit her head against Lyn's shoulder and complained, "I blame you for listening to me when I told you to pick up the phone."

"Well, I blame you for picking Yu Yu Hakusho," Lyn said with a sigh, patting Reneey's shoulder. "You know.. I wonder if any of the random dudes who never come out of this place end up getting eaten...?"

"Who knows. Let's just hope they do." Then her face brightened. "Lynni, when we start running -- well, they start running, I'm so walking -- we need to play Welcome to the Jungle on our cells."

"Why?"

"'Cause in the Abridged Series it happens!"

Lyn rolled her eyes. "Actually, that's a good plan!" she said, widening her eyes at Reneey. "We walk really, really, really slow and maybe we won't get there in time and we can just go home!"

"And all along listen to -- AHH!" The race had started, and Kurama and Kuronue had started dragging them into the jungle. "Get the fuck off!"

"Okay," Lyn growled, "this is so not gonna work when we run into the snakes and wolves and crap. LET GO OF ME DADBURN IT!" she suddenly thundered, hitting Kuronue hard in the shoulder in an attempt to make him loose his hold on her upper arm.

"We are so not letting you out of our sight!" Kuronue said.

"Daddy!" Reneey growled as she tried scratching, biting, kicking, and clawing to geta way, but so far nothing was working.

"No," Kurama said firmly.

"Okay, seriously!" Lyn grumbled. "You do realize that the next part is one-on-one matches, right? What are you gonna do then, morons?"

"WHAT!?" Kurama demanded. "There's no way you girls can go through that!"

"SO WHY ARE WE HERE!?" Reneey snapped.

"Because they're paranoid we'll run away again," Lyn answered simply. "Oh, and of course they assume we're defenseless, too... Never mind the fact that we made it fine for years before they showed up..."

Suddenly the ground started shaking, a big crack appeared, and seconds later hundreds of trees appeared between Reneey and Lyn and Kuronue and Kurama.

"Now we can walk really slow!" Lyn celebrated.

"And listen to Welcome to the Jungle!"

"And chop the heads off snakes! ... Hey, look, snakes! Oooh, big snake. Reminds me of this one I knocked off the bird feeder once..."

"SNAKES!?" Kuronue yelled. "LYN, RENEEY, YOU STAY RIGHT THERE WHERE YOU ARE AND WE'LL BE THERE SHORTLY!"

Reneey and Lyn turned on Welcome to the Jungle and began walking away.

"Yeah, we're staying right in the same exact place!" Lyn yelled in a voice dripping with sarcasm.

Apparently Kurama didn't catch said sarcasm, because he yelled, "Good!"

Lyn rolled her eyes at Reneey and muttered in a low voice, "Gullible idgets..."

But what the girls didn't know was that they were heading straight for where Genkai was, and after thirty minutes, they appeared there alongside Kuwabara and the other dudes who don't need names.

"What!? No way!" Reneey shrieked, and Lyn groaned.

Genkai smirked.

"_How_ did this happen?" Lyn grumbled, leaning back against a wall with a groan.

"It's Genkai," Reneey sighed. "I don't like her any more..."

"You kidding? She's awesome. Insanely strict, but still awesome. I just don't wanna effing do this, dadburn it..."

"WHERE WERE YOU TWO!?" Kuronue demanded as he and Kurama emerged from the jungle.

"We specifically told you not to go anywhere!" Kurama added.

Lyn rolled her eyes and hit her head once against the wall before just leaning back against it again. "Yeah, we really need to teach y'all about this amazing thing called sarcasm. And you definitely need to learn that we're not helpless, we've been trying to get you to understand that since we came here..."

Genkai suddenly started clapping, thus making everyone shut up and look at her.

"Time is up. Anyone who's not here -- too bad."

"Wait!" Kuwabara shouted. "There should be one more person here!"

"Hey! Sorry if I'm late!" Yusuke shouted as he came running up.

"URAMESHI, YOU'RE LATE!" Kuwabara yelled.

"Oh, damn. When it says never go in a straight line, it means it!"

Genkai's eyes widened. "You went in a straight line!? Does that mean you fought him!?"

"How ironic is it that Yusuke fought a bat demon?" Lyn whispered to Reneey, who nodded.

"I've never seen anyone alive after that battle! Fine, just once, I'm making an exception," Genkai mused. Then she turned to Lyn and Reneey and snapped, "And you two, turn that revolting music off!"

"Hey! It's not revolting!" Reneey pouted.

Lyn's eye twitched. "Did she.. just.. insult.. Guns n Roses!? ... A lynchmob is gathering in the Tennessee hills right now..."

"Who and what is Guns and Roses?" Genkai asked, blinking.

Reneey gasped. "Guns n Roses is the bang who brought back metal rock just when it was dorn to the ground! Axel Rose, hotti, and their song Welcome to the Jungle totally goes well in the jungle scene!"

"And there's no and," Lyn said, shaking her head. "It's Guns n Roses, not Guns and Roses. That's like calling Pink Floyd, Pink Lloyd!"

"What's the difference?" Genkai blinked.

"The difference is that you'll be insulting Guns n Roses if you say Guns and Roses!" Reneey shrieked.

"And I care why...?"

"'CAUSE IT'S GUNS N ROSES!" Lyn and Reneey exclaimed together.

"And because just about every Southern rock junkie in the history of mankind will be out for your blood otherwise," Lyn added as an afterthought.

Genkai blinked again; she seemed to be doing a lot of that. "Riiight. Just turn it off!"

"See?" Lyn asked as she switched off her cell phone's music played and raised an eyebrow at Kuronue and Kurama. "Even Genkai gets sarcasm! Just listen to the tone of her voice!"

Reneey's was still on. "Reneey," Lyn said.

"But I wanna --"

"RENEEY UMBRA!"

"Fine!"

Reneey took out her headphones and conneted them to her cell, then just listened via headphones. Lyn just rolled her eyes and sighed.


	21. Chapter 21

**21. Random**

Genkai led the twelve remaining people to another building, with doors bigger than a New York City building. Once she opened them, the room was split into two parts -- the light side, and the pitch black side.

"You will be fighting in the dark. This is a perfect training exercise to increase your senses other than vision." Genkai cleared her throat. "The matches shall be as follows: first, Reneey versus Kuroda; second, Musashi versus Shorin; third, Kazemaru versus Lyn; fourth, Kuwabara versus Chinpo; fifth, Kuronue versus Kurama; and sixth, Yusuke versus Kibano. The person who lives and returns here is the winner. If both opponents are knocked out, both are disqualified."

"Wow," Lyn said, blinking. "I guess you're up first, Rea."

"What!? She can't fight yet!" Kurama objected worriedly as Reneey skipped to the dark side and her opponent walked there.

Lyn rolled her eyes and said, "Just watch, idget."

"Ready, and begin!" Genkai yelled, and Lyn grinned.

"Reneey! There's eyeliner to the left of you!" she shouted.

"There is!?" Reneey moved to the left side, and as she did so, her foot went up, and hit her opponent. "Lynni! I don't feel any eyeliner here!"

"Oh, whoops; something must be wrong with my vision! I mean the right side!"

Reneey moved to the right side, and at the same time her hand went up and she punched her opponent as he again tried to attack. "Goddamn it, Lyn! It's not here!"

"I mean on the wall to your left!"

"Mkay..."

Her opponent was running quite fast at her this time, and when she moved, he lost his balance and fell onto the light side of the ground, knocked out, while Reneey was still looking for eyeliner on the wall.

"The winner is Reneey Umbra!" Genkai yelled.

"Huh?" Reneey asked, blinking. "What happened?"

"How did you do that?" Kuwabara asked Lyn with wide eyes.

"Er.. good vision?"

Truthfully, since Lyn was a bat demon, she naturally did well in the dark; but she wasn't going to say that to Kuwabara.

Kuronue and Kurama stared at her, and Lyn flashed that crooked grin again. "What? You just have know how to motivate her properly."

"That.. has to be the shortest fight I've ever seen," Kuronue said, blinking.

"Lynni! There's no fucking eyeliner here!" Reneey pouted.

"No worries," Lyn said, smiling. "I'll buy you some later. And a nail file and a bobby pin."

"Yay!" Reneey said, grinning, as she skipped to the light side again. "So, like.. where'd my opponent go?"

Everybody but Lyn did a face fall.

"Just start the next match," Genkai sighed.

"What about him?" Kuwabara asked, pointing to Reneey's opponent.

Genkai shrugged. "With any luck, he'll rot."

Lyn suddenly elbowed Kuwabara and gave him a sideways look. "Ten bucks on Shorin."

"No way! I don't gamble with girls!"

"Fine, be a sexist jerk," Lyn grumbled, this time whacking _him_ upside the head before crossing her arms and settling back into her usual place leaning against the wall.

"Hey, I'm not sexist! It's just that girls should be treated with honor and dignity!" Kuwabara hmphed.

Lyn just scoffed. "Consider yourself lucky you're not fighting me or Reneey, then. I never did prescribe to that doctrine that girls are supposed to be sweet and gentle and scream like a banshee when confronted with anything more dangerous than a cooking utensil."

So, after ten minutes, Shorin came out without Musashi.

"Hey! How did you know that!?" Kuwabara asked Lyn suspiciously. _I'm getting a weird vibe from her..._

Lyn's lip curled and she quirked an eyebrow at him. "I'm a good guesser, too?"

Really, she didn't expect him to believe her, but she didn't care. She was supposed to fight next, and she didn't really want to.

"Next match," Genkai ordered.

"Ugh, I should take this out on _you two_ for making me come here," Lyn growled at Kuronue and Kurama. "I don't wanna fight some random dude! Why should I beat the crap out of him if he never did anything to me!?"

"Ha!" Kazemaru laughed. "Well, this should be easy -- fighting a _girl_. You'd better run home now, doll. Don't wanna break a nail, do you?"

Lyn stiffened and, for a second, she didn't move. Then her expression turned livid as she snarled, "Ohhhh, uh-uh. You did _not_ just say that."

Cracking her knuckles and her neck at the same time, Lyn let out a low growl and tossed her cell phone, allergy alert bracelet, and the silver chain with three metal tags, which she usually wore around her neck, to Kuronue.

"That's it, jerkoff," she hissed, advancing on Kazemaru with fire in her green eyes. Reneey sniggered at the insult, but she was ignored as Lyn went on, "You don't play that card and walk -- or expect me to, either."

"YO, RENEEY!" Lyn yelled, pointing at Reneey without turning around or removing her death glare from Kazemaru. "You are now my DJ. Give us some music to dance to, and I don't mean a waltz." A short pause, then she smirked and added, "Maybe start it out on Panic just for the sheer irony of it, eh?"

"Mkay, but first I wanna play Paradise City 'cuz of the awesome guitar solo," Reneey said, grinning, as she disconnected the headphones and Paradise City by Guns n Roses blared. "Tell me when ya ready!"

"Oh, I've been ready since the moron here opened his mouth."

"Be careful," Kuronue said tensely.

Lyn laughed. "You say that like you honestly believe I've never beat some sense into somebody. There's a reason most people at my high school were afraid of me."

She smirked as she stepped into the darkness. "Ready to eat your words, jerk-face? And maybe a few teeth, while you're at it?"

"Ha! Like you can actually defeat me! Don't make me laugh, girl."

"Fine; I'll make you bleed."

So after thirty minutes and many kicks, punches, and screams, and much growling and howling, Lyn walked out following a particularly loud thud, wiping blood from her knuckles with a rather vicious sort of smirk on her face.

"Anybody else have any comments about girls being weak and useless!?" she demanded of the room at large, her glare lingering on Kuwabara and Yusuke longer than anyone else.

_Stupid sexist idiot and his friend/rival/whatever-the-crap-they-really-are, the perv..._

"Fourth match, go!" Genkai exclaimed.

Kuwabara nodded and glanced at his opponent, Chinpo, before heading toward the dark side of the room.

"You can give me my stuff back any time now," Lyn said, rather impatiently, to Kuronue, as she dabbed a cut on her eyebrow with the back of her hand.

"Hey, Lyn, what's up with these tags?" Kuronue asked as he held them up to the light.

"They were my cat, Gobble's," Lyn said slowly, stiffening slightly again at the continued questioning about things related to her past. "This stupid woman who lived down the street randomly decided to walk five dogs without a leash one day... Well, suffice it to say that Gobble doesn't need them any more, so I wear them for her. Now give them back before I take them, and likely your hand in the process."

Kuronue raised his eyebrows, but gave the tags back to Lyn without another word.

"So who's next?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Lyn stared at Reneey. "Um, hello? Sexist moron and Chinpo? Who just walked over there to fight ten seconds ago?"

"Who's sexist here?" Kurama asked.

"The ugly idget over there," Lyn answered, gesturing in the general direction of the dark side of the room. "Oh, and also the dude whose face I bashed in... Heh... Maybe he'll keep his retarded comments to himself from now on..."

"Kuwabara? He ain't sexist! In fact, he thinks that just because we're girls, we should be treated like delicate little flowers," Reneey said in disgust. "And Yusuke is funny, especially in the abridged series..."

"That's exactly what makes him sexist, idget," Lyn said, rolling her eyes. "I don't need some moron pussyfooting around because he thinks I'll faint if he looks at me too hard. And who the crap said anything about the retarded perv?"

Reneey burst out laughing. "Pussy..."

"Jeez, you're as big a perv as the retarded, formerly-dead one..."

"Would you two quit your bickering!?" Genkai snapped at the girls.

"Reneey can't do that," Lyn said, smirking. "She'd explode if she had to be quiet."

"Shut up!" Reneey hmphed. "Not talking to you for ten seconds!"

"If you don't shut up, I'll make sure you won't be talking," Genkai said dryly.

"Somehow Genkai's much funnier in the abridged series, too," Lyn murmured thoughtfully. "No less awesomely sarcastic and threatening, though..."

"She says 'go fuck yourselves' in the abridged movie," Reneey laughed. "I can't wait to see Yusuke's and Rando's fight. Remember the abridged series? 'What are you gonna do to Rando? Gonna go up in Rando's face? Gonna throw some punches at Rando? Man, get ya bitch ass away from Rando!'"

Both girls stared laughing, and everybody looked at them.

"What?" Lyn managed to choke out.

"And let the next match begin!" Genkai announced.

"Wait, what the hell?" Reneey asked, blinking.

"You girls missed the match!" Kuronue said. "And who's Rando?"

"This dude whose face is cute but the rest is all ugly... Especially that purple splat thing on his chest... Wonder if he was playing paintball before the tournament?" Reneey wondered.

Kuronue blinked at Reneey and then turned to Lyn for an explanation... but she was busy gaping at Reneey.

"YOU KNOW WHAT PAINTBALL IS!? OHMYGOSH, I'M SO PROUD!"

Then she randomly tackle hugged Reneey, Kurama and Kuronue blinked, and Genkai growled, "I said, next match!"

"OF COURSE I KNOW WHAT PAINTBALL IS!" Reneey souted, just because Lyn had shouted. "IT'S ONE OF THE THINGS MY MOM DOESN'T LET ME DO!"

"YOUARESODEPRIVED!"

"Who's the next match?" Kuronue asked, sweatdropping, as he backed as far as possible away from the girls to mke sure that his ears weren't damaged.

"YOU ARE, YOU USELESS LOUSE!" Genkai thundered. "YOU AND THAT BRAINLESS TOMATO-HAIRED CREATURE NEXT TO YOU!"

"Ooh, this should be fun," Lyn said, suddenly grinning broadly. "Anybody got any popcorn?"

Several people sweatdropped and Reneey pouted, growling, "I am not fucking deprived, godddamn it!" before hmphing and turning away.

"I AM NOT -- Ow, ow, ow, ow -- Kurama!"

Kuronue stopped in mid sentence as Kurama grabbed him by the ear and began to drag him to the dark side of the room.

"Come on, Kuronue," Kurama sighed exasperatedly.

"Not talking to you till we reach Kuwabara n Rando's fight!" Reneey told Lyn.

"Yeah, then we must laugh because of abridged series memories that no one else gets..."

It was a good thing Yusuke and Botan and Kuwabara were currently outside. No idea why, they just were there where Botan had appeared. Maybe they just liked being outside.

After many minutes of fighting and noise, everything became dead silent.

"Dudet, did Daddy n Uncle die?" Reneey asked, blinking.

"Now, that would be an irony," Lyn murmured thoughtfully.

"How would it be irony?"

"Never mind," Lyn murmured with a sigh, leaning back against the wall and crossing her arms.

"It's a tie!" Genkai declared. "No one wins!"

"How does she know this?" Reneey asked.

Lyn shrugged. "Maybe she has awesome dreams that come true, too. Maybe she stole ugly sexist dude's sensey-spirit-thingy. Maybe she sold her soul to the devil so that she can know the future. Or maybe she's just awesome like that."

"I never did know why Kuwabara is like the only human spirit detective," Reneey mumbled. "So who's next?"

"Idget perv and dude-who-can-see-in-the-dark..."

"Oh, the dude with the helmet thingy... mudgy.. red eye.. machine.. thing..."

Everybody blinked at Reneey and took a couple of steps away from the two girls.

"Wow, we are so messing up the episodes," Lyn mumbled.

"I feel an urge to scream random..."

Lyn burst out laughing.

"What?" Reneey asked, blinking.

"You do know what you just said?"

Reneey blinked.

Lyn rolled her eyes and prompted, "Random..."

Then Reneey started laughing. "Random, that's funny, we need to scream that."

"One," Lyn started.

"Two," Reneey said.

"RANDOM!" they yelled together.


	22. Chapter 22

**22. Disqualificiation?**

"Damn, we've passed like five or something episodes that quick," Reneey mumbled.

"This is what happens when fangirls are in an anime show..."

"What are you girls bickering about?" Genkai asked with raised eyebrows.

"'Bickering' would imply a disagreement," Lyn said, shrugging. "Currently, we're getting along quite well."

Genkai rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Just stop talking and your nonsense screaming." Then she turned away, muttering, "Dimwits..."

"Ah, but would a dimwit be able to correct your grammar?" Lyn asked with a faint smile. "And if so, would that not make you worse than a dimwit? Only one of the two hypotheses can be true: either I am a dimwit and you are worse, or I am not and therefore you are not."

Lyn's eyes twinkled. It was always fun to mess with people's heads, especially when they were awesomely sarcastic and threatening and could mess with your head right back.

Genkai just sighed. _Great, now I have three dimwits with me._

"I have a feeling she just called us dimwits," Reneey mumbled.

"Well, then hopefully she's realized that makes her one, too," Lyn said, shrugging. "Too bad, I was hoping for a combatative, sarcastic remark..."

So after a long twenty minutes, Yusuke came back, grinning. Botan and Kuwabara cheered.

"Whoo... Now can we get on with it?" Reneey shouted. She was getting annoyed, and what was more annoying was that she couldn't watch Rurouni Kenshin and some asshole -- oh, I mean, _fox spirit_ -- had taken away her cells.

"So who's next?" Botan asked with such a cheery smile that Lyn and Reneey had to be restrained by the newly awoken Kurama.

"I think Tea took happy friendship lessons from Botan," Lyn said, twitching.

"Must... not... rip... out... hair... Must... resist... urges... Okay, seriously, get the fucking hell off!" Reneey snapped.

"Duh, fangirlism," Lyn said with a grin before randomly twisting away. "Ain't it awesome to be awesome?"

Reneey just ducked and got away from Kurama. "Next time I'll take ya damn arm with me," she grumbled.

_Yes, she definitely has Ruby's temper,_ Youko thought.

"So who goes next?" Botan asked once again.

"Lyn versus Reneey," Genkai announced. "Stop bickering and proceed to the fight, please."

Lyn gave Reneey a sideways look. "You thinking we _both_ throw, cut our losses, and get out now?"

"Yeah, sure," yawned Reneey. "Why not?"

"I don't look forward to looking like an idiot, but oh, well," Lyn said with a sigh. "Better than having to lose on purpose to the idget perv or Random -- er, I mean, Rando."

"Ya know Yusuke is actually awesome n ain't sexist?" Reneey asked with raised eyebrows.

"Didn't say he was sexist, said he was a perv," Lyn corrected her. "Huge difference. And he's still an idget. I mean, jeez, who takes five minutes to figure out they're dead after getting hit by a car?"

"Well, if Yusuke wasn't an idiot, then he wouldn't be funny! And not to mention a smartass! Smartasses are funny!"

"Idgetness is not funny. Well, except in Jay's case, but he just has a talent with that, being funny by way of making an idiot out of himself..."

"You only read the episodes and saw like ten minutes of the first two episodes! You don't know, damn it!"

"WOULD YOU TWO QUIT TALKING AND MOVE YOUR ASSES!?" Genkai snapped at the girls.

"We are moving, by definition that's what walking is!" Lyn shot back.

"WELL, YOU'RE MOVING SLOWER THAN A SNAIL, DIMWITS!"

"You should know!"

Genkai scoffed. "Really? You think that you could go faster than me? Your spirit energy level isn't even half of some of these people here, and if you can't beat them, what makes you think you can take me on? Or if there is someone else, who is much stronger and has a higher spirit energy than you, but yet I can defeat them and you can't? Do you really think that you're faster than me? Who's the snail now?"

"Oh, yeah, the favored excuse of everyone these days -- something to do with the infamous 'spirit energy.' Riddle me this, then, if you know all: who would win a fight, a strong man who had never fought a day in his life or a weaker man with actual experience? For some of us, it has literally been a battle to stay alive since the day we were born. That's why little twerps who've been pampered their entire lives can't last in a street fight. See, you can prattle on about your beloved 'spirit energy' all day, but in the end, that's what it comes down to. You either learn how to take care of yourself and you live, or you don't and you die. It's that freaking simple."

Kurama was tense with worry, but Kuronue was just grim. Lyn and Reneey wouldn't really hurt each other, he knew that. But Lyn's little rant had served to remind him how little he still knew about her, and made him think about just what she might have had to fight through.

"Wait, wha?" Reneey asked, blinking. "Was that an insult or a compliment?"

Lyn sighed. "Never mind. Let's just freaking get this over with, all right?"

"But I wanna know!"

"You know, Rea, the sooner we get this over with, the sooner the last battle comes and we get to make random Abridged comments and attempt to make characters say Abridged lines!"

"But I wanna know, goddamn it!"

Lyn sweatdropped. "How am I supposed to explain if you can't understand what I'm saying?"

"Well, then make me understand?"

"Reneey, just let it go and I'll attempt to explain later. If I survive through the stupid clicheness of who wins this tournament and how."

"But I don't let things go, you know that! So tell me!" Reneey went into brat mode, like any other thirteen-year-old girl when she didn't get what she wanted.

"I CAN'T EVEN FREAKING REMEMBER WHAT I SAID ANY MORE!"

"BUT YOU HAVE A BETTER MEMORY THAN MINE!"

"THAT'S IT!" Genkai thundered. "IT'S A FORFEITURE! BOTH OF YOU LOSE! ON TO THE NEXT MATCH!"

Lyn blinked. "Wow. That was simple. We should've randomly yelled instead of fighting and got out of this tournament ages ago."

"BUT I WANNA KNOW GODDAMN IT!" Reneey pouted as she crossed her arms across her chest.

"Just start the next fight," Genkai said, sweatdropping.

"Hey, what's today?" Kuwabara asked suddenly.

"May tenth, why?" Botan answered.

"No reason," Kuwabara replied, shrugging, but Reneey heard what Botan had said.

"MY BIRTHDAY IS IN THREE DAYS! NOOOO, I DON'T WANNA TURN FOURTEEN!"

Reneey sobbed, and Lyn just shrugged. "So? Three days after that means I'm halfway to seventeen. It's not like they really mean anything, other than the fact that you survived another year."

Kuronue frowned again. Lyn was always so serious, so grim. It pained him to think how much she must have hurt to become so calloused and even cold.

"Yes, but you see, I was born on Friday the thirteenth, and I'm thirteen, so it's like thirteen and thirteen! It wouldn't make sense if it were thirteen and fourteen!"

"Riiight, because that makes sense," Kurama sweatdropped.

"Sure, it makes sense," Lyn said patiently. "It's in order. Thirteen, fourteen. See?"

"I don't wanna turn fourteen!" Reneey snapped as she pouted again.

"Too bad," Lyn said, shrugging again and rolling her eyes. "Nothing you can do about it."

"The match is over!" Genkai yelled.

"Huh?" Reneey asked, blinking.


	23. Chapter 23

A/N: Hello, peoples! So I have this idea for a little contest for all of you readers. So the contest is this: Who can draw the best scene from any of mine and Lyn's fanfics? In case you don't know them all, here they are:

We're Not In A Fanfic (Yu-Gi-Oh!)  
TV's Are Starting to Revolt (Yu Yu Hakusho)  
Eating Food From Bleach (Bleach, obviously)  
The Dark Shards (Inuyasha)  
Is Blood Thicker Than Water? (Vampire Knight)  
Shinigami, Fangirls, Detectives, Killers, Oh My! (Death Note)  
Wristbands (Naruto)  
Hellions Break Loose (Supernatural)  
and A World Apart (Final Fantasy 7) -- on Lyn's fanfiction account, if you haven't read it

What I mean by scenes is that you can draw Lyn getting mad at Reneey for cursing out Seto in We're Not in a Fanfic!, Hiei kidnapping Reneey and Lyn from TVs Are Starting to Revolt, or any other scene from any of our fanfics listed above.

Here's how you must enter: You send me a PM or an email (you can find it on my profile) with the LINK of your picture. It can be photobucket, deviantArt, whatever. AS LONG AS IT'S A LINK AND NOT A FILE!

Use this form:

Username:  
What story did you pick?:  
What characters are in it?:  
What's happening in the picture?:

The deadline is May 30th; the winner will be announced on June 10th.

AND THE PRIZE! (Insert flashing lights and all that pretty shiny stuff here)  
The winner will get a sneak peek into our upcoming Elfen Lied, Code Geass, Full Metal Alchemist, and Avatar: The Last Airbender fanfics as well as a special treat from each of us. I will do a dedicated AMV, and Lyn is too indecisive to decide on one thing so she's said she'll do a sketch, edit it with Paint Shop Pro if you want, random abstract on PSP, do a new humor avatar, make an AMV, write a oneshot -- basically it's your call. Yes that's right, folks! Six prizes for one little fanart! Think you're up to it!?

Second place will get to pick a prize from either me or Lyn and choose two of those four sneak peeks, so basically you get half the first place prize. And for third there will be an award of one sneak peek. And if you respond to our sneak peeks with comments, you'll get mentioned and/or quoted in the author's note of the first chapter of that fic when it's posted!!!

Oh and you might want to check out our deviantArt to see our stuff before you decide what you want for a prize -- Lyn's is LadyOfRandomness(dot)deviantart(dot)com and mine's ReneeyUmbra(dot)deviantart(dot)com so check us out!

---

**23. Happy Ending**

Lyn stared as Yusuke started punching Rando, who was now in full-on Rando demon form. "Uh... how did we miss the whole Kuwabara fight with him screaming and crap? And why does Yusuke think he can kill a demon that powerful by hitting him a few times?"

"Didn't he beat your cohorts by punching them?" Kuronue asked Kurama.

Kurama shook his head. "He couldn't even beat Gouki without his spirit gun, much less Hiei. As for Rando..."

"Oh crap!" Yusuke yelled as his attacks failed.

"Yeah, basically that," Lyn said, nodding.

"Yay he's going all glowy!" Reneey squealed. "You know, he would be hot if he didn't have like... the veiny-looking makeup-type stuff..."

Lyn raised an eyebrow. "... Actually, he kind of looks like Kurama wearing makeup."

Kurama twitched. "What?"

Reneey gasped. "ARE YOU RELATED TO RANDO!?"

Lyn smirked. "Shouldn't they be about the same age...?"

Kurama glared. "I am not related to Rando!"

"Aww," Reneey pouted, then brightened. "But if I'm not related to him, that means I can think he's hot!"

"Good luck with that when he goes mini jailbird," Lyn muttered, then raised an eyebrow. "Okay, seriously, he looks like some kind of bizarre caterpillar making a cocoon. What the freaking heck?"

"It's --"

"I know what it is," Lyn said exasperatedly. "I just want to know how the heck he doesn't realize what a moron he looks like. If he steals Youko's trick and uses leaves for butterfly wings, I am so out of here."

Reneey snickered and the others looked confused... probably because that was about 80 episodes away.

"Yusuke keeps getting tied up with random energy-related things," Lyn said with a sweatdrop. "I mean, Hiei's glowy... red... energy... bond... whatever the heck they're called and now this. Seriously, he should invest in spirit scissors or something."

"Who cares? This is the awesome part!" Reneey said with a grin. "On three?"

Lyn chuckled. "On three."

"One..."

Kuronue and Kurama exchanged looks and backed away.

"Two..."

Genkai frowned at them but ignored it.

"THREE!"

Botan leapt out of the way like something was about to explode, pulling the old master with her.

And then Lyn and Reneey started singing at the top of their lungs:

"YOU SPIN ME RIGHT ROUND BABY RIGHT ROUND"

Kuronue and Kurama did sweatdrops. Botan blinked and helped the glaring Genkai to her feet, apologizing profusely. And Yusuke went crashing through trees!

"LIKE A ROCKET BABY RIGHT ROUND"

"SHUT UP BEFORE I THROW YOU OFF MY PROPERTY!" Genkai thundered.

Meanwhile Lyn had gotten bored with singing anyway and was frowning at Rando. "Dude does Random not realize that he sounds like a four-year-old constantly going 'this or this or this or this or this'?"

"Maybe he just likes to look and/or sound weird," Reneey said, shrugging and stopping singing too just because... but not because she had even heard Genkai, because frankly she was barely aware the old woman had spoken.

"Yusuke's gonna get a headrush if he keeps hanging upside-down like that," Lyn commented.

"I don't think he's gonna be thinking about headrushes here in a sec," Reneey muttered.

"Hey! What's cooking!?"

"You, moron," Lyn said with a roll of her eyes as a giant fish came up and turned just short of biting Yusuke's head off.

"What the hell are those!?"

"I've summoned them from the depths of spirit world. They're called hate fish."

Lyn shot a sideways look at Genkai. "Say, Genkai! How do you feel about hate fish?"

Genkai stared at her. "What?"

"Hate fish! What do you think about them?"

Genkai stared, then apparently decided to ignore her.

"Come on!" Lyn pressed. "You must have some opinion of hate fish, right?"

"They're mindless, barbaric devices of destruction, if that's what you mean."

"No, I mean personally! Like do you like them, do you not like them...?"

"Why would I like them?"

"So you hate them!"

"... I suppose..."

"... Could you say that?"

Genkai stared. "What is wrong with you?"

"Come on, just say it! 'I hate hate fish!'"

"Why?"

"Because!"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Why should I!?"

"Because I'll send Reneey after you with eyeliner if you don't!"

Genkai blinked. Then she looked at Reneey, who innocently held Larry the eyeliner pen.

"... I hate hate fish."

"YES!" Lyn cried, punching the air. "VICTORY! Pay up, Reneey!"

Reneey pouted and handed over five dollars. "Not fair! You paid her off somehow!"

"You're just a sore loser."

"Well at least I'm not --"

"Oh no! He's going to do what he did to Kuwabara!" Botan cried. "I can't watch it again!"

"Huh?" Lyn asked, blinking. "Whoa! We missed the whole big light show! Why did nobody tell me when they were doing the big light show!?"

She pouted, and Kuronue blinked. "How did you miss two dueling spirit guns?"

"I was trying to make Genkai say she hates hate fish!"

"... Why...?"

"Oh just shut up and let's watch Rando become fun-sized."

Reneey snorted. "Fun size!"

Lyn whacked her upside the head.

But Kuroune blinked. "Fun... sized...?"

"You know, I never understood why they call the little candy bars fun size," Lyn said with the air of someone pondering one of life's great mysteries. "I mean, what's fun about not as much candy?"

And so Rando shrank and Genkai explained why and everything was okay again. Well, except from Yusuke's point of view, where he not only didn't get to use the tickets Botan had promised him but also had to go train wih Genkai for six months. And of course for Genkai, who had to put up with him for that long. And for Lyn who still didn't get to go home. And for Reneey who had already missed Ruroni Kenshin.

... Wait, is there a happy ending in this for anybody?

Oh right. Kuwabara. He got healed. Which means everybody else has to put up with him.

... So yeah, no happy endings.


	24. Chapter 24

A/N:

---

**26. **

"So where are we heading to?" Lyn asked as they walked.

"Spirit world portal, just ahead," Hiei said in a clipped tone. "The fugitive is hiding out in America."

Lyn stopped dead in her tracks. "... Where in America?"

"Athens, Tennessee," Youko answered this time.

"... This is the real reason you didn't want me to go, isn't it?"

Kuronue sighed. "We didn't want it to bring back any memories for you."

Lyn shook herself and kept walking but all traces of joking were gone now. "Well, don't worry about it. I get plenty of memories either way and I'm not the type to back down. Anyway, it's not like I'm likely to run into anyone I know."

Reneey smiled sadly. She knew the type of memories that would come back to Lyn but they weren't all the type that Kuronue or Youko knew about.

Kuronue sighed. "Are you sure you don't want to stay back with Reneey?"

"You know, I really hate having to repeat myself," Lyn said firmly, crossing her arms and setting her jaw.

Kuronue sighed. "Alright, fine..." And with that, he turned and kept on walking.

"So... what do we do?" Reneey asked, blinking.

Lyn shrugged. "Get to the portal. Go to Tennessee. Find whomever we're looking for. Come back. End of story."

Reneey frowned. "Alright..."

"... It's not that easy, onna," Hiei said.

"And what's the complication?" Lyn asked with an arched brow.

"Well, we have to find him... fight him... kill him... hide him... Hn... You are right... It is easy."

"Precisely," Lyn agreed, nodding. "Now let's get going and get this over with."

Hiei merely made a "hn" sound at her sudden change of attitude.

"So where's the portal?" Reneey asked.

"We'll get to it soon, onna -- now quit whining," Hiei ordered.

Lyn promptly whacked him upside the head. "You're no one's boss, thanks. And if she stopped whining, she'd explode. Right, Rea?"

Reneey giggled and nodded. Hiei growled and punched Lyn in the face. Unlike Kuwabara, he would fight anyone, regardless of gender. Lyn merely smirked.

"So sorry -- was that supposed to sting?"

Hiei growled and sent a kick to Lyn's ribs; she caught it and her thumb landed on a pressure point near his knee with enough force to send pain lancing up that entire side of his body. Her eyes were narrowed in anger but not fierce enough yet to show that she intended to do any permanent damage.

"If you think I'm just some stupid little girl who wants to tag along and be dead weight, you're wrong and I'd suggest you revise your opinion." She released her grip and shoved him back but kept her eyes on him in case he didn't take the hint and tried to attack again. "Now how about you stop acting like a petulant child and we do the job we were sent to do, huh?"

Hiei growled and was in shock but at the same time, impressed against his will that this woman had stopped his attacks. Perhaps it had been only a fluke that he had caught her and the other girl off guard before... With a "hn," he walked away.

All the while, Youko was holding back Kuronue.

"If he was after Reneey, would you be wanting me to hold you back?!" Kuronue snarled.

"That's different... Lyn can protect herself."

"Right, anyway," Lyn said briskly as if nothing had happened, brushing her hair back out of her face. "Portal and runaway demon and everything." She sighed and shook her head. "Dang, I should've had more coffee this morning..."

After some walking, the gang reached the portal Koenma had set up to America. "So... we should split up," Youko said. "Lyn, you go with Hiei; Reneey, you're with me and Kuronue."

"But D--"

"Youko, are you insane?!" Kuronue demanded. "You want to let my little girl go with -- with _him_?! Alone?!"

"I'm not a little girl!" Lyn snapped.

Youko rolled his eyes. "I think she's proven she can handle him."

"But why can't I go with Lynni?" Reneey pouted.

"Because Lyn can take care of herself with Hiei... and well... You need a whole army to take care of you," Youko said simply.

"Let's not forget that I would be likely to murder you for whining," Hiei added with a glare. "Now are we going or aren't we?"

Youko shot Hiei a glare as he took Reneey's arm and pulled her to Kuronue and then through the portal.

"Hn... so since you know most of the place..."

"I do know the city, but not where demons hide in it," Lyn felt the need to add.

"Well, can you sense demon energy?"

"Yeah, but there's bound to be more than one demon in the city, isn't there?"

"Of course. This will take some time..." Hiei sighed. "Well, at least your voice doesn't make my ears bleed..."

"Thanks oh so much for your vote of confidence."

"I don't know how you can stand her."

Ordinarily, Lyn would have been full of biting retorts for remarks like that, but the current surroundings had a subduing effect. She didn't want to argue; she just wanted to hurry up and get out of here before she saw or remembered something she would regret.

With a sigh, she said, "Reneey's Reneey. She is what she is and she doesn't regret it. She's up-front about it. Sometimes honesty like that... is just refreshing."

Hiei raised an eyebrow. "She's going to get herself killed, like that... I would imagine you would get annoyed, babysitting every day."

"She's my friend, the only one I have left, and she's not getting killed if I can help it," Lyn said firmly.

"Hn. Friends are just chess pieces that keep you from your goal... or leave you."

"I won't deny that a lot of them do," Lyn said honestly. "I know quite well by now that the only person you can ever trust one hundred percent is yourself. But when you find the ones who aren't like that, they're worth it."

"And you believe she is? Hn... I highly doubt anyone really is."

Lyn shrugged. "I believe if I am, there have to be other people out there who are, too. _I_ highly doubt that there can be only one decent person in the world."

She paused abruptly and held a finger to her lips, calling for silence. The ears of a bat were far more sensitive than those of normal demons, and she was almost certain she heard...

"There's a demon attacking a human," she announced, her eyes hardening as they changed colors when she shifted into demon form. "I'll get an aerial view -- we'll find it quicker that way."

Hiei shrugged as he started to jump from tree to tree, following Lyn's path through the air. Between her enhanced hearing and the pull of demonic energy, she located the attacker fairly quickly. she landed lightly on the ground outside the alleyway, took two steps -- and froze dead. Her eyes were wide, her complexion pale; if she had had a normal human heart, it would have skipped a beat. It was impossible. There was just no way.


	25. Chapter 25

A/N:

---

27.

Hiei leapt down beside Lyn and growled when she remained immobile. He leapt forward and in a flash, dismembered the demon. The human who was being attacked dropped to the ground, half crawling and half running away.

"W-wh-what kind of cult is this?!" he yelled.

Hiei glared. "Hn. We're called demons. Foolish human..." He turned away and wiped the blood off his sword, not caring that some stupid human was having a mental meltdown. Why, it made Hiei enjoy this job even more.

When he came back to Lyn, his glare hardened. "Baka onna, how could you come into this being as frail as that? You're not equipped for battle -- go back to that other girl. It's where you belong, being protected, not to protect!"

Once Hiei came into her field of vision and blocked out all else, Lyn blinked and came back to herself. Her voice was hoarse but normal as she said slowly, "You think I stopped because I was afraid? Because I couldn't fight when it came down to it?"

Hiei glared. "Well, what else?"

"... Because otherwise, I would have killed him myself," Lyn hissed, her eyes suddenly losing their blankness and seeming to catch fire. "And by 'him,' I don't mean the demon. I mean that freaking piece of scum he was attacking."

Hiei raised an eyebrow. "You know the human?"

Lyn's jaw clenched and unclenched as she tried to find words. Her arms crossed over her chest defensively, but her nails were digging into her forearms in anger. Finally, she looked away from Hiei's gaze and growled, "I grew up here; I was raised as a human. That one is named Kyle. Kyle Eames. You could say he's one of the reasons I came to realize no one can be trusted."

Hiei shrugged. "Like I said... friends either leave you... or hold you back."

Lyn's lip curled into something halfway between a snarl and a dark, humorless smirk. "If he had just been my friend, it wouldn't have been a problem when he decided he wanted to sleep around." Her eyes flashed to the body of the demon on the ground and snarled, "If anyone ever deserved to be demon chow, it was that smug douchebag."

Hiei merely said, "Hn," and left it at that, but his eyes showed something else. He knew how it felt to be betrayed by a person you had cared for, but he didn't dare let anyone, especially some random girl he had just met, know that.

"Then you should have stopped me before I decided to let him live," he growled before turning on his heel and walking off.

Lyn didn't bother answering or trying to follow him. For a long moment, she stared at the scene before her, watching the blood of the renegade demon soaking into the ground. Then, when the pain clawing at the inside of her chest became too much, she spread her wings and beat them toward the ground hard. She didn't know where she was going and she didn't care; she just needed to fly until she forgot how to feel anymore.

---

Reneey sighed. She was worried for Lyn but she knew her friend could take care of herself. She, Youko, and Kuronue were walking in random forests until a familiar gust of wind passed them at a very fast pace. They looked up to see Lyn but then in a flash, she disappeared among the clouds.

"... Where's Hiei?" Kuronue growled.

"Maybe he left... if he found the demon, he should have notified us," Youko said simply.

"Maybe she just killed him," Kuronue muttered hopefully.

---

The longer Lyn flew madly through the sky, the more her mind and emotions slowly went blank. It felt so much better letting go than feeling that constant pain in her chest. She didn't know where she was, nor did she care much. Until something hit her -- and hit her hard. It almost made her lose herself and fall to the ground, but she managed to regain composition.

"What the heck?"

You should go back, a voice sobbed in her head. Go back and protect her... Go back...

Lyn shook her head and descended a little, certain the high altitude was causing her to hear things. "I'm going insane," she muttered softly.

She's in danger... You left her... She could die... Your fault, the same sobbing voice rang louder inside of her head.

"No one's gonna die! Seriously, what's the matter with you, Lyn?" she chastised herself.

Suddenly an image of Reneey lying in a puddle of her own blood on the grassy ground flashed in Lyn's mind; then that changed to Reneey dead in a bathroom; then to her being attacked and ripped apart by a couple of demons; then to her being tortured and shot dead. All of these images came rushing so fast and so unexpectedly that Lyn lost it and came crashing down. She hit a tree and tumbled down branch after branch until finally she hit the ground.

She's dying... Your friend Reneey is dying...

"N-no one's dying," Lyn objected, but her mind was shaken. Everything else was lost... What did she have left if her best friend was gone, too?

---

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LEFT HER?!" Kuronue yelled when Hiei came into the clearing.

"Hn. She wanted to be alone and seems perfectly capable of taking care of herself. So I left her alone."

"Well, may -- AHH!" Reneey screamed as she felt arms wrap around her waist and pull her up into the air.

Youko had his rose whip out in a second and was about to attack but stopped when he saw that it was Lyn. He blinked, wondering why she had decided to swoop down and literally kidnap Reneey, so he started to follow by jumping from tree to tree.

Reneey's screaming did not stop, just going louder as the pair climbed higher into the air.

You must protect Reneey... She will die, too... your fault... protect her... That voice, which Lyn could now identify as a man's, rang even louder in Lyn's ears than Reneey's screams.

Had Lyn remembered how to cry, tears would have been streaming down her face at the mere thought by now. Tears, however, were not her forte; she was pretty sure her tearducts had been disconnected from her emotions a long time ago.

"Calm down," she said quietly, pulling Reneey closer. "It'll be fine. I'm saving you."


	26. Chapter 26

28.

Lyn had flown Reneey to a cave on the east side of the forest. As soon as Reneey's feet touched the ground, she clawed, bit, and thrashed her way out of Lyn's arms. This wasn't Lyn, it wasn't her!

"Let me go! Whoever you are, let me go!" Reneey screeched, knowing Lyn's ears would be sensitive to loud noises.

The echoes the cavern created just made it worse; Lyn clapped her hands over her ears. The screaming was muffled but the words in her head just came louder.

Once Reneey was out of Lyn's arms, she scurried away to the opposite side of the cave. "L-Lyn?" she asked slowly and shakily.

YOU MUST PROTECT HER! the voice started to screech, turning from a sobbing man's voice to one full of power and intimidation like that of a possessed creature. DON'T LET HER OUT OF YOUR GRASP! SHE'LL DIE AND IT WILL BE ALL YOUR FAULT!

"I'm trying!" Lyn shouted back, but it wasn't under her control that her hand reached out and grabbed Reneey's arm. Reneey's cry of pain at the tightness of her grip broke Lyn's grasp, sending both hands back to her ears, but suddenly she was having trouble keeping them there. Her arms shook, fighting against her own will to break away and pull Reneey back toward her.

Reneey winced when Lyn's hands closed on both of her arms this time. "Please... Lyn, you're hurting me!" She was used to Lyn's bear hugs that sometimes were tight, but this was almost bone-crushing tightness. At the sound of Reneey's whimpering, something in Lyn snapped; she pushed Reneey off.

"Go away!"

"W-wh-what?"

"You're not safe. S-something's in me!" Lyn yelled as her hands tried to grab Reneey again. Lyn ground her teeth and shut her eyes tightly, fighting not to close her arms around Reneey again.

"Go!" she ordered, digging her nails hard into her own arms in attempt to restrain them. "Now! Get Youko or D --"

Lyn's eyes opened then and they were suddenly electric blue -- eyes that weren't hers. The voice that came from her mouth was smoother, deeper, but fragmented as if it was being transmitted across a bad electronic connection: "No, you must stay... I'll protect you this time, I swear it..."

Reneey swallowed hard. "W-well... What if you hurt me? Who will protect me from you?" She knew she had to get away and find Youko or Kuronue -- hell, maybe even Hiei.

NO SUCH THING! I WILL NEVER HURT THE ONE I LOVE! the Satanic voice rose in Lyn's head.

"Of course I won't hurt you... I have to protect you. You know that, right?"

Reneey showed Lyn the bloody lines on her arms from Lyn's nails. "What about these cuts?"

"... I... I didn't," Lyn's voice broke through. "Go -- go now!"

Reneey ran from the cave as fast as she could while Lyn was distracted by her inner conflict.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! SHE'S GOING TO BE KILLED, ALONG WITH THE CHILD SHE'S CARRYING! YOU STUPID -- NO, I'M STUPID! I'M GOING TO RESCUE HER!

---

Youko was jumping from tree to tree, following Kuronue, who was flying above. For some reason, he couldn't find them anymore. Why? He could still sense people when they masked their scents...

Then another odor caught his nose, one that made his eyes blaze: Reneey's blood. If possible, he just sped up more.

"What's going on?" Kuronue asked half of Youko but half of himself. "This isn't like Lyn. There's no way she would let Reneey et hurt if she could stop it."

"Daddy!" Reneey yelled. Youko leapt down and instantly took Reneey's arm. The bleeding had stopped, but there were visible red lines on her arm.

"Something's wrong with L--"

Before Reneey could finish her sentence, Youko was hit hard and fast and sent flying backward.

"YOU STAY AWAY FROM HER!" a darker, deeper, almost growling voice snarled from Lyn's mouth as she pulled Reneey closer to her, nails cutting into Reneey's arms again.

Kuronue's eyes widened in disbelief. "Lyn? Wh-what happened to you?"

"You're not taking her," the voice coming from Lyn's mouth snarled -- Kuronue refused to call it Lyn's voice even in his thoughts, because it wasn't.

Somehow, Kuronue was certain this was all Hiei's fault.

"Hn," said Hiei. "Onna, let her go or at least loosen up -- her whining and screaming will make me chop both of your heads off."

Lyn's eyes -- or rather, the freakishly blue yes that were definitely not Lyn's -- switched to him. "It was you, wasn't it? You were the one who did it last time." A feral snarl tore from Lyn's lips. "You will not take her away from me again!"

Hiei raised an eyebrow. "Listen, onna: I have no idea what you're talking about but if you're going to hold that baka, at least cover her mouth."

"It won't do any good, trying to reason with her," a new voice said as Koenma popped in, floating in the air between Kuronue and Hiei, so suddenly that his appearance caused Lyn to snarl and drag Reneey back half a step.

"What are you talking about?" Kuronue half snarled, himself.

"She's possessed," Koenma explained in a voice that sounded almost sympathetic. Almost. "By an emotion spirit... Human spirits who would not cross over due to their strong emotional baggage left unchecked in life. They usually can't possess humans because they can only latch onto a soul of great power... that is also in great pain. The power, obviously, is necessary to keep hem from totally destroying their host. The pain, well... It's what makes them vulnerable."

"But why is it trying to protect Reneey?" Kuronue asked.

"Presumably, that was the spirit's unfinished work," Koenma said with a shrug. "Someone he was supposed to protect, but couldn't, so now in the afterlife is still trying to make amends."

Hiei growled. "Then how the hell do we get rid of it?"

"Maybe we let it think it did what it stayed around to do," Youko suggested. "If someone did attack reneey and it kept that attack from happening, its work would be done and it would let Lyn go, right?"

"Mm, maybe," Koenma said slowly. "There's really no way to know for sure, though."

"Uh, no offense, Youko, but if that thing knows how to use Lyn's fire powers, you and your plants are screwed," Kuronue pointed out. "Somehow I doubt it'll hold back from frying you if it really thinks you're attacking so maybe you shouldn't be the one to try that."

All eyes landed on Hiei.

"No," he said firmly and simply.

"Yes, you will," Youko said.

"No, I won't."

"You'll go to jail," Koenma said.

"And I'll escape again."

"Um, guys... um... yeah... the whatever it is... is sort of PULLING ME UP IN THE AIR!" Reneey interjected.

"Now, do you want Reneey to keep whining and screaming?" Kuronue glared at Hiei.

"FINE!" Hiei snapped, adding in a mutter, "Stupid rotten jackasses..."

"Well, if you're going to try it, I suggest you do so before they're a hundred feet off the ground," Koenma pointed out

Hiei didn't even acknowledge that Koenma had spoken, just jumped off the ground with his sword out and ready. Lyn -- or the spirit possessing Lyn, at least -- snarled and beat its wings toward the ground. Only they weren't aimed toward the ground; they were aimed at Hiei because just then, a wave of flame and scorching heat erupted from the tips of her wings.

Kuronue's eyebrows shot up, his face a little paler than usual. "I didn't know she could do that," he said slowly. "That was Kisami's attack."

Hiei glared as he dodged the flames, barely singing the edge of his cloak, still heading straight toward Reneey. Lyn snarled again, strangely blue eyes wild as talonlike nails stretched out, slashing across Hiei's arm and chest before grasping a handful of ihs cloak and throwing him, hard, toward the ground. It took all of Hiei's restraint not to lash out and try to kill Lyn as he was knocked back down.

"You will not touch her!"

"Fine... I won't hurt her, you baka onna."

"You're lying!" the voice accused by now it was slowly fading closer to that sobbing man's voice that had first spoken in Lyn's head. "You killed her because I wasn't there to protect her... You killed her for some -- some stupid things from the house she would have given you anyway! Why?!"

Hiei growled. This spirit is getting on my fucking last nerve. "No, I'm not lying... If you let me go, I'll go away..." And then maybe not kill you, he added in his head.

The spirit, however, didn't really seem to be listening. Shaking, Lyn's feet hit the ground, pulling Reneey close and sobbing with no tears. Even under the influence of a slightly psychotic spirit, Lyn's eyes still seemed incapable of crying. "Why...?"

Reneey swallowed hard as she hugged the spirit inside Lyn's body. "It's okay... you protected me... see... You did what you wanted... You protected me... her..."

"... Reneey... That's right... You're not Rachel... But I tried... Maybe somehow, this makes amends... I'm sorry I hurt you... I just hope she forgives me..."

The voice faded as the spirit of a young man with blue eyes and glasses slowly stepped out of Lyn's body. Lyn's eyes faded back to green and she blinked twice, looking confused.

"... Where the freaking heck did you come from?"


End file.
